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Memorable quotes for
"Buffy the Vampire Slayer" Superstar (2000)

Xander: [about Jonathan] So, we're saying he did a spell just to make us think he was cool?
Giles: Yes.
Xander: That is so cool.

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[after seeing vampires drinking sloppily from a dead victim]
Willow Rosenberg: I don't care if it is an orgy of death. There's still such a thing as a napkin.

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Xander Harris: [practicing a quick-draw with a stake] The quick-draw is about more than speed. It's also about pointing the stake the right way. And, there can be splinter issues. It is a true test of dexterity.
Anya: [re milk carton] Can you open this?
Xander Harris: No, I tear it and it gets all sloshy.

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[Giles and company are researching old magic books]
Riley Finn: These spells, these really work? I mean, can you really "turn your enemies inside out"? Or "learn to excrete gold coins"?
Anya: That one's not so much fun.
Willow Rosenberg: They work, Riley. But they take concentration, being attuned with the forces of the universe.
Xander Harris: Right. You can't just go "librum incendere" and expect...
[Xander's book bursts into flames and he slams it shut, extinguishing it]
Giles: [wearily] Xander, don't speak Latin in front of the books.

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Spike: Oh, look. Jonathan. Taking the little sidekick out for a walk, are we?
Buffy: Shut up, Spike.
Spike: Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh! Semi-harsh language from Betty. You're feisty when big guy's standing beside you.
[strokes her hair and says seductively]
Spike: Someday, Sweet Slayer, I would love to take you on. See you face the evil alone for once.
[Jonathan slams Spike up against the crypt wall]
Jonathan Levinson: That's enough of the creepy small talk. We're looking for a monster.
Spike: Why would I know about that?
Jonathan Levinson: Every demon in this town's gunning for you right now, so I figure you're probably keeping pretty good track of 'em. Big arms. Mark on its head. Have you seen it?
Spike: No. But then again, I'm probably lying.

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Riley Finn: Did anyone else feel way too tall? I felt *way* too tall.
Xander Harris: I liked his clothes. He had really cool clothes.
Willow Rosenberg: I still don't understand how he got the house and everything.
Anya: And who really did star in The Matrix?
Riley Finn: Wait! That wasn't real either?

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Buffy: Anya, when you were a demon, you granted wishes, right?
Anya: Vengeance wishes on ex-boyfriends. I'd wish he was a dog, or ugly, or in love with President McKinley or something.
Buffy: But someone could wish the whole world to be different, right? That's possible?
Anya: Sure, alternate realities. You could, uh, could have like a world without shrimp. Or with, you know, nothing but shrimp. You could even make like a-a freaky world where Jonathan's like some kind of not-perfect mouth-breather if that's what's blowing up your skirt these days. Just don't ask me to live there!

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Xander: We knocked 'em dead... which they already were.
Willow Rosenberg: We knocked 'em deader.

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[to Jonathan]
Xander: Oh! Oh! He's like your kryptonite.

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Adam: I'm aware. I know every molecule of myself and everything around me. No one - no human, no demon has ever been as awake and alive as I am. You are all just shadows.

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Buffy: Anya, tell them about the alternate universes.
Anya: Oh, okay. Umm... Say you really like shrimp a lot. Or we could say you don't like shrimp at all. "Blah, I wish there weren't any shrimp," you'd say to yourself...
Buffy: Stop! You're saying it wrong. I think that Jonathan may be doing something so that he's manipulating the world, and we're all like his pawns.
Anya: Or prawns.
Buffy: Stop with the shrimp! I am trying to do something here!

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Spike: I live here. I wasn't exactly pining for a noisy visit from Wonder Jonathan and his fluffy battle kittens.

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Buffy: Giles, do you have a Jonathan swimsuit calendar?
Giles: [defensively] No.
[pause]
Giles: Yes. It-it was a gift.

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