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Memorable quotes for
"Brass Eye" Animals (1997)

Nicholas Parsons: [visually edited from a poem about a "trapped elephant"] Aren't we a bunch of fuckwits? An elephant could no more stick its trunk up its arse than we could lick our balls.

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Chris Morris: You're wrong, and you're a grotesquely ugly freak.
[pause, everyone shocked]
Chris Morris: Thanks.

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Chris Morris: In Britain in the last century, it was quite acceptable for a gentleman to lose his virginity to one of London's many whore dogs. Dickens and Prince Albert both boasted of their experience.

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Patrick Da Fronk: The fox feels nothing. It's made of string.

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Chris Morris: Institutionalised cruelty is one thing, but the twisted brain-wrong of a one-off man-mental is quite another. Ted Maul disturbs.

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Michael Van Wijk: Urgent news - Karla has started to ingest her own head. Her dung pump mechanism has blown. There's bloody vegetable gas everywhere. For God's sake, help us pull her trunk out.

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Michael Van Wijk: [referring to an elephant with its trunk lodged in its anus] She needs Wolf power or she will explode in a shower of pulped yams.

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David Jatt: This is the grave of a cow. As you will see, it was killed in unnecessary pain, by a man.

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