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MaryAnn’s quick take… A beach-slap to anyone with a brain. Embodies everything that is wrong with Hollywood today. It is proudly dumb. It is proudly sexist. It is proudly pointless. I’m “biast” (pro): nothing
I’m “biast” (con): nothing
(what is this about? see my critic’s minifesto)
These are the shoals upon which critics are broken. Those gently susurrating waves? The bastard power of water to wear everything down. Those lovely soft grains of sand on the beach? Every one of them a thoughtful film lover who has dedicated her- or himself to considering cinema, now ground down into a tiny tiny pebble.
Baywatch is a beach-slap fuck-you to anyone with a brain. Your gonads may be engaged if you are a heterosexual man (or a homosexual woman, though that will be accidental) who has not graduated from a tween sexuality in which disembodied boobs »
- MaryAnn Johanson
Welcome back to the Weekend Warrior, your weekly look at the new movies hitting theaters this weekend, and to paraphrase those renowned seventies scholars the Brady Bunch, “When it’s time to change then it’s time to change.”
While I’ve tried my hardest to slowly sneak those changes in, it’s gotten to the point where we’ll need to do something more drastic if the few of you reading the Weekend Warrior on a weekly basis actually want it to remain coming to you on a weekly basis. Because of that, we’re going to try something different by not throwing in as much independent limited releases for those checking the column out, and making the column a little more focused at least for the time being. (I’m probably going to move reviews for my Top Picks over to my blog, which is easy enough to »
- Edward Douglas
After a successful first weekend at the box office, The Boss Baby, an animated comedy from DreamWorks Animation, had no trouble repeating at the box office. The hit movie went up against Warner Bros.' comedy remake Going in Style, Sony's animated adventure Smurfs: The Lost Village and PureFlix's faith-based drama The Case For Christ. None of these new releases stood a chance, with The Boss Baby repeating atop the box office with $26.3 million, followed closely by Disney's blockbuster Beauty and the Beast with $25 million.
Box Office Mojo reports that Smurfs: The Lost Village, Sony's new fully animated movie in the beloved franchise, opened in 3,610 theaters, debuting in third place with $14 million for a meager $3,882 per-screen average. Going in Style debuted in 3,061 theaters in fourth place with $12.5 million with a $4,084 per-screen average, while The Case for Christ opened in 10th place with $3.9 million. Smurfs: The Lost Village and Going In Style weren't critically acclaimed, »
Smurfs: The Lost Village takes our favorite mushroom dwellers on a new, purely animated adventure. Neil Patrick Harris and Hank Azaria are not popping up here. The film sends a strong girl power message in vivid CGI. The Lost Village is aimed like a laser at young, kindergarten aged children. There are no double entendres or sly references meant for adults. The target audience will be entertained, the parents not as much; unless they're dipping into the mushrooms as well.
It's a regular, happy day in Smurf Village when Smurfette (Demi Lovato) faces an existential crisis. Brainy (Danny Pudi) makes a device that captures your smurfiness; translated, smurf essence. It works marvelously on Hefty (Joe Manganiello) and Clumsy (Jack McBrayer), but draws a blank on Smurfette. What is she really about? What defines her character? She's the only girl, but created by Gargamel (Rainn Wilson) to trap the Smurfs. Smurfette's »
“Tra-la-lalala”A simple tune that quickly transformed into an earwig which burrowed into the brains of a generation (“Generation X” to be more precise). Yes, it’s the rallying song of that big, blue behemoth of kid-friendly franchises, the Smurfs. Those petite (three apples high) magical imps were introduced by Belgian cartoonist Peyo (Aka Pierre Colliford) way, way back in 1958. They were a merchandising phenom in Europe, but didn’t truly achieve worldwide superstar status until they descended on the Us thanks to TV cartoon titans Bill Hanna and Joe Barbara (the creators of The Flintstones and Scooby Doo also co-wrote that too-catchy theme song with Hoyt Curtin) and became the anchor for NBC’s Saturday morning line-up in 1981 through 1989. Tons of toys and imitations (remember the Snorks?) followed, but things were quiet in their hidden spot in the magic forest for the next twenty years or so. And then »
- Jim Batts
For centuries, humankind has been vexed by one question above all others: Do Smurfs have sex? Some, such as noted scholar Donald Darko, say that Peyo’s iconic blue gnomes are asexual beings who lack reproductive organs altogether. Others contend that Smurfette — the only Smurf who identifies as female — is solely responsible for breeding future generations, although that argument obviously fails to account for the Smurfs that predated her. Canonically, it’s understood that a fleet of storks deliver baby Smurfs to Smurf Village whenever there’s a blue moon; that sounds a bit suspect, so far as these theories go, but it has the added benefit of being easily explained to young children.
