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The Cottage
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Reviews & Ratings for
The Cottage More at IMDbPro »

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Index 78 reviews in total 

41 out of 58 people found the following review useful:

Serkis in undeniably the star of this film

7/10
Author: jess-154 from england
12 February 2008

Director Paul Andrew Williams wanted to "write a film that cost no money and was all set in one place". And the first sixty or so minutes stuck to this agenda pretty well; Two brothers kidnap the daughter (Jennifer Ellison) of a wealthy man, he sends out two crazy Chinese guys to kill them, nerdy brother Peter (Reece Shearsmith) looses the all important mobile phone and older hard-man brother David (Andy Serkis) swears a lot, all in the confines of a deserted cottage. The dialogue is just about snappy enough to keep this interesting. Not much to be said for the camera work – but it does kinda add to the atmosphere. And then they end up in another cottage and the blood bath begins.

It's pretty obvious why they cast Ellison: she has big bouncy boobs and her harsh liverpoodlian accent is juxtaposed perfectly with her blonde hair and Barbie doll face. No one really cares that her script rarely ventures beyond words too rude to publish here – the camera generally focuses on her chest/backside with the occasional headbut thrown in. Shame really; I was hoping she'd amaze us all with her diverse acting talent, but I guess it's a case of you can take the girl out of Brookside but you won't get an amazing actress out of a soap star.

Serkis in undeniably the star of this film. The perfect gangster with a heart, his sincerity and charm kept me watching throughout. I'm not entirely sure why he chose to do The Cottage – perhaps, like me, he was hoping this would be one of those rare things; a funny independent British comedy. But unfortunately it just felt like Williams had taken The Chain Sore Massacre and Hot Fuzz, cut out the best bits, stuck the leftovers in a blender and then forgot to cook it properly.

By all means go see this if you like blood, guts and rolling heads, just don't expect any intellect in the script.

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35 out of 52 people found the following review useful:

Well worth a visit!

8/10
Author: Superbeasto from United Kingdom
24 February 2008

British horror movies have always had a unique sense of humour, with "Severance" being a good recent example of savvy brit film-makers throwing laughs and gore together to great effect. This carries on that tradition, and in Reece Shearsmith they're blessed with an actor whose comic chops are well up to scratch. Andy Serkis is no slouch either, playing the straight man brilliantly as a mobster who's hard as nails but a little fuzzy on the inside.

The laughs are pretty reliable, and as the situation goes from bad to worse a lot of those laughs come from the (severe) misfortune of the poor souls on screen, and the blend of splatter and slapstick is well tuned. Jennifer Ellison does grate after a while, her constant use of swearing amusing at times but often a little irritating. Still, she has a fantastic body on her and that ball shrivellingly tough accent to fall back on, so her presence isn't entirely unwelcome. As a comedy it works extremely well, and as a gore movie there's some inventively wince-inducing moments, and with the balance just right "The Cottage" is well worth a visit.

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26 out of 38 people found the following review useful:

Horrific fun! Reece Shearsmith shines in excellent black comedy

8/10
Author: LittleScarletBlue from United Kingdom
5 February 2008

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

'The Cottage' is an intriguing, genre mixing film, full of twists and turns - an exhilarating 90 minutes. Its gory and funny but one that anchors the splatter comedy to deftly drawn characters enduring a heightened reality one hell of a night.

The nightmarish black comic horror is skillfully delivered, with the gorefest conventions given a darkly comic twist. The film's tongue-in-cheek exuberance humorously balances the grisly nature of the horrific injuries that are inflicted on screen.

What makes 'The Cottage' so distinctive is the unusual approach it takes for a film where a gore infested climax is the pay off. At the heart of the film, and what makes the film stand out for me, is the emotional investment in the two main characters. You really do end up caring what happens to its key protagonists, the brothers David and Peter.

There is an emotional depth about them that made me wish even more time could have been spent with the pair, their arguments and interplay, exploring their relationship and its bickering background.

