Blackadder II (TV Series)
Bells (1986)
Rowan Atkinson: Edmund Blackadder
Photos
Quotes
-
Lord Percy Percy : I'd like to meet the Spaniard who can make his way past me.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Well, go to Spain; there are millions of them
-
Blackadder : I seek information about a Wisewoman.
Young Crone : Ah, the Wisewoman... the Wisewoman.
Blackadder : Yes, the Wisewoman.
Young Crone : Two things, my lord, must thee know of the Wisewoman. First, she is... a woman. And second, she is...
Blackadder : Wise?
Young Crone : You do know her then?
Blackadder : No, just a wild stab in the dark which is, incidentally, what you'll be getting if you don't start being a bit more helpful. Do you know where she lives?
Young Crone : Of course.
Blackadder : Where?
Young Crone : Here. Do you have an appointment?
Blackadder : No.
Young Crone : Well, you can go in anyway.
Blackadder : Thank you young crone. Here is a purse of moneys... which I'm not going to give to you.
-
Doctor Leech : It isn't every day a man wakes up to discover he's a screaming bender with no more right to live on God's clean Earth than a weasel. Ashamed of yourself?
Blackadder : Not really, no.
Doctor Leech : Bloody Hell. I would be. Still, why should I complain. Just leaves more rampant totty for us real men, eh?
Blackadder : Look, am I paying for this abuse or is it extra?
Doctor Leech : No, no, it's all part of the service.
-
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Aah, and who is Jane?
Lord Percy Percy : I'm sworn to secrecy. Torture me, kill me, you shall never know.
[Blackadder kicks him in the gonads]
Lord Percy Percy : Ooh, ouch... Jane Herrington. We're very much in love, my lord.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : This is *the* Jane Herrington?
Lord Percy Percy : Yes.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Jane "bury-me-in-a-Y-shaped-coffin" Herrington.
Lord Percy Percy : I... , I think maybe there are two Jane Herringtons.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : No... Tall, blond, elegant?
Lord Percy Percy : Right, that's right.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Goes like a privy door when the plague comes down?
-
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Well young man, you've got yourself a job. What do they call you?
Kate : Kate.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Isn't that a bit of a... girl's name?
Kate : Oh it's, erm, short for, erm... Bob.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Bob?
Kate : Yes.
Lord Edmund Blackadder : Well, Bob, welcome on board.