Greed (2006) Poster

(2006)

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3/10
Oh, and there's a guy with an axe running around as well ...
Coventry23 June 2013
I bought this miserable and ludicrous excuse for a motion picture as part of a three DVD box set named "The Ultimate Horror Collection". Now that's a joke! Not just because all three titles (this one together with something called "South of Hell" and "Sasquatch Hunters") are downright terrible movies, but also because this "Greed" can hardly even be considered as horror. It's more of an action/adventure thriller about a whole bunch of uninteresting people trying to get their filthy hands on a large sum of stolen money. And, oh yeah, coincidentally there's also a guy with an axe butchering everyone as well. As shallow and childish as it may sound, the only remotely good reason to give this lousy flick a go is because the main actresses Andrea Bogart and – particularly – Darlene Tejeiro are parading around in tight sportive outfits the entire movie. And it just has to be said that Tejeiro has a beautiful pair of big round breasts. These ladies depict two friends out on an adventurous rock-climbing trip. When they stop for a rest in the bar of the handsome bartender Robert, the girls are harassed and threatened by a vicious gang of bikers. You can tell these dudes are bad to the bone, because they wear leather outfits and have tattoos, yet they're driving dirt bikes, ha! Our jezebels flee and accidentally recover the $300.000 loot, which makes them a luscious prey for a whole bunch of people. Meanwhile, the deranged axe-wielding killer Ivan escaped from prison and seemingly has a score to settle with many of the thugs that are chasing our wenches. Admittedly this sounds like a convoluted and ambitious plot, but it's all a bunch of derivative and clichéd nonsense instead. Literally every character in the film is a either a greedy double-crossing weasel or a selfish backstabber (hence the title, I presume) and the dialogs and shootouts are incredibly inept. There are way too many idiotic sequences, like the chase between a station wagon and a quad, and despite of the massive body count there's never any suspenseful moment or imaginative killing. The psychopath is apparently even more indestructible than Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers combined, as he cheerfully stands back up after being hit by car, shot numerous times and fallen from large heights. Oh well, it doesn't matter, since I will solely remember Darlene Tejeiro's tight black top.
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2/10
Axe
Scarecrow-8829 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Raven(Darlena Tejeiro) & Ashley(Andrea Bogart)just stopped into a bar after hiking a nearby mountain and run into a nasty group of bikers led by TJ(Thomas Crnkovich who overplays the raspy voice and just doesn't provide much menace as the head biker of a band of motorcycle baddies). Stealing one of the gang's motorcycles, Raven and Ashley get run off the road and have to walk on foot after evading the bikers trying to catch them. They found a money bag containing stolen loot which belongs to the sheriff(the corrupt sheriff who gets a cut of a stolen 300 thousand lifted from a location not specified). At a decrepit flea-bag inn, they catch a few zzzz's before TJ and his gang run up on the owner of the establishment, Ned(Joe Goodrich)and his employee, Doug(Stephen Ferguson). TJ wants his loot and Ned decides the money should line his pockets so a shoot-out presumes. What none of the characters know is that an escaped loony, nicknamed the "Axeman"(Tim Sitarz)is on the rampage chopping anyone to pieces he comes in contact with. You have the owner of a bar, Robert(Jason London)who also conspired with Ned for the money. Everyone, including the heroines, want that damn money which results in nearly an entire cast wasted until a few survivors remain.

