Josh: Did we come all the way to Europe to smoke pot?
Oli: Hey, I came all the way from Iceland.
Natalya: [after all the credits have rolled] I get a lot of money for you, and that makes you MY bitch.
Paxton: Do you see a single other person in here with a fucking fanny pack? Wait, there's a guy. Why don't you go over there and have fucking fanny back sex with him, and then you can jizz all over each others storage compartment?
[while in the torture chambers, Natalya laughs]
Paxton: You fucking whore. You fucking bitch, YOU FUCKING BITCH!
Natalya: I get a lot of money for you, and that makes you MY bitch.
Paxton: We can't rail a girl that's in a coma. I think that's illegal, even in Amsterdam.
Paxton: I don't want a drink. I want to see some art! Now, can we go?
Paxton: You made a reservation under "The King of Swing"?
Oli: Of course my horse.
Josh: [to Oli] Can't you keep your fucking Viking ass in your pants for two seconds?
[in the torture chamber]
Josh: Please! I have money! I'll fucking pay you! Ten times, two times - whatever you want!
The Dutch Businessman: Pay me?
The Dutch Businessman: No one is paying me. In fact, I'm the one paying THEM!
[last line BEFORE the end credits]
The Dutch Businessman: NO! PLEASE!
[Paxton executes the Dutchman]
Josh: You... Why?
The Dutch Businessman: I always wanted to be a surgeon. But the boards would not pass me. Can you guess why? You see? So I went into business. But business is so boring. You buy things you sell them, you make money you spend money. What kind of life is that? A surgeon, he holds the very essence of life in his hands - your life. He touches it.
The Dutch Businessman: He touches it. He has a relationship with it. He is part of it.
Josh: Please just let me go, please...
The Dutch Businessman: You want to go? Is that what you want?
Paxton: Excuse me, I uh... excuse me. How is it in there?
Man: [referring to the torture chamber] Be careful.
Paxton: Why's that?
Man: You could, spend ALL your money... in there.
Paxton: I hope bestiality is legal in Amsterdam, because that girl's a fuckin' hog.
Paxton: ...you need a fork there chief?
The Dutch Businessman: No. I prefer to use my hands. I believe people have lost their relationship with food. They do not think "this is something that died for me so that I would not go hungry." I like that connection with something you die for. I appreciate it more.
Paxton: Well I'm a vegetarian.
The Dutch Businessman: I am a meat-eater. It is human nature.
Paxton: Well I'm human and it's not my nature.
The Dutch Businessman: [to Josh] Tell me... what is your nature...?
[places his hand on Josh's leg]
Josh: WHOA! Don't touch! Don't fucking touch me!
The Dutch Businessman: [quickly gathering his things and moving out of the train compartment] Sorry, sorry...
Josh: [still very weirded out] Fucking freak! Jesus!
[Paxton and Oli both look at each-other and laugh hysterically]
Paxton: [laughing] Edward Saladhands just groped Josh!
Oli: [waving his fingers menacingly] Ooooooh...!
Paxton: [still laughing] Dude, you finally hooked up, that's awesome!
Josh: [still visibly pissed] Yeah, that's fucking hilarious.
The American Client: [heading to his victim] Who wants this motherfucker?
Oli: I'm the first in line for snípur.
Paxton: Oh, that's Icelandic for "clit".
Guard: Talk. Talk, speak!
Paxton: What the fuck do you want me to say?
The American Client: I've been all over the world. You know, I've been everywhere and the bottom line is: Pussy is pussy. You know, every strip club, every whore house, every... It's all the same shit. You know, I just fucked a girl two days ago and I don't even remember the color of her tits. But this... This is something you never forget, right? RIGHT?
The American Client: Never, right.
Josh: Did we come all the way to Europe just to smoke pot? We did that everyday when we were in college. Why don't we go check out a museum or something?