I regret to inform you, dear reader, that “Smurfs: The Lost Village” does not put to bed the matter of how these tiny creatures procreate. On the contrary, this creatively vacant animated reboot — a perilous half-step »
- David Ehrlich
The Fate of the Furious, Free Fire, Phoenix Forgotten and more movies you need to see this April The Fate of the Furious, Free Fire, Phoenix Forgotten and more movies you need to see this April Adriana Floridia4/6/2017 9:26:00 Am
It's April now, which means it's rainy, gloomy, and you may want a cozy place to escape to. Lucky for us, there are a bunch of great movies opening at Cineplex this month that you'll definitely want to see.
There's a grand variety of films to choose from--including monster movies, dystopian thrillers, family dramas, and found footage horror films. Check out our list of the eleven movies you need to watch this April!
Release Date: April 7th
See it with: Family
- Adriana Floridia
When it comes to movies about the Belgian cartoonist Peyo’s diminutive, liberty-cap-wearing, blue-skinned Schtroumpfs (or Smurfs, as well call them), being “good enough” means exceeding all expectations. Their first, Peyo-directed cinematic outing, released in this country as The Smurfs And The Magic Flute, is notable only for a song score that The Umbrellas Of Cherbourg’s Michel Legrand seemed to have composed in the midst of a mental breakdown; the decades-later attempts to turn the mushroom-dwelling humanoids into a Hollywood live-action franchise, in The Smurfs and The Smurfs 2, are simply dire. But now comes Smurfs: The Lost Village, an inoffensive children’s film with an above-average voice cast, competent animation, and no product placement. This is enough to make it the finest film ever made about the Smurfs.
- Ignatiy Vishnevetsky
Traditionally, April has never been one of the biggest months to open a movie, but that all changed a few years ago when the Fast & Furious franchise started finding success in the spring months. The next installment in that high-octane franchise, The Fate of the Furious, doesn't hit theaters until April 14, but this weekend, moviegoers will have three new films arriving in wide release, Sony's animated adventure Smurfs: The Lost Village, Warner Bros.' comedy remake Going In Style and PureFlix's The Case For Christ. None of these will (probably) be able to stop last weekend's winner, The Boss Baby, which will likely repeat atop the box office with $25.2 million.
Box Office Mojo reports that Smurfs: The Lost Village, which marks the franchise's return to fully animated movies, instead of live-action/CGI hybrids, is expected to open in roughly 3,400 theaters, with Going in Style estimated to open in 3,000 theaters, while »
Now that we objectified male actors for a change, let’s dive deep into Baywatch, a Seth Gordon film that’s set to be released on May 28 of this year. Judging just from Gordon’s previous work on Horrible Bosses and Identity Thief, it looks funny, and it looks good.
Move over David Hasselhoff! Dwayne Johnson takes over his role as Mitch Buchanan, the super hunky main lifeguard who now has to deal with a new recruit, Matt Brody, and his sporadic ways. Originally played by David Charvet in the television series, this new lifeguard is, surprise, played by Zac Efron. Together, the two must learn to overcome their differences after they find some underground crime ring that could potentially destroy the Bay.
- Catherina Gioino
If you go with your family to see “Smurfs: The Lost Village” (and let’s be honest: most of today’s animated features are more than suitable for adults only, but anyone who would go to this movie without children is seriously starved for entertainment), you’ll get to experience the trailer for “The Emoji Movie,” an upcoming feature from the same studio, Sony Pictures Animation. The trailer is hosted by an emoji named Meh, voiced in the morose observational tones of comedian Steven Wright; in just 30 seconds, he makes not being overly enthusiastic about anything seem the apex of hilarity. I won’t prejudge the film, but it’s a stupendous trailer.
- Owen Gleiberman
Smurfs: The Lost Village, 2017.
Directed by Kelly Asbury.
Featuring the voice talents of Demi Lovato, Rainn Wilson, Joe Manganiello, Jack McBrayer, Danny Pudi, Mandy Patinkin, Julia Roberts, Michelle Rodriguez, Ellie Kemper, Ariel Winter, Meghan Trainor, Gordon Ramsey, Jake Johnson, Tituss Burgess, Gabriel Iglesias, Jeff Dunham, and Kelly Asbury.
A mysterious map sets Smurfette and her fellow Smurfs Brainy, Clumsy, and Hefty on an exciting race through the Forbidden Forest leading to the discovery of the biggest secret in Smurf history.