Ivan, The Axeman is a ridiculous unstoppable killing machine who is stabbed numerous times, shot in the back numerous times, pinned to a stone wall by a truck going really fast, & even falls off a mountain..yet, he still keeps coming! London is dreadful as Robert, the turncoat who seems friendly and courteous but is anything but. In a minor sub-plot, we follow the sheriff(Nathan Anderson;the one looking for the loot that is supposed to be his share)and Ivan's psychologist, Margaret(Fiona Loewi)as they are trying to find Ivan. Bogart is smokin' as Ashley, wearing barely little(exposing her incredibly sculpted figure)and Tejeiro as the main heroine Raven is quite cut as well. They are VERY easy on the eyes and might provide enough motivation to waste your time. No-budget stinker with poorly staged axe-murders. Most hilarious scene..Raven and Ashley, driving a station wagon, can not outrun Ivan who is chasing them on a four-wheeler!
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3/10
*yawns*
Zbigniew_Krycsiwiki15 March 2008
Two girls, returning from a climbing trip, have a bit of a run in at gun point with a biker gang on dirt bikes in a bar which looks like it's someone's garage. They steal their dirt bikes and end up on the run. The biker gang gives chase, because the dirt bike the girls have stolen from them has a whopping six thousand dollars in stolen money hidden in a pouch (where the money came from isn't explained, or maybe it just wasn't interesting enough to remember?) Somehow this all ties in with an escaped killer called the AxeMan, who is also after the few thousand dollars the girls unknowingly have in their possession. The main biker is a Ted Nugent lookalike with a silly voice, the "biker" gang rides dirt bikes, people are shot with no obvious effects other than having to wear a small bandage, and guns which reload themselves are all on tap in this no budget Z-movie. The climactic chase has the fat, bald, sweater wearing axe killer chasing the girls on a glorified riding mower- oooh, now that's scary.

This is nothing more than a 1960s biker movie plot, crossed with a female exploitation movie, with traces of a horror movie, which looks like its screenplay was found after it sat in a trash can for the past 40 years, and updated on a minuscule budget. It's too low budget to be a good action movie, but not unintentionally bad enough to be enjoyable in a "so bad it's good" way. Watching Darlena Tejeiro's bouncy tits was probably the highlight of this otherwise unwatchable flick, but there's not enough skin shown either. A big disappointment all around, and a confusing one as well, with too many characters and unanswered questions for its own good.
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Pretty much gives you what you'd expect and a bit more.
rixrex22 June 2007
You can find this in a bargain bin as AXE on DVD, like I did, for $3 or so, and it's not a bad buy. It's a quasi-horror film with action sequences, and a rather interesting plot with a lot of twists and turns. Enough to keep you guessing, sort of, and a few pretty good shock moments. Some really decent acting and some just ordinary, but nothing terrible, and you won't finish it by being bored for sure. The maniacal axe murderer is not developed as well as I'd like, probably due to so many other plot contrivances that left little time. Some fairly unbelievable resurrections, but nothing less than any other slasher film has had. The killer is pretty scary, but would have been better with a little more mania, and a little less visibility. There's not really anyone here who is wholesome, just varying degrees of corruption, which makes this like one of those quirky noir-style films of recent times.
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1/10
The greatest dirt bike gang ever.
Lord-of-Delusion11 October 2006
That's what you get with this movie. That's about all you get with this movie. I am not kidding when I say that two damsels in distress get harassed at a dive bar by a gang (leather jackets, motor-huckle boots, you name it) that has driven up to the bar. On dirt bikes! A hahahahahahahaha! Oh man, I have to give credit where it's due, because when this scene unfolded before my eyes, it was the equivalent of cinemtic masturbatory bliss! I have never laughed so hard in my life! Oh, you also get ATV chases, more dirt bikes, rock climbing, and some escaped ape of a dude who goes around "axing" people. Seriously, if you have somehow stumbled upon the hell which is this movie, watch it just for that scene alone. You'll dig it, man! Hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!
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1/10
Would you like some cliché horror with your skin show?
beatfu24 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Well, if so, have I got a film for you! Actually, even you won't like it. Because this movie is bad. Not bad like week old milk, bad like genocide. Bad like finding out that everyone you have ever loved was murdered by your dog because you gave it rabies. Bad like the Hantavirus.

I hope that gives you an idea of what I'm talking about. I can deal with crappy movies. I can watch underworld 2, so I'm pretty immune to it, but this movie takes crap to a whole new level. First off, the "Main Characters" are mentally deficient ex-porn actresses who happen to ride motorcycles. Or rock climb. Or, I don't know, flirt with each other. That's all they really seem to do. They meet and become fast friends. Then these 90 pound girls insult some bikers. "Action" ensues. Basically, you find out that these girls will steal money, but not motorcycles, because they walk to a hotel. From there they spend the rest of the movie with pretty much no clothes on.

