"Buffy the Vampire Slayer" Lies My Parents Told Me (TV Episode 2003) Poster

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10/10
One of my favorite BTVS episodes
katierose2959 September 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This episode is so d*nm good that it completely makes season seven for me. Seriously, five episodes from the end of the series, BTVS pulls out "Lies My Parents Told Me" and makes me fall in love with this show all over again. It's got Spike and Dru, real explanations of character history and a fight scene that just flat out rocks. I always enjoy the Buffyverse's vampire flashback episodes, but this one is probably my very favorite.

"Lies My Parents Told Me" is about three sets of children and their "parents." There's Buffy and Giles, who are growing apart. Principal Woods and his mother, the Slayer Spike killed in New York. And Spike and his mum. Yep. Spike had a doting, mother back in the 1880s and her death has been weighing on him for over a century. In an effort to deactivate the First's trigger, the Scoobies put a magical stone inside Spike's head. It turns out that the song that keeps setting him off is the lullaby that his mother always sang to him. Spike acts defensive and refuses to tell Giles anymore. Buffy is on Spike's side and tells Giles to back off. Giles and Mr. Wood come up with a plan to kill Spike... For Buffy's own good.

While Giles keeps Buffy busy, Mr. Wood takes Spike to his "work shop." Really it's a shed covered in crosses. Once he has Spike inside he starts up that song "triggering" Spike to go insane. Mr. Wood wants to kill the vampire who murdered his mother. At first he seems to be winning the fight. But, that's only because Spike is caught up in his memories of his own mother. She was sick, and when Dru made Spike a vampire, he tried to "cure" his mother by making her one, too. He didn't understand that his mother would turn into a demon. When his mother tried to seduce and then kill him, Spike staked her. He's never gotten over the horror of it. Now as he remember it all though, he realizes that his mother really did love him and his trigger is de-activated. He begins fighting Mr. Wood, beating the principal into the ground. Buffy, discovering Giles plan, dashes up just as Spike stalks out of the shed. She tells Mr. Wood that if he ever tries to hurt Spike again, Spike will kill him... And Buffy will let him do it, because Spike is the strongest warrior that they have. Then she goes home and refuses to speak with Giles.

There are some incredibly good parts of this episode. All the flashbacks are great. To Spike admiring Nikki Wood's coat in New York, to William/Spike reciting another terrible poem, to Spike/William and Dru dancing around his mothers' living room... I just love it. It's kinna funny that of everyone in the Buffyverse, Spike apparently had the most privileged, supportive home life. I guess it explains his romantic streak. He grew up with a lot of love. And it makes prefect sense that Spike would try to cure his mother by making her a vampire. He never really lost his humanity the way other vampires do, so he had no idea that anything could go wrong. He was so shocked and scared when his "mother" started tearing into him after her change. The look on his face when she dies just breaks my heart. Finally, I like that Giles' cited Angel and Buffy's relationship as a reason to get rid of Spike. He's never gotten over Angel killing Jenny. I think that a lot of Giles' fears about Spike are actually left over from his experiences when Angel turned on them.

On a side note, "Lies My Parents Told Me" will tie into the "Angel" episode "Orpheus" this season and into the "Angel" season five episode "Destiny." "Destiny" seems to show the events between Spike sireing his mother and his later return home. It explains why he's all disheveled and why Dru's not there. Poor Spike had a rough night.

On the down side, I flat out don't believe that Giles would try to kill Spike like that. Would he try to get rid of Spike to protect Buffy? Yes. Would he even kill Spike himself if it came down to the line? Yes. But, would he send Mr. Wood to ambush Spike? No. Not the Giles I know. Firstly, Giles has always has a frustrated affection for Spike. He'd be sure there was no other option before he staked Spike. Secondly, if Giles was going to execute Spike, he'd do it himself. He wouldn't send Principal Wood. Giles has too much respect for Spike's abilities to think that a regular human guy could take him in a fight. And lastly, Giles knows that Buffy will see this a betrayal. She's the Slayer and she's the one who makes these calls. Giles has always been about Buffy standing on her own. He wouldn't undermine her authority like that. I love this episode, but I have too much respect for Giles to really "believe" some of the scenes. It goes against the heart of Giles' character and suddenly paints him as a pseudo bad guy.

