- Judge Alex: [to a litigant] ... You say it took 31 hours for 3 people to clean 1 house? I could have cleaned Chernobyl in that time!
- Judge: [repeated line, to his litigants] ... This courtroom is my house, and I *will* bounce you if you don't follow my rules!
- Judge: [to a litigant] If I was the cop who showed up on the scene, you'd still be in jail right now.
- Drew McMahon: Love is a messed up thing ya know.
- Judge Alex: I've got to tell you, it is the way you're doing it.
- Judge Alex: [to a litigant] ... I've sent fifteen-year-olds to prison. Not to Juvenile Hall, but to *State Prison*.