Webs: Oh, my God!
Buffy: Oh, your God, what?
Webs: Oh, well, you know, not my God, because I defy him and all of his works. Does he exist? Is there word on that, by the way?
Buffy: Nothing solid.
Cassie Newton: [as the First] You don't know hurt. This last year is gonna seem like cake after what I put you and your friends through and I am not a fan of easy death. Fact is, the whole good versus evil, balancing the scales thing, I'm over it. I'm done with the mortal coil. But believe me, I'm going for a big finish.
Willow: From beneath you, it devours.
Cassie Newton: Oh, not it. Me.
Webs: I heard a lot of rumors about you back then. You were all mysterious.
Buffy: I was?
Webs: Well, you were never around. A lot of kids thought you were dating some really old guy, or that you were just heavy religious. Scott Hope said you were gay.
Buffy: What? I dated that ringworm.
Webs: He says that about every girl he breaks up with. And then last year, big surprise, he comes out.
Buffy: Men. Do I know how to pick 'em.
Jonathan: Of course I'm scared. Last time we were here, 33.3 bar percent of us were flayed alive.
Dawn Summers: Anchovies, anchovies, you're so delicious. I love you more than all the other fishes.
Dawn Summers: [accidentally smears pizza sauce on one of Buffy's shirts] Ahh! Hm, she'll think it's blood.
Andrew Wells: [to Warren/The First] You keep leaving me. I hate it when you leave me. One time you died and I ended up a Mexican.
Jonathan: I really miss it. Time goes by and everything drops away. All the cruelty, all the pain, all the humiliation, it all washes away. I miss my friends. I miss my enemies. I miss the people I talked to every day. I miss the people who never knew I existed. I miss 'em all. I wanna talk to them, you know? I wanna find out how they're doing. I-I wanna know what's going on in their lives.
Andrew Wells: You know what? They don't wanna talk to you. All those people you just mentioned, not one of them is sitting around going, "I wonder what Jonathan's up to right now." Not one of them cares about you.
Jonathan: Well, I still care about them. That's why I'm here.
Warren Meers: [as The First] We've been over this. That death thing was all part of the master plan. C'mon, if you strike me down?
Andrew Wells: I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, of course. Do you think Willow can kill me too?
Warren Meers: [as The First] Hey don't worry if not pulls of his end of the bargain, we'll both become gods.
Andrew Wells: That boy is our last hope.
Warren Meers: [as The First] No, there is another.
Andrew Wells: Wait, really? Who's our last hope?
Warren Meers: [as The First] No I was just going with it. It was a thing. No he's our last hope.
Joyce Summers: [as the First] I love you and I love Buffy but she won't be there for you. When it's bad, Buffy won't choose you. She'll be against you.
Dawn Summers: I cast you out with every prayer from every god that walked the Earth and crawled beneath. I cast you out with the strength of those who love me. I cast your out with the strength I have inside me! I cast you out into the void.
Jonathan: We should have stayed in Mexico.
Andrew Wells: I didn't like it there. Everybody spoke Mexicoan.
Jonathan: You could've learned it. You learned the entire Klingon dictionary in two and a half weeks.
Buffy: I just - if you knew what I've done, what I've let myself become. My best friends don't even - You'd laugh, if you heard some of the things I've done to them.
Webs: Buffy, I'm here to kill you, not to judge you.
[to a vampire she went to school with]
Buffy: Yeah, what I really need is emotional therapy from the evil dead.