My favorite part of the episode: Spike telling Dru that they will ravage Europe together... And that his mother is coming along. Dru gets this baffled look on her face. "You want to bring your mum with us? To eat, you mean?" Not only did I have to pause the DVD because I was laughing so hard the first time I saw that scene, but I think it also says a lot about Dru. She chose William/Spike because she sensed he was somehow different. And now he's a "different" kind of vampire. Angel ate his parents and all of Dru's family, but Spike wants his mother to live with them. It must be really confusing for poor Drusilla.
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10/10
Oedipus calling
Joxerlives4 June 2012
Warning: Spoilers
The Good; All the flashback sequences are wonderful. Great to see the real Dru on the show again, love her expression when Spike talks of bringing his mum with them. Possibly the worst introduction of any new girlfriend to a prospective mother-in-law in history? The Wood/Giles and Spike/Woods scenes are awesome.

The Bad; Spike deciding to leave Nikki alone for a while after finding her beggars belief, couldn't they have had a police car pull up or something? Or was Spike worried about messing up his hair? No real comparison between Joyce and Nikki, Joyce died of natural causes, although heartbreaking for Buffy and Dawn there was no one to blame, it was just her time. Unsouled Spike hunted down and murdered Nikki for fun!

Best line; Buffy (to Giles); "I think you've taught me everything I need to know" Ooooohhhhhh!

Women good/men bad; At the end of the ep Buffy shares a moment of intimacy with Dawn in bed then closes the door on Giles. The implication is that she chooses her literal and metaphorical sister(s) over her father figure?

Kinky dinky; Spike tells Nikki he's going to 'ride her hard'. She responds that he's 'wet and limp'. Xander bemoans the fact that Spike's chains weren't there last week when he and Anya had their breakup sex. Dru refers to Spike as 'sweet Willy' whilst he describes her as saucy.

Captain Subtext; Needless to say a lot of people speculate on an incestuous attraction between Spike and his mum. I don't buy that, I think William is just a devoted son to his loving mother, even soulless Spike is horrified at her suggestion. I'm quite prepared to accept Connor having sex with Cordy, that Ares may be Xena's dad, even the fan theory that Buffy and Dawn find solace in one another's bodies at the end of Forever (and who'd blame them if they did?) etc but not this. Maybe Spike's mum is jealous of Drusilla whom she refers to as 'That trollop'. Note Dru calls herself Spike's 'Other mummy'. Check out her little look as Spike stakes her, almost of relief/affection? Could she have been goading Spike into killing her? Speaking of Oedipal implications Wood tells Buffy that she reminds him of his mother. Interestingly whilst most girls would consider that a turn off, she seems to rather like the idea. According to the commentary Spike's mum is called 'Anne' which of course is Buffy's middle name. Upon seeing Spike's relationship with his own mother I think we all understand his feelings for Joyce a lot better.

Andrew thinks Fred sounds 'effeminate'. In a Freudian slip Buffy substitutes 'prophylactic' for 'prokaryote' in regard to Spike.

Guantanamo Bay; Calculating general Giles wishes to kill Spike out of logic. Wood by contrast know's it's wrong but acts because his mother's love is more powerful than all reason. Giles acts increasingly like Travers/the Watcher's Council like Buffy in Potential, giving her girls their own Cruciantenam.

Questions and observations; Buffy is now willing to sacrifice Dawn to save the world. Because Dawn's older or because Buffy knows there's a heaven? Probably the latter as she says it after Giles remarks about what she's been through (death/afterlife). She regards death as the reward for being human, the big dessert at the end of the meal. Dawn is no longer her sole focus? She comments Dawn is 'tough'. Spike retains some of his humanity as a vampire (as the Judge senses in Becoming pt1), perhaps because of Dru's link to the PTB? When his mum is sick Spike suggests fetching Dr Gull, Queen Victoria's physician and a popular suspect for Jack the Ripper. Willow receives her phonecall from Fred in the Angel ep 'Orpheus'. Buffy still feels bad about how she treated everyone in 'Get it done', her punishment by the Shadowmen actually benefiting her by bringing her to her senses in that regard, she's not so hardass any more. We really do have bad boy Spike back here, the guy we know from seasons 2-4 but playing for the good guys. But deep down he'll always be William the Bloody (awful poet). He knew Buffy was in the light and he in the darkness. If he pulled her into the darkness he wouldn't love her anymore so he pulls himself into the light instead (with thanks to White Avenger from Buffyboards) Nikki speaks of Robin liking playing with the 'Spooky doodas' at her Watcher's house. Does she mean the Shadow puppets we see in 'Get it Done'? It speaks of Buffy's prowess as a Slayer that she can toy so effortlessly with the vamp whilst Giles talks to her. Does Spike mean what he says about not caring for Nikki or is this just revenge for his beating? Note both Spike and Angel(us) killed their mothers. Also although we don't see her use it Spike's mum has a wheelchair, no wonder he so hated being stuck in one in season 2.