The relationship between the brothers, brilliantly played by Andy Serkis and Reece Shearsmith, is a highlight of the film. Their fraught fraternal relationship has a believability about it which grabs you from the moment they appear on screen & the scenes between them crackle with tension, humour and emotion.

Serkis's character is one used to being in control, but his tough, hard streetwise nature is under pressure almost immediately as the kidnapping plan begins to unravel, giving way to repressed anger and growing frustration.

Although Andy Serkis's David is forced out of his comfort zone as the plot unfolds, Reece Shearsmith's Peter is out of his depth from the start, reluctantly brought into a world he knows nothing about and ill equipped to deal with it at any level. His timidity is accompanied by a moralising disapproval of his brother.

Into this mix are thrown two more characters, the kidnapped Tracey and her black sheep stepbrother Andrew (nicely played by Jennifer Ellison and Steven O'Donnell) They are the natural comic grotesques of the movie, hindering and exasperating by extreme measures, a contrasting comic counterpoint to the carefully delineated characters of David and Peter. Much of the comedy comes from the dynamics of their enforced relationship and how they react to the ever worsening situation they find themselves thrust into.

Both the quarrelsome brothers are superbly played, but Reece Shearsmith is truly outstanding. His performance is beautifully nuanced with great comic timing and skillful characterisation. Peter is by turns wimpish, pernickety, argumentative, pathetic, vulnerable. He's hilariously yet tragically out his depth. Shearsmith's performance really holds the film together - it's brilliantly subtle and multi-layered. He brings so much to the role, not only comedically but emotionally too. He gives the film its heart, its pathos.

The bloody battlefield climax at the farmhouse sees the gory finale delivered with aplomb - the comedy and horror unfold with beautiful pace and precision.

Even here, amid the bloodletting, there is a moment of the unexpected and unusual which makes 'The Cottage' stand out. Its a low key, almost poetic scene which seals a growing understanding between the brothers. The badly injured pair contemplate their demise as they look up at a star filled night sky. Its a moment of humanity amid the carnage, sad and touching because its a hoped for reconciliation that will never happen.

'The Cottage' is a very entertaining blending of comedy and horror with a depth not usually associated with the genre and its directed with real confidence and verve.

There is a sense of sadness in the midst of the horrific fun of 'The Cottage' which lingers in the memory afterwards because its central characters matter and you care what happens to them - a rarity for the horror genre which marks the film out.

Its original approach, well evoked atmosphere, at times comically and bloody surreal , the blackly ironic pitch and top notch performances by the two leads, especially a brilliant Reece Shearsmith, make 'The Cottage' a comedy horror whose genre blending works a memorable treat!

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16 out of 22 people found the following review useful:

It's a comedy with bite, right to the end.

7/10
Author: JohnRouseMerriottChard from United Kingdom
14 April 2008

Two brothers, David & Peter, kidnap Tracey, the daughter of local tough guy gangster Arnie, they hold her to ransom for the sum of £100,000. What they hadn't bargained into the equation is that Tracey is one tough feisty lady, and that a turn of events will lead them to something far more scary than big bad gangster Arnie.

This is the second feature from director Paul Andrew Williams, and bearing in mind that his debut effort was the highly lauded gritty drama London To Brighton, it's no surprise to find that some folk are a little bemused as to the genre splicing nature of The Cottage. The Cottage is far more in keeping with Christopher Smith's 2006 horror comedy, Severance, and certainly it wouldn't be out of place as a double bill with that criminally undervalued picture.

