Little Louie Groovy: Look, if your here to rob me, I ought to warn ya that I'm a karate expert and I can hurt ya. So stay back!
[takes a stance]
Little Louie Groovy: Heeya!
Catwoman: [to henchmen] Karate isn't effective unless accompanied by yelling. Let him howl until he springs a vocal cord, then get him!
Barbara Gordon: [walking into the Commissioner's office to find Batman, Robin, Commissioner Gordon, and Chief O'Hara lying on the floor to avoid the bullets from Catwoman's gun] Did somebody lose a contact lens?
Commissioner Gordon: Get down, Barbara!
The Joker: Oh, I have to give you credit, Catwoman. I expected this place to be a shambles because of a fight.
Batman: [Batman & Robin arrive on the scene] As it may yet be, Joker!
The Joker: Found us you have and get you we will. Get them boys!
Batman: [reading a message attached to a dart] This one was just a warning, Batman. The next one will be between your eyelids.
Commissioner Gordon: Any signature?
Batman: Signed: a well-wisher.
Chief O'Hara: Well, it seems like somebody is interested in your welfare.
The Joker: [Catwoman drives up to the recently released Joker in her Catmobile] You want a lift, big boy?
The Joker: Make it look good Catwoman, pull a gun on me the way we planned. They're probably watching us.
Catwoman: [draws cat gun] Get in this car or I'll blow whatever little brains you have, out!
The Joker: [puts up his arms] She's kidnapping me, honest!
Narrator: [narrating] And at the Sleazy Hotel, a sleazy hotel across the street from Police Headquarters...
Robin: That scrap of paper, Batman, it's gone!
Batman: Yes, Batgirl slipped it into her belt when she thought I wasn't looking.
Robin: You think she's trying to double cross us?
Batman: No, but she's a woman, Robin, with a woman's inborn desire to outsmart men.
Batman: [Batgirl has just saved the lives of Batman & Robin in the nick of time] What took you so long, Batgirl?
Batgirl: Rush hour traffic, plus all the lights were against me. And you wouldn't have wanted me to speed, would you?
Robin: Your good driving habits almost cost us our lives!
Batman: Rules are rules, Robin. But... you do have a point.
Warden Crichton: [the Joker is being released from prison early owing to good behavior] Well, with this, eh, ten dollar bill, we hope you will seek a new life on the outside. One replete with good citizenship and fine deeds.
The Joker: [handling the bill he's just been handed] Ten dollars, hm? I used to light my cigars with ten dollar bills, heh!