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The Cottage (2008)

Unrated | | Comedy, Crime, Horror | 14 March 2008 (UK)
In a remote part of the countryside, a bungled kidnapping turns into a living nightmare for four central characters when they cross paths with a psychopathic farmer and all hell breaks ... See full summary »
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Cast

Complete credited cast:
...
...
...
...
Andrew
James Bierman ...
Bouncer
Cat Meacher ...
Club Receptionist
...
Man in Suit
Logan Wong ...
Muk Li San
Jonathan Chan-Pensley ...
Chun Yo Fu
Simon Schatzberger ...
Steven
...
Villager with Dog
...
The Farmer (as David Legeno)
Katy Murphy ...
Farmer's Wife
...
Farmer's Daughter 1
Eden Watson ...
Farmer's Daughter 2
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Storyline

In a remote part of the countryside, a bungled kidnapping turns into a living nightmare for four central characters when they cross paths with a psychopathic farmer and all hell breaks loose. Written by Anonymous

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

Sleeps six bloody comfortably.


Certificate:

Unrated | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

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Details

Official Sites:

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Language:

Release Date:

14 March 2008 (UK)  »

Also Known As:

Bienvenue au cottage  »

Filming Locations:

 »

Box Office

Budget:

£2,500,000 (estimated)

Opening Weekend:

£303,072 (UK) (14 March 2008)
 »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
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Did You Know?

Trivia

According to director Williams, Tracey was originally written as a 40-year-old character but, to get the finance, he was told to cast someone young. See more »

Goofs

When David returns from the Public telephone In the village the Alarm Is blaring out and lights flashing on one of the cars. David runs Into the house with the alarm still sounding but a few seconds later the alarm mysteriously switches Itself off. See more »

Quotes

David: She alright?
Peter: She's still unconscious.
David: That's chlorophyll for you.
See more »

Crazy Credits

Stay till the very end of the credits for an additional scene. See more »

Connections

References The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

See more (Spoiler Alert!) »

User Reviews

 
Cannot decide what it wants to be
19 March 2008 | by (Birmingham, England) – See all my reviews

You might say that "The Cottage" has opened to less than stellar reviews in the UK. Frankly, this is a slight understatement. The truth of the matter is that "The Cottage" has opened to stinkingly bad reviews in the UK. Just terrible write ups.

Part of the issue the UK critics seem to have with "The Cottage" is that Director Paul Andrew Williams decided to follow up his low budget, gritty, violent and critically lauded thriller "London To Brighton", with a pretty generic horror film. I don't mind that so much. In fact I kind of admire it. As a film fan I see all kinds of films. I would imagine that any film Director started off at some point as a film fan and, as such, would like to have a crack at making all kinds of films. If "The Cottage" had been a masterpiece then it wouldn't have mattered, would it? Just another Director working in a different genre.

Sadly, "The Cottage" is not a masterpiece. Far from it. Slapstick horror is very difficult to pull off, and "The Cottage" does not come close, but it is not the total flop you might think it would be from reading the reviews. I think the problem with "The Cottage" is that it cannot decide what it wants to be. Knockabout kidnapping comedy or knockabout horror comedy? It is a bit of both, but not enough of either. Sad to say it, but all of the best bits are all in the trailer.

Andy Serkis and Reece Shearsmith are fine as the bickering, mismatched brothers and kidnappers: Andy Serkis permanently grumpy and frustrated, Reece Shearsmith, jumpy, under the thumb and a sufferer of Mottephobia. (You can look it up.) Boobilicious, lads mag favourite Jennifer Ellison as the tough as nails kidnap victim was a bit disappointing. I was expecting a lot more from her and didn't get it. Not nearly an energetic enough performance.

I went to see "The Cottage" with my Brother. I got a one word review from him. Sh*t. Maybe that says it all?


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