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Land of the Dead (2005) Poster

Quotes

[from trailer]

Kaufman: Zombies, man. They creep me out.

Kaufman: In a world where the dead are returning to life, the word "trouble" loses much of its meaning.

Kaufman: We do not negotiate with terrorists!

Charlie: What happened, Riley, did you get fucked?

Pillsbury: [Motown is hot-wiring a car] Yellow to red!

Motown: What the fuck does a Samoan know about hot-wiring a fucking car?

Pillsbury: 50,000 cars stolen in Samoa every year.

Motown: Well, a million in Detroit.

Pillsbury: Detroit has 50 million cars. Samoa, 50,000. Every one stolen.

[repeated line]

Kaufman: You have no right!

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[last lines]

Riley: Take us north.

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Charlie: Nice shooting.

Riley: Good shooting, Charlie. No such thing as nice shooting.

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Kaufman: [talking about Cholo] You're dead. You really are *dead*!

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Arena Policeman: What the hell is going on here?

Riley: Someone shot the little fat man.

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Manolete: [about the rapidly adapting zombies] Do you really think they can cross the river?

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Mike: It's like a bad dream.

Charlie: I have bad dreams. Hell, yes. Just look at me, you can tell I have terrible dreams.

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Slack: [talking about Riley] You take care of him, huh?

Charlie: Hell, yeah. He pulled me out of the fire. It was bad... Just look at me, you can tell it was bad.

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Cholo: Looks like God left the phone off the hook.

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'High Noon' Soldier: Stench, high noon.

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Mike: They're pretending to be alive...

Riley: Isn't that what we're doing? Pretending to be alive?

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Riley: [about the fireworks] Put some flowers in the graveyard.

Charlie: Put some flowers in the graveyard. How come you call them that, Riley? I don't get it. There here ain't the kind of flowers you lay on the ground, these here are sky flowers. Way up in heaven...

Riley: That's why I love you, Charlie, 'cause you still believe in heaven.

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Pillsbury: I came here to do something. So, we are gonna stand around, or we are gonna do something?

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Slack: Charlie, why do you lick your rifle?

Charlie: Catches the light.

Slack: What light? How can you see anything?

Charlie: Good eye.

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Cholo: [a shot is fired] What the hell's that?

Brubaker: Oh, that's just target practice.

[scene cuts to soldiers]

Veteran Soldier: There's nothing there, man.

[he's attacked by Big Daddy and screams]

Cholo: OK, so what the hell's that, screaming practice?

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Slack: What's your story, Riley?

Riley: I don't have one, nothing bad ever happened to me.

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Charlie: [to Slack] Riley likes to be alone. He might take me, because he says being with me is just like being alone.

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Cholo: How many times have I told you, Riley, stop banging chicks with more problems than you.

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Riley: [Slack shoots open the door, startling him] What the fuck are you doing?

Slack: I'm making myself useful!

Riley: [gets attacked by a zombie] *Now* shoot!

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Cholo: [Riley shows up] You were always the smart one, Riley, much smarter than me.

Riley: [under his breath] Not saying much.

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Cholo: [to Mouse] There are three things a man must do alone - be born, die and, well, we all know the other one.

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Riley: Make sure she doesn't hurt herself.

Slack: I can take care of myself, ok?

Riley: Fine. Charlie, make sure she doesn't hurt anyone else.

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Kaufman: [Kaufman gets in his private underground limo, while his driver opens the garage door] Careful when you open that door.

[Big Daddy appears, and attempts to get into the limo. His driver sees this, and runs out the garage door, leaving Kaufman in the limo]

Kaufman: Get back here, you bastard! You've got the fucking keys!

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Kaufman: [Kaufman gets in his private underground limo, while his driver opens the garage door] Careful when you open that door.

[Big Daddy appears, and attempts to get into the limo. His driver sees this, and runs out the garage door, leaving Kaufman in the limo]

Kaufman: Get back here, you son of a bitch! You've got the fucking keys!

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Kaufman: [as Cholo approaches from the shadows] Fucking Spic bastard!

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[as Kaufman walks out of the elevator with two bags in his hands]

Board Member: What's in the bags?

Kaufman: Money.

Board Member: Whose money?

[Kaufman reaches for his gun]

Kaufman: Watch out, Get down! Quick!

[pulls him down and shoots him]

Kaufman: ...Ours.

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Puppeteer: [beating up another puppet] Take that, you smelly zombie!

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Foxy: [diplomatically] It's Denbo and his idiot.

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Foxy: [Cholo is bitten by a zombie and Foxy hold a gun aimed at him] It's your call man.

Cholo: [hesitates then shakes his head no] Nah, I always wanted to see how the other half lives.

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Cholo: Still workin' for the man. Kaufman send you to kill me, huh?

Riley: Yes.

Cholo: Takes a true friend to stab you right in the front, doesn't it.

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Charlie: [repeated line; referring to the number of bullets he carries] I don't usually need that many.

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Slack: [referring to Charlie] He thinks he's taking care of you.

Riley: He does. Without his guns I'd be dead by now.

Slack: Without you he'd be dead by now.

Riley: Fair trade.

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Riley: Put that thing away and put on your best Sunda smile. Just, just try to be friendly.

Charlie: I *am* friendly.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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