Years after his parents are killed by a megalodon (an enormous shark that has supposedly been extinct for millions of years), Dr. Spencer is obsessed with the idea of hunting down and ... See full summary »
Antonio Sabato Jr.,
Grand L. Bush
A decidedly odd couple with ulterior motives convince Dr. Alan Grant to go to Isla Sorna (the second InGen dinosaur lab.), resulting in an unexpected landing...and unexpected new inhabitants on the island.
A small town, desperate to recover from hard economic times, is under threat when voracious Snakehead fish mutate and survive previous lake chemical poisonings. The fish transform from ... See full summary »
Jack Hall, paleoclimatologist for NORAD, must make a daring trek across America to reach his son, trapped in the cross-hairs of a sudden international storm which plunges the planet into a new Ice Age.
This movie is proof that our Army just isn't ready for a war against dinosaurs. And we should get ready, because terrorists around the world who have access to this fill now know our weakness. The guys in this movie shot so much led into the air i found myself wondering why some of it isn't raining down on them and killing them. So many of the characters were narrowly avoiding death and i hated them all so much that i started to make up fantasies in my head about cool ways they could die, their own bullets coming down being one of the best.
During the course of this 2005 summer blockbuster you see these peaceful winged dinosaurs get some really bad press. Now i myself have only once met a Pterodactly so i can't speak for all of them but what i do know is that they are not found of eating people. Don't believe me, you could always google it. They ate fish. They cannot fly fast enough to rip off a man's torso from his legs, and if their wing hit a guys head i assure you both the guy and the dactyl would be on the ground screaming together rather then the guy's head coming off. That aside, i really like it when people come apart in movies. As for the bullets, dinosaurs came from a time before bullets, they don't believe in such things. The power of belief kept them safe from man's weapons. That is one theory i have. The second one is that they had on bullet proof vests. The dinosaurs were terribly rendered so they could have been wearing dresses and it would have been a struggle to tell.
Why didn't i rate this a one you ask? I hope your asking cause i'm gunna tell you. Because Coolio is in it. Coolio is the only rapper turned actor i like in a movie. After watching his performance in Dracula 3,000 (see my review for that if you dare) i can't hate anything he touches. I take that back, i can hate them, cause i sure hated both this movie and Dracula 3000, but i won't ever rate one of his movies a 1.
So Don Rumsfeld, this movie better be playing 24/7 in the pentagon as a warning to you all... get ready for Muslim extremists riding unstoppable dactyls into things. Bullets can't stop them, nothing can. Nothing... except coolio.
41 of 62 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?