The bodies of the recently dead are coming back to life, and they are hungry, for fresh meat! For one young "tabloid" news reporter it is the story of a lifetime. For everyone else it is ...
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The bodies of the recently dead are coming back to life, and they are hungry, for fresh meat! For one young "tabloid" news reporter it is the story of a lifetime. For everyone else it is hell on earth. What will there fate hold for them? Will they make it out alive? Or will they all be Zombie lunch? Written by
"Zombie Dawn" is based on the idea that global war, along with destroying much of civilization, unleashed some sort of biological agent that turns people into zombies. Special teams are sent into the ruins of man's cities (and suburbs) to find and rescue survivors. Unfortunately, the areas are infested with zombies. Sounds impressive, like a cross between Newt's saga in "Aliens" and "Day of the Dead." Well, the truth is that three men in black clothing run through a dark building, yelling, "Go, go, go!" and shooting zombies. Two of them expend what must be over two hundred rounds from their carbines to bring down just one walking dead. Three soldiers - with no night vision, effective weapons, or radios. Not even a reaction force to help bail them out of a jam. Anybody want to name three things that the military knows about small unit tactics? Firepower. Communications. Teamwork. I could go on, but writing an essay is probably unnecessary.
By the way, if the world is ever overrun with zombies and you need advice, come see me.
"Them Damn Zombies" opens with Cleatus looking for his dog. He wanders through the dark woods, calling to the hound. One of the things he says is something to the effect of, "You had better not be in those chickens again." Since he is in the middle of nowhere, I suspect the word "chickens" was added to make him seem even more redneck. Anyway, Cleatus finally spots his dog, though it is being eaten by three zombies. To make a short story even shorter, Dan and Billy meet Cleatus in time to hear him gurgle out his last breath. They bundle him up in some old linen and go back to hunting.
Elsewhere, the three girls (Jessica, Tiffany, and Heather) are driving, uh, somewhere. Briefly they hear Peter's newscast on the radio, but the obvious mayhem going on is less interesting than gossip. The girls serenely continue their trip while we are suddenly subjected to Peter and Red. Exactly what Peter is reporting on is never explained; unless, "People are running around and screaming. Scientists have some theories." counts. Thankfully, Red pulls up in his van and drags the news crew along with him on a zombie hunt.
I am intrigued by the idea of hunting zombies. To be specific, the idea of using lures or decoys. No need to paint wooden people when you could take an individual that you do not like and tie them to a post. The half-wit starts screaming, the zombies stagger toward him, and I get some target practice. If I run out of ammo or take too long reloading and the zombies eat my bait... ...well, there are a number of people I dislike. Time to be more careful when I get down to the last schmuck.
Eventually, the girls are driving along a seriously rural road (as in two tire ruts with weeds growing up between). A man staggers along in the middle of the track, angering Jessica. Things happen quickly; literally within seconds the following occurs: zombies attack the car, Heather is bitten, night falls, and it starts raining. A little later Heather attacks Tiffany, which prompts a whole new round of screaming before Red arrives and starts shooting zombies. The assemblage makes a run for Red's hunting shack, though a stray zombie encounter deprives the redneck of his firearm.
The remaining cast, including Dan and Billy, gathers in the plywood shelter. This is partially to allow for some Peter bashing (nobody likes him), but it also provides for a sudden awakening in the morning. Dan, Billy, Red, and Peter all become a balanced part of the zombies' breakfast. Larry completely disappears (he pops up again at the end), leaving Jessica and Tiffany to run scared through the woods. Ultimately, the girls get fed up and have a "girls kick butt" scene. Then the movie ends and yes, the conclusion feels as abrupt as I make it sound.
My number one complaint is that the script is held together by the thinnest of threads in several places. Peter has no idea about what he is reporting on, besides people screaming while running back and forth across an empty field. Two of the rednecks find their brother dying of severe trauma to the neck and go back to hunting. And the group of girls... ...they have absolutely no purpose. They do not know why they are here. I do not know why they are here. I will not even get into the characters discussion about not knowing what is going on. Mind you, this was after they arrived at the shack. Red had already used the word "zombies" about twenty times and Larry had taped Red shooting zombies when they rescued the girls. It was as if this scene was the first shot during filming and nobody had read the script beforehand. Another explanation is mass, simultaneous amnesia.
Time to stop thinking about this. The best analogy would be if you told me that two plus two was five and here I am, trying to prove the theorem.
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