- Barbara Gordon: Would any of you care for a soft drink?
- Batman: No thank you, Miss Gordon, we might find it too relaxing.
- Robin: I've never seen that light flash before?
- Batman: Well, that's the Batcomputer's Bat-resistance signal.
- [suddenly has a revelation]
- Batman: Of course it doesn't understand our question about Commissioner Gordon. It can't answer it. Commissioner Gordon represents law and order. The Batcomputer is programmed to deal only with criminals!
- Robin: Holy one-track-Batcomputer-mind!
- Alfred: [under the Siren's spell, Commissioner Gordon has stowed away in the Batmobile after which it returned to the Batcave] Commissioner Gordon, what are you doing here?
- Commissioner Gordon: You? You're Alfred, Millionaire Bruce Wayne's butler. And that voice! The same nameless voice that often answers the Batphone.
- Alfred: I'm afraid you're making a mistake, sir.
- Commissioner Gordon: Mistake? Nonsense! Obviously this is the Batcave... Ergo Batman is Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson is Robin the Boy Wonder. Hmm hmm!
- The Siren: [having just incapacitated Commissioner Gordon into discovering Batman's true identity, via her hypnotic high note, Siren intends putting Bruce Wayne in the same condition, and obtaining his fortune. She doesn't know that he is also Batman] My next move is to relieve Mr. Wayne of his fabulous fortune. With Batman revealed by Commissioner Gordon, and, thus, permanently impaired, and with Bruce Wayne's millions in my posession, I'll be unstoppable!
- The Siren: [playing the harp] Batman and Robin, you're finished, I say, for hidden inside of your car, Commissioner Gordon is lurking and soon, he'll tell me whoever you are!
- [giggles]
- The Siren: [after using her stunning siren spell on Chief O'Hara through the telephone] Go jump in Gotham Park lake!
- [giggles wickedly]
- Robin: Your goose, so to speak, is cooked!
- The Siren: Not by a long shot, short stuff. I now own this building.
- Robin: Is that true, Mr. Wayne?
- Bruce Wayne: [under the Siren's stunning spell] She now owns this building.
- Batgirl: Oh, Bruce, if only you were more like Batman.
- Bruce Wayne: [still under the Siren's stunning spell] Batman...
- Batgirl: Perhaps then you would have had the strength to resist the Siren's stunning spell.
- The Penguin: Lulu! Speak to me, Lulu!
- Lola Lasagne: Don't call me Lulu, Pengy. It's Señora Lola Lasagna now.
- Narrator: [narrating] What's on Barbara's mind, Charlie? Is she about to go into action as that domino dare-doll, Batgirl?
- Batgirl theme singers: [singing] Batgirl, Batgirl. Batgirl, Batgirl. Where do you come from, where do you go? What is your scene, baby, we just gotta know. Batgirl, Batgirl. Batgirl, Batgirl. Are you a chick who fell in from outer space? Or are you real with a tender warm embrace? Yeah... whose baby are you? Batgirl, Batgirl. Batgirl, Batgirl. Yeah... whose baby are you? Batgirl!
- The Siren: [during the fight between her men and Robin and Batgirl, the Siren has been knocked off a rooftop and is holding onto the ledge for her life, with Robin holding her wrists] Help me! Help!
- [gasps]
- Robin: Why should I? You were willing to let Bruce Wayne leap!
- The Siren: Oh, c-can we talk about this after you pull me up?
- Robin: Can you get Mr. Wayne out of that spell?
- The Siren: I... I...
- Robin: [raises voice] Can you?
- The Siren: [moans] I might try singing an antidote note...
- Robin: Then do it!
- The Siren: Oh, but that's three octaves above high C! Nobody's ever done it before! My voice would be gone! I'd rather die!
- [Robin lets go of her wrists]
- The Siren: [desperate] I'd rather live!