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Sleeping Dogs Lie (2006) Poster

(I) (2006)

Quotes

[first lines]

Amy: My name is Any and, yes, at college I blew my dog.

Amy: Anyone here besides me know what canine semen tastes like?

Amy: Men are insecure enough about their penises. There's no need to bring the whole animal kingdom into it.

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John: Whatever happened to your dog?

Amy: I gave him away.

John: Why?

Amy: He got too big.

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John: When I was a boy and I first played with myself, first time I came I thought I broke my bits.

Amy: [laughing] How old were you?

John: I was twenty.

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John: Tell me a secret. Tell me the weirdest thing you've ever done, something that you wouldn't tell anybody.

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Amy: I had never had sex with Linda or any other woman. The idea of sex without a penis is like a sandwich without the meat.

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Ed: Hey, um, what do you like most about teaching.

Amy: Hmm. I would have to say... the microwave food.

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John: Calm down, Steve. Find your own bitch.

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[Mom hugs John but sniffs and wrinkles up her nose]

John: Oh, that's me. I smoke.

Mom: No, I smell feces.

John: OH, FUCK!

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John: I have blue balls.

Amy: Is it my sexy nightgown?

John: Tents make me horny.

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Amy: Why don't you go talk to him?

John: Not now. He's got an axe.

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Amy: You wrestled another woman in your underwear while Elvis beat off... and you didn't even get laid?

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Amy: You're not hard.

John: I will be. Just shut up and kiss me.

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Amy: I have a confession to make.

John: You're a dude?

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Ed: That's it. I'm done with women. They're evil. You know, I'd be gay if it wasn't for the sex thing.

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Randy: Oh, yeah, hey, uh, my mom made this casserole and wanted me to bring it over to ya.

Amy: Oh... well, thank you.

Randy: Uh-huh. Bounced around in my truck a little bit. Should be okay. It smells like ass but... probably doesn't... taste like it.

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Randy: You look really pretty when you're sad.

Amy: You, too.

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Amy: You have a nice penis.

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Dad: Who is THIS offending beast?

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Amy: [voiceover] It's important to lie. It's trying to live up to the lies that we tell about ourselves that makes us better people.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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