Anya: [as Anyanka] You trusting fool! How do you know the other world is any better than this?
Giles: Because it has to be.
Xander: But you know what really bugs me? Okay, we kissed. It was a mistake, but I know that was positively the last time we were ever gonna kiss.
Willow: Darn tootin'.
Xander: And they burst in rescuing us, without even knocking? I mean this is really all their fault.
Buffy: Your logic does not resemble our earth logic.
Xander: Mine is much more advanced.
Angel: The Master rose. He let me live... to punish me. I kept hopin' maybe you'd come. My destiny...
Buffy: Is this a get-in-my-pants thing? You guys in Sunnydale talk like I'm the second coming.
Cordelia: I wish Buffy Summers had never come to Sunnydale.
Anya: [Anya has just become human] Done.
Cordelia: That would be cool. No wait, I wish Buffy Summers had never been born.
Anya: [bewildered] Done.
Cordelia: And I wish that Xander Harris never again knows the touch of a woman. And that Willow wakes up tomorrow covered in monkey hair.
Cordelia: In fact, I wish all men, except maybe the dumb and the really agreeable kind, disappear off the face of the Earth. That would be so cool.
Cordelia: No, no, no way. I wish us into bizarro-land and you guys are still together?
Xander: [as Vamp Xander] "Gotta get Buffy here." Isn't that what they called The Slayer?
Willow: [as Vamp Willow] Hm, Buffy, ooh scary.
Xander: [as Vamp Xander] Someone has to talk to her people. That name is striking fear in nobody's hearts.
Cordelia: You know what I've been asking myself a lot this last week? Why me? Why do *I* get impaled? Why do I get bitten by snakes? Why do I fall for incredible losers? And, you know, I think I've finally figured it out. What my problem is. It's Buffy Summers.
Giles: [reading] "In order to defeat Anyanka, one must destroy her power center. This should reverse all the wishes she's granted rendering her mortal and powerless again." You see, without her power center, she'll j-just be a-an ordinary woman again. And all of this will be, um, well, different. Well, I'd say that my-my Watcher muscles haven't completely atrophied after all.
Buffy: [sarcastic] Great. What's her power center?
Giles: [checks the book] Um, well, um, uh... It doesn't say.
Buffy: Why don't I just put a stake through her heart?
Giles: She's not a vampire.
Buffy: Yeah? Well, you'd be surprised how many things that'll kill.
Giles: I don't want to kill her, Miss Summers. I want to reverse whatever affect she's had on this... this world.
Buffy: You're taking an awful lot on faith here, Jeeves.
Buffy: Kill the bad fairy, destroy the bad fairy's power center, whatever... and all the troubles go away?
The Master: [holds up a young girl] Hungry? I've lost my appetite for this one. She keeps looking at me. I'm trying to eat and she looks at me!
Buffy: The world is what it is. We fight, we die. Wishing doesn't change that.
Giles: I have to believe in a better world.
Buffy: Go ahead. I have to live in this one.
Xander: [as Vamp Xander] So you're a Watcher, huh? Watch this.
Cordelia: Okay, not funny. Hey. You. Where did you put my car?
Cordelia: My auto. El convertablo.
Buffy: I don't play well with others. Now, I'm gonna ask you this once, and then I'm gonna get testy.
Cordelia: What is this? Some kind of sick joke? Harmony told me you were dead.
Xander: [as Vamp Xander] Now, why would she say something like that? Let's think.
Buffy: Okay, that was too close for comfort. Not that slaying's ever comfy, but... you know what I mean.
[to a vampire]
Xander: [as Vamp Xander] Slap my hand, dead soul man.
[after Buffy kills a non-vampire demon]
Willow: Isn't he gonna go poof?
Cordelia Chase: [about vampire-Xander and vampire-Willow] No way! I wish us into bizarro-world and you two are still together?