A brief recap on the last Smurfs movie: Neil Patrick Harris portrayed a New York ad executive who had difficulty in embracing his father-in-law’s buffoonish yet kind-hearted behaviour. Meanwhile, Gargamel, portrayed by Hank Azaria, was a celebrity sorcerer residing in France but knew his magical abilities would cease to be, and that we would have to extract the essence of the Smurfs to retain his powers. Meanwhile, The Smurfs »
- Matthew Lee
Berto Colon (Orange Is the New Black) has booked a series-regular role opposite Meaghan Rath in The Trustee, ABC's comedic one-hour pilot from The Smurfs writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn, Warner Bros TV and Elizabeth Banks and Max Handelman's studio-based Brownstone Productions. Written by Scherick and Ronn and directed by Michael Engler, The Trustee is described as a fun, female buddy cop comedy about Eliza Radley (Rath), a driven but stubborn detective who finds… »
L. Scott Caldwell (Mercy Street) has booked a series-regular role opposite Meaghan Rath and Laverne Cox in The Trustee, ABC's comedic one-hour pilot from The Smurfs writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn, Warner Bros TV and Elizabeth Banks and Max Handelman's studio-based Brownstone Productions. Written by Scherick and Ronn and directed by Michael Engler, The Trustee is described as a fun, female buddy cop comedy about Eliza Radley (Rath), a driven but stubborn detective who… »
The Mentalist alum Tim Kang is set for series-regular role opposite Meaghan Rath and Laverne Cox in The Trustee, ABC's comedic one-hour pilot from The Smurfs writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn, Warner Bros TV and Elizabeth Banks and Max Handelman's studio-based Brownstone Productions. Written by Scherick and Ronn and directed by Michael Engler, The Trustee is described as a fun, female buddy-cop comedy about Eliza Radley (Rath), a driven but stubborn detective who finds… »
David Warshofsky has booked a series-regular role opposite Meaghan Rath and Laverne Cox in The Trustee, ABC's comedic one-hour pilot from The Smurfs writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn, Warner Bros TV and Elizabeth Banks and Max Handelman's studio-based Brownstone Productions. Written by Scherick and Ronn and directed by Michael Engler, The Trustee is described as a fun, female buddy cop comedy about Eliza Radley (Rath), a driven but stubborn detective who finds unlikely… »
So after two mediocre-to-terrible live-action adaptations (save Hank Azaria's performance as Gargamel) where The Smurfs go to New York and Paris for some reason, they are rebooting the franchise and making an all-cg animated feature with an all-new cast. This includes Danny Pudi as Brainy, Jack McBrayer as Clumsy, Demi Lovato as Smurfette (replacing previous singer-turned-voice actress... Read More »
- Damion Damaske
Sleepy Hollow alum Lance Gross has booked a series regular role opposite Meaghan Rath in The Trustee, ABC's comedic one-hour pilot from The Smurfs writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn, Warner Bros. TV and Elizabeth Banks and Max Handelman's studio-based Brownstone Productions. Written by Scherick and Ronn and directed by Michael Engler, The Trustee is described as a fun, female buddy cop comedy about Eliza Radley (Rath), a driven but stubborn detective who finds unlikely… »
Check out all the photos from Smurfs: The Lost Village stopover in St. Louis.
Clumsy and Papa Smurf visited some special kids at St. Louis Children’s Hospital.
After that, they attended the St. Louis Science Science Center’s First Friday and crashed Harry Potter’s party!
On Saturday, Clumsy and Papa stopped by the HealthWorks! Kids Museum where they were able to get a fun lesson in personal health. Papa even raided the kitchen and whipped up some of his famous SmurfBerry yogurt.
There’s still time to catch the Smurfs at The Magic House on Sunday, March 5th from 11:30 to 2Pm before they leave St. Louis and head out on their quest for The Lost Village!
See the full list of cities Here.
There will »
- Movie Geeks
Author: Zehra Phelan
Another year and yet another all-new take on an animation, this time in the form of those adorable blue creatures. The Smurfs are taking us on another adventure, leaving their ‘magic mushroom’ houses behind to venture into the ‘wilderness’, riding on bunnies with a whole host of risqué jokes that are thrown in for the poor parents who will be made to take their offspring.
Related: Smurfs: The Lost Village Trailer
On board for the Sony Pictures Animation adventure caper is singer Demi Lovato, Rainn Wilson voicing Gargamel (The American, The Office), Joe Manganiello voicing Hefty (Magic Mike, Spiderman), Jack McBrayer voicing Clumsy (Wreck-It Ralph), Danny Pudi voicing Brainy (Captain America: The Winter Soldier) with Mandy Patinkin (Homeland) voicing Papa Smurf.
If you know nothing of the Smurfs, have you been living under a rock? Those who grew up in the 80’s would spend their Saturday mornings »
- Zehra Phelan
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