Hayley Smith: [Hayley is dating Bullock, Stan's boss] I came over here after the party, we started talking, and... you know. And besides, he has a huge...
Stanley Smith: Penis. Haley! Damn.
Hayley Smith: I was going to say "heart" but... well, you saw his shoes.
Avery Bullock: [Avery is currently Riding on the back of Stan Smith like a horse] Woah, Nelly! Slow down, Smith!
Avery Bullock: Thanks for the ride, Smith. I owe you a sugar cube.
Bullock: May I have some Gatorade? I'm afraid I left all my electrolytes with your daughter.
[Bullock has maimed Jeff]
Hayley Smith: Dad! Do something!
Stanley Smith: [to waitress] So what, exactly, is a "frittata"?
Hayley Smith: Dad!
Stanley Smith: Hey, I'm hungry! This man rode me like an animal for three hours. Do you have ANY idea what that's like?
Hayley Smith: [pause; Hayley glares at him]
Stanley Smith: And now I'm not hungry.
Hayley Smith: If all the CIA is at this picnic, who's out there undermining democracy?
Stanley Smith: The FBI pulls a double shift.
Stanley Smith: [after swallowing a self-destructing letter] I'm pooping blood tonight.
Francine Smith: Honestly, Stan, what does Hayley have to do with you getting a promotion. It should be enough that you're really good at your job.
Stanley Smith: Yeah, it should. But we don't live in Shouldland. Ah, Shouldland! Where clean-cut kids cruise Shouldland Boulevard and the Shouldland High football team get their optimistic asses kicked by their crosstown rival, Reality Check Tech.