Very much a film of two halves, this picture is likely to prove a very divisive piece, and it will {has} only find an audience based on word of mouth alone, you will be hard pressed to find any sort of press marketing that will prepare you for the type of genre fusion film you are getting. Already, based on the comments written on this site thus far, you can see that some people were confused {or annoyed} by the tonal shift for the second half of the film. The first half sees poles apart brothers, David & Peter swapping comedy dialogue as they whisk thru a number of exchanges and circumstances with the marvellously volatile Tracey. Whilst the second part of the picture hits you over the head with a quick switch to horror formula that has catering fulfilment for the gore junkies amongst us. And this is where the problem lays with many, why didn't the film stay as a kidnap farce,? why didn't it set its stall out to be a horror film from the off,? There is no denying that the films high points come with the horror moments, but the film is first and foremost a comedy from the first reel to the cheeky end of credits sequence. And as deliciously sick as the gore shift is, The Cottage never once takes its tongue out of its bloody cheek. It's obvious that Paul Andrew Williams is having fun here and he hopes his audience will as well. View it as an all encompassing comedy/horror/thriller in that order and you wont go far wrong.

Andy Serkis plays David, the tough brother of the two, with Serkis doing a wonderful line in both visual and vocal comedy. This benefits Reece Shearsmith as Peter, a character so far under the thumb he can barely be seen. Shearsmith feeds of Serkis to seal the comedy deal of this odd brotherly couple. British tabloid fave Jennifer Ellison plays Tracey, literally swearing for England to have the audience divided as to if they want her to survive or not! But it's a gutsy show from her and one hopes she ventures into this territory a bit more often. There is nothing new or fresh here, and this wont win any awards even in its homeland of England, but it is FUN, and it shows a director clearly intent on making films from different genres. 7/10

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18 out of 26 people found the following review useful:

Mindless, twisted mayhem!

6/10
Author: shady402 from West Midlands, England
27 April 2008

The best way to sum up this film is 'interesting...!' The violence, blood and gore is fantastic. If you want to see people decapitated and hacked to bits and want to laugh at the same time, this recent British horror comedy is definitely for you. The main characters are fun, likable and witty, Andy Serkis is fantastic, the dialogue is hilarious and the film is just entertaining from start to finish.

However, the storyline is quite simply all over the place. It's an incoherent mess to be exact! The film just twists and turns in different directions raising a number of questions, which it then leaves unanswered. Characters and subplots are introduced and then forgotten about. However, I'm guessing most people would not want to see this for the plot so if you just want some mindless, gory fun, go and see this.

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12 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

Well regardless of the IMDb score i thought it was a good film.

8/10
Author: postmanvendetta from United Kingdom
15 March 2008

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Original no. Tasteful no. But this film is still worth seeing. The films plot line revolves around a wannabe gangster, his sissy brother and a big fat dumb bloke, kidnapping this big gangsters daughter in order to hold her off for a ransom of 100,000 pounds. However things go terribly wrong and eventually after a slow but subtly funny beginning (the two brothers act it out like a bickering married couple and the fat dumb bloke cant help but to make you smile) the main characters stumble across this cottage hosted by a deformed, demented farmer who in many cringe-worthy ways (i.e heads getting split in 2 by garden spades) picks them off. Like i said it was never going to win awards for originality, but i laughed at this film in the same way i did to Shaun of the dead, which to me makes it worhty for at least one viewing, but people who love black comedies (like me) will definitely want to see this again. YWNA

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15 out of 24 people found the following review useful:

Cannot decide what it wants to be

5/10
Author: seawalker from Birmingham, England
19 March 2008

You might say that "The Cottage" has opened to less than stellar reviews in the UK. Frankly, this is a slight understatement. The truth of the matter is that "The Cottage" has opened to stinkingly bad reviews in the UK. Just terrible write ups.

Part of the issue the UK critics seem to have with "The Cottage" is that Director Paul Andrew Williams decided to follow up his low budget, gritty, violent and critically lauded thriller "London To Brighton", with a pretty generic horror film. I don't mind that so much. In fact I kind of admire it. As a film fan I see all kinds of films. I would imagine that any film Director started off at some point as a film fan and, as such, would like to have a crack at making all kinds of films. If "The Cottage" had been a masterpiece then it wouldn't have mattered, would it? Just another Director working in a different genre.