So who's right? You understand Wood's point, imagine if Spike had killed Joyce and went around wearing her coat as a trophy? Would anything on earth stop Buffy staking him? Or would he wake up on fire as Dawn promised? Again Wood is very similar to Holtz on Angel or Callisto on Xena. Note that Wood realises that souled Spike ISN'T the man who killed Nikki, he has to play 'Early one morning' to bring him out. Rare to have 2 eps with such a similar theme (Andrew and Spike's flashback filled redemption) in a row but it works fine.

Marks out of 10; 10/10 brilliant!
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8/10
Robin and Spike have mummy issues
ossie854 January 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Giles brings back an enchanted object to help stop Spike's trigger from working. Spike has flashbacks to the days of William and we see his relationship with his mother, and the origin of the mysterious song. Wood and Giles decide it is time to take Spike out as he has become a liability. Willow gets a call from Fred in Los Angeles.

Why It's So Good - David Fury's last Buffy script shows us his many talents in the area of Spike's insecurities.

Watch Out For - You, me and mum. A creepy situation, and that line delivered perfectly.

Quote - " Because the military gave him a soul? Sorry." - Robin.
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10/10
A story of redemption,tragedy and vengeance
stevegibbons197125 August 2016
Warning: Spoilers
*Spoiler Alert* This is a superb episode. I confess,I am a huge fan of James Marsters,whose performance gains in style and subtlety with each season,working from being an (albeit witty) monster,to a Vampire suffering loss,and then,through Seasons 5 and 6,desire,lust and his attempt at sexual assault,leading to him seeking redemption. In this season,Spike has regained (at great length,and through great pain)his soul. As he seeks this redemption,Spike suffers great pain,as true redemption should be,and the further fact that a 'Trigger' is used (a song attached to his childhood and his nurturing Mother). Into the mix is Principal Wood,seeking vengeance for his Mother's death (a single mother Slayer no less,killed by Spike!). Complex issues of rejection,love and loss are dealt with,and the performances and script are all superb. A wonderful example of how horror and fantasy can go to great psychological depths.
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8/10
The One Where Spike Returns To His Past, Sort Of...
taylorkingston3 June 2015
Warning: Spoilers
I really love this episode. I love seeing Spike's early vampire life and how he was influenced by the people around him.

In this episode, Giles believes he can deactivate Spike's trigger, the one being used by The First. To make the trigger, a song, useless and ineffective, Spike must think back to his past and get over the experience that makes the song an emotional trigger for him. Robin then takes Spike to his place where he plays the song, because he wants to kill Spike for killing his Slayer mother thirty years earlier. But, Spike wins and leaves him alive, since he felt like he owed him that.

Best part of the episode: When Spike travels back to his past.

Worst part of the episode: When Spike leaves Robin alive.

Overall, I give this episode an 8 out of 10, which in my ratings book is: Awesome.
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8/10
Spike's Trial
Samuel-Shovel27 February 2019
Warning: Spoilers
In "Lies My Parents Told Me", Principal Wood and Giles conspire to kill Spike, feeling he is a liability to the group and can turn on them if the First activates him. Wood turns on the music that triggers a memory of his mother as he flashes back to a time with her. We watch as he turns his mother into a vampire and she rejects him. In a fit of anger he stakes her. But modern Spike is able to deal with the skeletons in his closet and realize his mother did indeed love him. Spike overpowers Wood but doesn't kill him. Buffy learns of the plot and is upset. As the episode ends she gives the cold shoulder to Giles.