There is horror in this movie, but it's more from the realization that those hillbillies from the beginning were probably related then from the actual story. There is an escaped blah blah blah, evil, blah, scary, blah, probably cries himself to sleep at night. He has a bad nickname. He kills with axes, or whatever is presented to him. He survives being hit by a car. He is just big. That's how scary he is. Big. Right.

So, he chases them, they try to get some money from some bar tenders and hillbillies, they run from bikers. A cop sleeps with a councilor while she leaves the kids at home. All while being painfully aware of their own level of incredible cheese. The actors, minus that one guy who you kind of recognize, are not actors at all. They are the retarded droppings of a Los Angeles nightclub; in other words, they all worked in the "Independent Film" industry before this. Or, at least, they wish they had the talent to work in the "Independent Film" industry. They are so bad.

Combine this with some of the most horrible script, directing, "music", and action scenes ever created, along with the fact that the story is complete tripe, and you get one of the worst movies ever made. Ever. In the entire history of movies. Do not watch it. Do not look at it. Go home and burn a piece of paper with the name of the movie on it in effigy, and then bathe yourself for even associating with the title of this piece of crap.
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1/10
Just another terrible indie film...
kalamazoo10114 October 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This is such a bad movie that it doesn't even warrant a full review. It seems like all the bad indie films in the past 10 years have used the same formula: several opposing groups fighting each other over money. This film is no different than the rest, except for the fact that it may be worse.

In one scene, the two lead actresses are being chased by a biker gang. But I guess the production couldn't afford actual Harleys so dirt bikes were used instead. A dirt bike gang wearing full leather and hitting the bars? Hahahaha! The scenes with the crooked sheriff were very cringe worthy, especially the part where he (rather fake) hits some guy with his (toy) Beretta.

Don't waste your time watching this. It's amazing that the filmmakers actually got funding for this movie.
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3/10
Is it horror or a thriller?
lastliberal31 March 2008
Warning: Spoilers
It is a story of an ax murderer that escaped from death row. That is why it says Axe on the DVD cover. I guess that wasn't good enough when it was released in 2004, so they renamed it and brought it out again in 2006 as a story of greedy people after $300,000.

POSSIBLE SPOILER: Everyone, and I do mean everyone, in the movie is after the money.

This coulda been a contenda. I spent the entire movie watching Darlena Tejeiro. I was absolutely enchanted with this beauty. She was a rock climber, but the best mountains in the movie remained covered in clouds, and we never saw the peaks. What a shame! But, I do have to say that she was the best actor in the movie. That doesn't mean I will watch Starsky & Hutch to see her again, but she was good.

The actual ax murders were pretty lame. This could have easily been a PG movie. More thriller than horror.
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5/10
Not as bad as it could have been.
MovieMilhouse2131 May 2010
Warning: Spoilers
With some of these horror flicks, you never really know what to expect. But with this one, I was pleasantly surprised. Obviously, what intrigued me first were the girls but I'm not complaining. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. The acting was, for the most part, was alright. The two girls were pretty consistent and Jason London was pretty good in both the "good guy" and the "bad guy" roles. The old man was just unpredictable. I mean, one moment he's rambling about something and then he seems like he's actually trying. The other thing that annoyed me were the sheriff and psychologist characters. They were completely pointless. It really annoys me when characters are thrown in just for the hell of it, especially when it's not even for the gratuitous nudity.

The plot was actually pretty good as well. The twist with Jason London was good, I can honestly say that I did not see that one coming. What did bother me was the Tom Savini impersonator and his biker gang that attempted to be menacing while on dirt bikes. I tried to give it the benefit of the doubt but it just didn't work. Maybe if it were a group of menacing teenagers it would be a little more believable.

