- Amy Matthews: Honey, I'm scared for you. You have got to get out of this house.
- Eric: To do what? I mean Mom let's say I do find one of these so called "jobs". I mean, with nothing better than a high school diploma the best I can ask for is minimum wage and what they take out for taxes? I honestly think I could do better solving crimes. When a crime breaks out...
- Amy Matthews: Stop it. Sweetheart, you cannot just mope around the house. Why don't you go out on a date? You used to date all the time.
- Eric: I know but all the girls I used to date have gone off to college.
- Amy Matthews: Oh, I'm sure there is plenty of nice girls right here in town.
- Eric: Townies? You want me to date a townie? Oh, that is great Mom I can see them right now. Sitting on their couch in their ratty bathrobe, watching daytime TV and eating Bonbons!
- [Amy stares at Eric]
- Eric: These are Cocoa Puffs and I'm a detective!
- Topanga Lawrence: *As Cory and Shawn stare lack-jawed at her* Well, isn't somebody gonna say something?
- Shawn Hunter: *To himself, trying to convince* She's my best friend's girl... She's my best friend's girl... *Giving in* *To Topanga* Oh, the heck with that, marry me! I live in a trailer park and I have no education, but my hair does this... *Waves his hands through his hair*
- Shawn Hunter: Shawn!
- Shawn Hunter: *Not caring, still gawking at Topanga* Shut up, man, I'm going for it! *Cory sprays Shawn with a nearby spray bottle* Thanks, thanks. I'm back.
- Cory Matthews: Good. Alright, Topanga. *Puts down the bottle* *Shawn mimes the "call me" gesture to Topanga behind Cory's back* I want... *Looks suspiciously at Shawn, who stops* the name of the guy who did this to you.
- Topanga Lawrence: You don't like it?
- Cory Matthews: No, no, it's not that I don't like it, it's just that I'm in love with this girl who was never interested in what she looked like before. *Shawn begins staring at Topanga's feet* And now I see makeup on your face and polish on you nails and toes and... *To Shawn* Stop looking at her toes.
- Shawn Hunter: *Entranced* But they sparkle!
- Cory Matthews: *To Topanga* I want the name of the guy who did this to you!
- Topanga Lawrence: My stylist's name is Mr. Cellini. Cory, it's just a haircut, it's just some makeup. It's not gonna change me. *Checks watch* Gotta go. *Begins walking away*
- Cory Matthews: Well, where are you going?
- Topanga Lawrence: This outfit with this hair? Hello? Buh-bye, I am *so* at the mall.
- Topanga Lawrence: [as Cory and Shawn stare lack-jawed at her] Well, isn't somebody gonna say something?
- Shawn Hunter: [to himself, trying to convince] She's my best friend's girl... She's my best friend's girl...
- [Giving in]
- Shawn Hunter: [to Topanga] Oh, the heck with that, marry me! I live in a trailer park and I have no education, but my hair does this...
- [Waves his hands through his hair]
- Shawn Hunter: Shawn!
- Shawn Hunter: [Not caring, still gawking at Topanga] Shut up, man, I'm going for it!
- [Cory sprays Shawn with a nearby spray bottle]
- Shawn Hunter: Thanks, thanks. I'm back.
- Cory Matthews: Good. Alright, Topanga.
- [Puts down the bottle]
- Cory Matthews: [Shawn mimes the "call me" gesture to Topanga behind Cory's back] I want...
- [Looks suspiciously at Shawn, who stops]
- Cory Matthews: the name of the guy who did this to you.
- Topanga Lawrence: You don't like it?
- Cory Matthews: No, no, it's not that I don't like it, it's just that I'm in love with this girl who was never interested in what she looked like before.
- [Shawn begins staring at Topanga's feet]
- Cory Matthews: And now I see makeup on your face and polish on you nails and toes and...
- [to Shawn]
- Cory Matthews: Stop looking at her toes.
- Shawn Hunter: [Entranced] But they sparkle!
- Cory Matthews: [to Topanga] I want the name of the guy who did this to you!
- Topanga Lawrence: My stylist's name is Mr. Cellini. Cory, it's just a haircut, it's just some makeup. It's not gonna change me.
- [Checks watch]
- Topanga Lawrence: Gotta go.
- [Begins walking away]
- Cory Matthews: Well, where are you going?
- Topanga Lawrence: This outfit with this hair? Hello? Buh-bye, I am *so* at the mall.
- Cory Matthews: When I get a haircut, it looks terrible for... the first six weeks. Then it looks great for, like, a day. Then it's time for another haircut.