Sadly, "The Cottage" is not a masterpiece. Far from it. Slapstick horror is very difficult to pull off, and "The Cottage" does not come close, but it is not the total flop you might think it would be from reading the reviews. I think the problem with "The Cottage" is that it cannot decide what it wants to be. Knockabout kidnapping comedy or knockabout horror comedy? It is a bit of both, but not enough of either. Sad to say it, but all of the best bits are all in the trailer.

Andy Serkis and Reece Shearsmith are fine as the bickering, mismatched brothers and kidnappers: Andy Serkis permanently grumpy and frustrated, Reece Shearsmith, jumpy, under the thumb and a sufferer of Mottephobia. (You can look it up.) Boobilicious, lads mag favourite Jennifer Ellison as the tough as nails kidnap victim was a bit disappointing. I was expecting a lot more from her and didn't get it. Not nearly an energetic enough performance.

I went to see "The Cottage" with my Brother. I got a one word review from him. Sh*t. Maybe that says it all?

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6 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

The Cottage from HELLarious

9/10
Author: atinder from United Kingdom
16 September 2009

I heard a lot good reviews about movie on Horror sites, i could not wait check out.

I did not think I would like but BUT I Bloodly LOVED it at the end This movie start where two men who are brothers David and Peter have kidnap Tracey.

Peter and David get Tracey who is unconscious from the car boot. As they take her upstairs Peter gets then start look at her chest not realising that she's woke up. She head butts him several times and Peter screams and then David manages to get her off him and has to fix Peter's now as a bloody and broken nose after tying her to the bed.

Start of movie is really funny and it not gory or scary but then turns around half into movie, when it get really gory and it's bit scary.

I didn't expect to be as gory as it was and I did find the killer Scary for a horror comedy movie, it great killer well done with the great Make up effects, it was really good.

This one of best horror movies to come out last year 9/10

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10 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

thoughts such as "for better or worse" comes to mind

6/10
Author: beregic (beregic@msn.com) from Canada
17 May 2008

i guess i should call it a sarcastic horror-comedy show with "vintage" elements. it actually starts as a kidnapping thriller and ends up as a "traditional" horror. only the last 30 minutes could be considered as "horror".

a few things must be said. the pace of the movie is slow and sometimes very slow. but if you keep that in mind and you are in mood for some "dark" comedy you might as well enjoy it as i did.compared to "Shaun of the Dead" is not as funny but a bit more scarier. something to watch out of boredom and it might entertain you in that case( like when you busy with something else and need a background distraction that WILL get at least a few "gigs" out of you). overall i was not disappointed.this feature is missing a defined plot and i am not sure what that "point" would have been here( or could have), other then some really funny sarcastic jokes and some gore.

the main actor to watch here is Andy Serkis as one of the 2 brothers and the mastermind before the kidnapping.he does some great acting when everything goes wrong and it is quiet funny to watch him deal with his naturally idiotic brother( which at one point even personalizes Hitler, literally, but the character does not seem to be aware of that). there are also a few other characters but they not contribute much to the plot except for the "bad" one. the soundtrack is actually excellent in creating those horror "vintage" moods.

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13 out of 21 people found the following review useful:

absolutely hilarious movie!!!

10/10
Author: peter whitty from United Kingdom
5 May 2008

I loved this movie, it is definitely my favourite film I have seen this year. I wasn't expecting much as I can't stand Jennifer Ellison, but I was pleasantly surprised. Firstly the first half of the film is funny as hell then the 2nd half is gory as hell but done in a comedy way. The acting is absolutely superb and even I must admit Ellison was perfectly cast even if she did use the "F" word a few too many times. Andy serkis stole the show for me, I didn't know he could act without making stupid noises (Lord of the rings) or being dressed as a 10ft ape (king kong) but in this he is very funny without the CGI. All in all I would recommend this film who doesn't take films too seriously.

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