I love a good flashback episode and this one is chalk full of them! Seeing Spike and Dru back together is always fun, her being one of my favorite characters. I don't know how I feel about Spike still having affection for his mother after he's been turned into a vampire. It seems very against vampire-type to me. He should have no love for her like she doesn't have for him. Although Spike always has been a bit of a sentimentalist: his love for Dru and Buffy for example.

As hard as he tries to be cool, through the veneer he's just a giant poetry-loving lovebug.
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8/10
Love the episode.
marieke-872-93822321 September 2018
Warning: Spoilers
I've been watching and re-watching this show since the original release, but I only just caught on to this major plot hole! How does Buffy not know that Wood is the New York slayers' son, when Spike told her about killing a New York slayer in the episode Fool for Love Season 5?! Seems to me that she is smart enough to do the math... And after that she should have picked up on Woods vendetta way sooner!!
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8/10
Did the fruit fall very far from the tree?
skay_baltimore12 August 2010
Warning: Spoilers
Robin, as a small child, watches Spike fight and kill his mother in what appears to be Central Park, NY.

Giles has some sort of magic revelation "bug" that Willow activates, after which it slides inside Spike's eye then into his brain.

Dru...back in time...in Spike/William's Victorian Parlor: "Ooh, such a pretty house you have, sweet William. It smells of daffodils...and viscera." Viscera. That Dru. Between her and Anya...and Spike...they've got the best lines in the whole series.

Oh...and William/Spike...siring his own mother? Now THAT'S kinky!!

Robin Wood seeks to avenge his mother's death at the hands of Spike, so he brings Giles on board to distract Buffy, lures Spike into his "sanctuary", plays the song that acts as the trigger to bring out the worst in Spike, and girds his loins for battle.

The overlay of Robin avenging his mother's death and Spike/William's mother destroying him after he'd sired her, while the two of them are fighting is -- to borrow a bit of Dru's mindset -- delicious. (Is there anything more devastating for one of the world's true Big Bad's than to be called "a limp sentimental fool" by his own mother?)

A little intimation (ok...a BIG intimation) by Spike's mum that he was more interested in "getting back inside of her" than he'd be in exploring a relationship with Dru; she vamps out; he spikes her.

Then Spike and Robin have a real heart to heart. And Spike -- as is not uncommon -- really lays the wood to Wood. The truth hurts. And nobody knows Slayers quite like Spike. And probably to Robin's surprise -- Spike really opens his eyes to the truth he'd run from his whole life: Slayers love slaying more than anything -- or anyone -- else. Spike also realizes that his mother loved him. After that, he was able to listen to the song she used to sing to him without it triggering anything evil.

The episode was great. Right up until the point that Buffy opens her mouth. She is -- without a doubt -- THE weakest link in this entire series. What a shame the writers, producers, and directors didn't realize that. Not to mention the majority of the BtVS fan base. She knows everything -- more then the 3 tribesmen; more than Giles; more than anyone. But that's the whole problem -- she does NOT know everything. And she -- more than anyone else -- undermines her own stated mission.

8 out of 10 -- DESPITE Buffy
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4/10
Goodbye to the Scooby Gang
spazzztic19 April 2010
Warning: Spoilers
This is an excellent show... but it is a terrible episode of Buffy. For six and a half years we are repeatedly told that Buffy must fight alone, but that she gets her real strength comes from her friends. In this episode, Buffy begins to choose Spike over Giles, Willow and Xander. From this episode on, the show is no longer about Buffy and her friends and becomes about Buffy and Spike.

Spike is a compelling character, and James Marsters is an amazing actor. However - as a fan of the show - I will never understand why Joss Whedon chose to end the series by pushing the Scoobies so far into the background and replacing them with Spike. The last five or six episodes of the series completely weaken everything that came before.

In the final episode there is a horribly awkward scene where Buffy tells Xander "You are my strength." That scene actually annoyed me, because it made me feel like Joss was trying to pay lip service to what the show was ONCE about. But from what transpired between this episode and the finale, the Scoobies were no more... and my love of this series was forever diminished.
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