In the ironically named city of Paradise, a recently laid-off loser teams up with his cult-leading uncle to steal a peculiar bounty of riches from their local amusement park; somehow, the recently arrived Taliban have a similar focus, but a far more sinister intent.
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A political satire set in Turaqistan, a country occupied by an American private corporation run by a former US Vice-President. In an effort to monopolize the opportunities the war-torn ... See full summary »
After being set-up and betrayed by the man who hired him to assassinate a Texas Senator, an ex-Federale launches a brutal rampage of revenge against his former boss.
Every seven years in an unsuspecting town, The Tournament takes place. A battle royale between 30 of the world's deadliest assassins. The last man standing receiving the $10,000,000 cash ... See full summary »
When his mentor is taken captive, a retired member of Britain's Elite Special Air Service is forced into action. His mission: kill three assassins dispatched by their cunning leader.
A weak con man panics when he learns he's going to prison for fraud. He hires a mysterious martial arts guru who helps transform him into a martial arts expert who can fight off inmates who want to hurt or love him.
Director:
Rob Schneider
Stars:
Rob Schneider,
David Carradine,
Jennifer Morrison
A stranger named Silas flees from a devastating storm and finds refuge with Tom and Gillian on their farm. While struggling with the Storm, Silas seems to be the only one who can help Tom ... See full summary »
The story begins with a regular Joe who tries desperately to seek employment, but embarks on a violent rampage when he teams up with cult leader Uncle Dave. Their first act is to heist an amusement park, only to learn that the Taliban are planning the same heist as well. Chaos ensues, and now the Postal Dude must not only take on terrorists but political figures as well. Written by
cgw@mac.com
Rated R for extremely crude humor throughout, including strong sexuality, graphic nudity, violence, and for pervasive language and some drug use| See all certifications »
On the UK release DVD there is a typo on the blurb which is meant to read 'first they must fail'. Instead it reads 'first they most foil'. See more »
Quotes
[first lines]
Asif:
Congratulations, Nabi. We are at the doorstep of our martyrdom.
Nabi:
Praise Allah.
Asif:
Praise him! Soon, we will be greeted by Allah, the one true god... and by the cheers of our Four Fathers... and by ninety-nine perfect virgins who will worship us... for ALL eternity!
Nabi:
[pause]
I thought it was one hundred.
Asif:
What's that?
Nabi:
One hundred virgins. They promised me one hundred.
Asif:
Ninety-nine, one hundred. What's the difference?
Nabi:
If they're telling you one thing and they're telling me another, maybe ...
[...] See more »
"Brace Yourself"
Written by Anthony Lee, Steve Lindsey & John D. Lee
Performed by DNA & John D. Lee
Published by Westside Independent Music Publsihing See more »
This is Uwe Boll's best film to date. That being said, it's still crap. Abundant plot holes, crudely forced shock tactics, a shallow attempt at satire, and the worst director in the entire world are just the tip of the iceberg on why this movie blows. I hate Boll's work. I hate his belligerence. He should not be allowed near a camera.
The ultimate question, however, is did I laugh? Yes. In spite of everything , I laughed. This movie is Uwe Boll's "F*^# you!" statement to the world. He's going to continue making movies whether we like it or not, and he's actually a lot better at crude humor than any sort of horror, adaptation or whatever random dung heap genre he sticks his nose into. He even makes fun of himself in this movie during a cameo between him and the actual creator of the postal franchise. For some weird reason, I respect that.
Zack Ward was fantastic, and really should be getting better work. This may be a rare time when an actors participation in a Boll film didn't herald their imminent career death. He proved himself to be an adequate action actor, and I'm hoping this gets him some publicity. The same cannot be said for Verne Troyer or Dave Foley, who are circling the drain. (I still laughed though.)
Is it worth the price of admission? Nope, but it's so much closer than any of Boll's films have ever been. Boll may be a deluded, stubborn and angry man,(at the Q&A he explained to us in a very serious tone, how postal was a gutsy, intelligent satire) and his work may be awful, but Boll genuinely loves films and wants to make them. He wants to get better and who knows? Maybe one day Boll will produce something worthwhile. Tasteless director John Waters invented Hairspray, which was thought to be impossible. Maybe Boll will one day harness his ambition towards film-making in a productive way. Or not. Who cares?
You shouldn't see postal if you have an option, but if you don't, you might giggle a few times, in spite of yourself. However, if you're a moron, you'll love it!
-Max
P.S: Boll has always clashed with wheelchair-bound "AintItCool" news leader, Harry Knowles. They don't get along at all. Why do I reference this? There is a mentally challenged character in the movie who begs for money from the seat of a motorized wheelchair. Can you guess his first name?
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This is Uwe Boll's best film to date. That being said, it's still crap. Abundant plot holes, crudely forced shock tactics, a shallow attempt at satire, and the worst director in the entire world are just the tip of the iceberg on why this movie blows. I hate Boll's work. I hate his belligerence. He should not be allowed near a camera.
The ultimate question, however, is did I laugh? Yes. In spite of everything , I laughed. This movie is Uwe Boll's "F*^# you!" statement to the world. He's going to continue making movies whether we like it or not, and he's actually a lot better at crude humor than any sort of horror, adaptation or whatever random dung heap genre he sticks his nose into. He even makes fun of himself in this movie during a cameo between him and the actual creator of the postal franchise. For some weird reason, I respect that.
Zack Ward was fantastic, and really should be getting better work. This may be a rare time when an actors participation in a Boll film didn't herald their imminent career death. He proved himself to be an adequate action actor, and I'm hoping this gets him some publicity. The same cannot be said for Verne Troyer or Dave Foley, who are circling the drain. (I still laughed though.)
Is it worth the price of admission? Nope, but it's so much closer than any of Boll's films have ever been. Boll may be a deluded, stubborn and angry man,(at the Q&A he explained to us in a very serious tone, how postal was a gutsy, intelligent satire) and his work may be awful, but Boll genuinely loves films and wants to make them. He wants to get better and who knows? Maybe one day Boll will produce something worthwhile. Tasteless director John Waters invented Hairspray, which was thought to be impossible. Maybe Boll will one day harness his ambition towards film-making in a productive way. Or not. Who cares?
You shouldn't see postal if you have an option, but if you don't, you might giggle a few times, in spite of yourself. However, if you're a moron, you'll love it!
-Max
P.S: Boll has always clashed with wheelchair-bound "AintItCool" news leader, Harry Knowles. They don't get along at all. Why do I reference this? There is a mentally challenged character in the movie who begs for money from the seat of a motorized wheelchair. Can you guess his first name?