The Constant Gardener (2005)
Sir Bernard Pellegrin: Do you no good to go poking around under rocks, Justin. Some very nasty things live under rocks, especially in foreign gardens.
Justin Quayle: Arnold Bluhm is gay, Bernard. Gay men don't rape their women friends.
Sir Bernard Pellegrin: [bemused] Well, I've known one or two very savage queens in my time.
Tessa Quayle: I thought you spies knew everything.
Tim Donohue: Only God knows everything. He works for Mossad.
Tessa Quayle: It's an outrageous thing. It's almost if it's -it's a marriage of convenience- and the only thing it's going to produce is dead offspring.
Lorbeer: Big pharmaceuticals are right up there with the arms dealers.
Lorbeer: I only give the food to the women, Mr. Black. Women make the homes, men just make wars... and hooch. Adam was God's first draft - He got it right with Eve. Tell that to your readers, Mr. Black.
Tim Donohue: I can get you out of Kenya. it's one of the few things we still do well. Drop it now, and it's over. I'll make sure word gets to the right people. Go home... and live
Justin Quayle: But I don't have a home, Tim. Tessa was my home.
Justin Quayle: [Tessa tells Justin to slow down, wanting to drive a woman, her baby, and her brother who are walking 40 kilometers back to his home] We can't involve ourselves in their lives, Tessa.
Tessa Quayle: Why.
Justin Quayle: Be reasonable. There are millions of people, they all need help. It's what the agencies are here for.
Tessa Quayle: Yeah, but these are three people that WE can help.
Tessa Quayle: Sorry, I've just got one question: Whose map is Britain using when it completely ignores the United Nations and decides to invade Iraq?
Tessa Quayle: Or do you think it's more diplomatic to bend the will of a superpower and politely take part in Vietnam the Sequel?
Justin Quayle: Well, ah, I can't speak for Sir Bernard...
Tessa Quayle: Oh, I thought that was why you were here?
[lecture audience laughs]
Justin Quayle: Well, diplomats have to go where they're sent.
Tessa Quayle: So do labradors.
Justin Quayle: [Smiling] Ouch... Well, I think Mr. Bernard would argue that when peaceful means are exhausted...
Tessa Quayle: Exhausted? Mr.Quayle, they're not exactly exhausted, they're just lying in the way of the tanks!
Justin Quayle: Oh, thank you Arnold. I... I can manage that. But I still don't see why you couldn't wait a couple of weeks. Why go all the way up to Loki?
Tessa Quayle: Well, we want to hear Grace Makanga speak, and she won't be coming to Nairobi.
Arthur "Ham" Hammond: So who has got away with murder? Not, of course, the British government. They merely covered up, as one does, the offensive corpses. Though not literally. That was done by person or persons unknown. So who has committed murder? Not, of course, the highly respectable firm of KDH Pharmaceutical, which has enjoyed record profits this quarter, and has now licensed ZimbaMed of Harare, to continue testing Dypraxa in Africa. No, there are no murders in Africa. Only regrettable deaths. And from those deaths we derive the benefits of civilization, benefits we can afford so easily... because those lives were bought so cheaply.
Policeman No. 1: For a diplomat you're not a very good liar.
Justin Quayle: I haven't risen very high.
Sir Kenneth "Kenny" Curtiss: You're what passes for James Bond around here. Get Her Majesty's secret service to pull a few things. It's what you spies do, isn't it?
Tim Donohue: Is it? Never really sure what it is we do.
Birgit: [on drug trials] Put $50,000 in the right hands and you can test battery acid as skin lotion.
[Aid workers are being airlifted from a village ahead of band of raiders. Justin brings aboard a local village girl]
Jonah Andika: I'm sorry, I can't take the girl.
Justin Quayle: I'm not leaving her!
Jonah Andika: We're only allowed evacuate aid workers.
Justin Quayle: To HELL with what's allowed! I'll -look, how much you want for her?
[pulls cash from pocket]
Justin Quayle: There's 800 dollars.
Jonah Andika: Don't embarrass me! You can't buy this. The rules are made for good reason. Please.
Justin Quayle: This is a child's life! There are no rules to cover that!
Jonah Andika: Look, there are thousands of them out there. I can't make an exception for this one child
Justin Quayle: Yes, but THIS is one we can help!
Tim Donohue: [after a car chase through the desert] Who did you think I was?
Justin Quayle: Fuck you, Donohue! This is bandit country.