The only thing that bothered me were the effects, special or otherwise. The punches and stabs and what not never seemed to line up quite right. And the whole "killer vision" gave me more of a sea sick feeling than anything else.

But all in all, the movie was not a total waste of time. Not too bad of a way to kill about an hour and a half.
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1/10
Super duper low budget that is the low equivilent of "No Country for..."
jordondave-2808512 June 2023
(2004) Axe/ Greed THRILLER/ HORROR

Super low budget and straight to rental version of "No Country For Old Men" centering on some stolen cash by a couple of biker girls of Raven (Darlena Tejeiro) and Ashley (Andrea Bogart) from a different bike, and the inhuman serial killer who cannot be killed who does whatever it takes to retrieve it, even if it means taking on the whole biker gang. Besides whatever I mentioned above from the movie that won the Coens Brothers some Oscars of "No Country...", it also makes use of the desert settings, back stabbings and the double crossings. And the serial killer, Ivan (Tim Sitarz) who cannot be killed, who looks like a Steve Austin look-a-like who just wavers an axe and for some reason, he cannot even be traced, regardless of the orange prison outfit he has on, whose also called the axe man. I felt dumb after watching this, theirs a realistic poorly photographed motorcycle chase that isn't going to come any more real than the bad acting and unconvincing fight scenes happening throughout.
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9/10
Campy and fun
moovefan18 March 2006
The movie begins with a brutal killing, as a killer on the loose is introduced, followed by the introduction of two sexy girls. Now that's a beginning in my book. Roger Corman would be proud. What follow is really not the traditional horror movie fare, as it becomes more of an action adventure featuring some cool chases with bikers, and a real campy chase between an ATV and a station wagon loaded with the hot female leads being chased by the loony killer. I found the film enormously entertaining, and appreciated the fact that the filmmakers did not take the film too seriously, as many of the horror/action films do. The film was funny at times, and the quirky characters added humor to the ever twisting plot. There are some unpredictable surprises that caught me of guard and I enjoyed the handling of the action scenes, especially the biker's chase. The rock climbing chase was unique, although I must admit, the girls acting was a bit below par, but at least they did not have to scream throughout the movie, like in so many of the films in that genre. It was a welcome surprises to see Jason London in a different type of role. The campy tone of the film was refreshing. An entertaining popcorn movie with a beer or coke chaser, depending on your age.
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9/10
Andrea Bogart in tight blue jeans: Fiona Loewi sizzles!
nb224 August 2006
Now this is a seriously decent thriller with a vicious, relentless bad guy:a sort of homicidal Energiser Bunny who weighs 280 pounds and whose brain has long since died. There is great deal of ax-work and lots of tension. Jessica Biel had a way of filling blue jeans in Texas Chainsaw Massacre and now please welcome slender, blonde Andrea Bogart whose nether cheeks are tightly packaged in a pair of size 0 low-rise snuggies and, in a couple of motel scenes, a pair of tight boy-shorts. In a supporting role, Fiona Loewi is extremely hot and shamefully underused even though she does bring the curtain down. Well worth buying or renting. Exciting and well-acted.
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10/10
Entertaining a la Corman
rcifilms-121 September 2006
I am not a big fan of horror films. This one is really different. It is a very campy approach to the horror genre. It is really more of an action film. I enjoyed the action, which was a lot of fun. I found the character to be very campy, and it seems like the director really had fun with it. It is not that gory. It seems like it is more suggestive in nature. I love Jason London. He plays a really different character here. Ned was my favorite character, and I also enjoyed the relationship between the two female leads. It reminds me of the old Roger Corman films, campy and a bit over the top. The story can not be taken too seriously, but what action/horror movie can be taken seriously...I had a great time watching it with my girlfriends...one of them is a climber too, so we had to listen to her and HER achievements after we watched the tape....that was a bit less fun, but still entertaining... Linda
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someone tell Jason London his career is almost done
darkstar-83 May 2005
so bad it hurts I guess that people go in life assuming certain things, in this case I can clearly believe this was supposed to be a "serial killer" movie but then in turns out it has also a gang of ruthless bikers (on motocross bikes), a chick who could be a fat version of Denise Richards and how makes funny faces running in her underwear, some great lines like "reedem yourself" and I keep asking why in the hell is Jason London in the movie *hell* I will offer him a better project. This is the kind of movies that makes me wonder that this film is just a complete waste of at least my time, anyway at least I got paid
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9/10
Better than it should be
slayrrr66611 June 2007
Warning: Spoilers
"Axe" is a really enjoyable and entertaining action-packed slasher.

