7.5/10
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30 user 19 critic

Pirates (2005)

Swash and unbuckle. In 1763, the Caribbean is awash in pirates. The worst is Stagnetti, backed by his bloodthirsty first mate, Serena. He wants the Scepter of Inca, which gives its owner ... See full summary »

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(screen story), (screenplay)
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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Jules Steel
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Isabella Valenzuela
...
Serena
...
Madelyn
...
Christina
...
...
Capt. Victor Stagnetti
Kris Slater ...
Manuel Valenzuela
...
Angelina
...
Pirate Dancer
...
Marco
Nhan ...
Frank Bukkwyd ...
Oxford
Brian Surewood ...
Gino
Harry Bali ...
Priest
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Storyline

Swash and unbuckle. In 1763, the Caribbean is awash in pirates. The worst is Stagnetti, backed by his bloodthirsty first mate, Serena. He wants the Scepter of Inca, which gives its owner great powers. To remove it from remote Calaveras Island, he needs the Dagger of Ataljuapa as well as the aid of a descendant of the family to whom the Scepter was entrusted. So, he kidnaps Manuel Valenzuela, honeymooning with the lovely Isabella. On Stagnetti's trail are pirate hunters, Captain Edward Reynolds and Jules, his commander. Edward's a bit clueless, but he does rescue Isabella. Once Stagnetti has the Dagger, the stage is set for the clash of good and evil. Written by <jhailey@hotmail.com>

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Genres:

Adult | Adventure

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for strong sexual content, nudity and language | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

Official Sites:

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

26 September 2005 (USA)  »

Also Known As:

Pirates XXX  »

Filming Locations:

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Box Office

Budget:

$1,000,000 (estimated)
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Company Credits

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Technical Specs

Runtime:

| (R Rated)

Sound Mix:

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

1.78 : 1
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Did You Know?

Trivia

Some scenes were filmed aboard the HMS Bounty, at The Pier in St. Petersburg, Florida. The city of St. Petersburg, which owns The Pier, did not realize that the film was porn; the producers represented the film as a PG-13-level comedy for television. See more »

Quotes

Capt. Edward Reynolds: Fuck that shit, run!
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Connections

Referenced in Entourage: Three's Company (2006) See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

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User Reviews

 
Beyond compare...
25 June 2006 | by See all my reviews

As far as porn goes, it was great. I don't think anyone will say differently. It's just so ridiculously hilarious. I love how half way through the film, Evan Stone turns into a clueless Captain Kirk. And they ask SO much of the audience. A girl gets kidnapped, she's tied to a chair, forced to have sex with a gypsy, and ends up liking it. I can follow that, no problem. But there's a scene where the captain and his first mate are tied up in a room that's on fire. Then a woman from a previous scene comes in and says that she'll only untie them if the captain makes love to her. So she unties him and he "makes love". Hello? Punch the crazy broad in the face and get out of the building. You don't have time for a sex scene. But there were a few good parts. Take when anyone is about to get it on. There's a little kissing, and BAM! There's a screen push and they're naked. And probably my favorite part, the amount of violence in the girl/girl scenes. At one point I thought it had turned into Ultamite Fighter. And there was another point were some candles are used in a way that I never really thought of before. All in all, you need to see this. I mean, how often do you get to see a porno with a seven figure budget?


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