**SPOILERS**

Preparing to get together, friends Ashley, (Andrea Bogart) and Raven, (Darlena Tejeiro) decide to go rock climbing, and stop off at a bar first. Meeting bartender Robert, (Jason London) who offers them a great location tip, but soon run afoul of T.J., (Thomas Crnkovich) and his biker gang, who chase them away into the hills. Managing to get away, they hear a report about an escaped convict on the loose named Ivan, (Tim Sitarz) who shows up at the same time as the biker gang. As they manage to survive that encounter, they realize they've been double-crossed and are still not out of danger. Getting all the lines cleared and the facts squared away, they race ti save themselves from the deranged killer.

The Good News: This here was a relatively pleasant surprise. One of the biggest surprises is that this is a really complicated story done in an effective manner. Coupling together a bank robbery, a motorcycle gang, mountain-climbers and much more inside a run-of-the-mill slasher film is a great achievement, and that the countless story lines don't get tangled up or confusing is a major feat. There's a large amount of ideas in this one, and to have them all inside a regular film like this is a big plus for the film. These also help ensure the film's other really big factor, the film's relentless pace. By switching to so many different areas and angles, this one never really has an opportunity to get dull. It'll switch over to another angle right when it's starting to slow and play it out before that gets a little slow and then it switches again, keeping the interest there and the film constantly moving along. It may require some clues and hints to be spread throughout on what is going on, but it never gives the feeling of holding back information. There's also a large amount of great action scenes in here. The big motorcycle chase through the mountain roads is loads of fun, as it takes a long time to get through, features lots of little scenes to keep things interesting and moving forward, and there's even some other notable action movie staples. There's plenty of swerving to avoid the pursuing vehicles, a gunfight between each other, and a series of off-the-wall attempts to get rid of the pursuers. This is a great scene that really manages to get the viewer entertained. A shootout in the motel is also pretty exciting, inserted into the film at a great point to keep interest in the film. That it soon switches back to the slasher mode during the middle of the whole thing is a great topping. There's plenty of stalking, some great kills and a couple really creepy moments. The dispatch of the victims isn't anything new, but that there's actually a couple of slasher-style deaths in an action film. There's even some pretty violent ones in here, including being chopped repeatedly with an ax in the leg, an ax embedded in the shoulder, chest and to the back of the head, a machete dismemberment, and several violent gunshot wounds. There's more, as the healthy body count provides lots of opportunities. The film's last big feature is the film's last-half twist. It's completely original, comes out of nowhere, and really makes for a complete surprise. It's a brilliant idea and takes by a thrilling move. These all make the film really enjoyable.

The Bad News: There wasn't a whole lot here that didn't really work. One of the main elements that doesn't work is that the film never offers up solutions for anything. There's a quasi-explanation offered in the form of a bank heist, but as for an actual word, nothing. There's nothing as to why the killer's assistants are placed there or rather why anything in the film is why it is. This makes it seem like it's just a thrown-together film with nothing at all thought about it. The other big problem is that there's the occasional scene that comes off as pretty ridiculous or campy despite the intention. The killer chasing after a car in an all-terrain-vehicle, the conversations with a rather goofy motel owner, and so on have the appearance of being too campy for it's own good than it should've been. Otherwise, this one didn't really have anything wrong with it.

The Final Verdict: This was a pleasantly enjoyable slasher film with very few problems and a lot to really like about it. It's more action-oriented leanings might not engender it to most hardcore slasher fans but give it an honest shot, there's a lot to like with it.

Rated R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language
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