Bad Apple (2004 TV Movie)
Cuthbert Gibbons: From now on, Tozzi here is gonna be your new best friend.
Freshy: But none of my friends look like him.
Freshy: I'll do anything.
Gibbons: Okay, let me tell you...
Freshy: I don't care, I'll do it.
Mike Tozzi: Shut up so he can tell you.
Freshy: He doesn't have to tell me. Whatever it is, I'll do it.
Gibbons and Tozzi: Shut up!
Stanley: You sleep with them?
Freshy: With who?
Stanley: The actresses.
Freshy: The actresses? Of course not. It's strictly a business relationship.
Stanley: You can't even get laid by porn actresses? That makes me sad. I don't even like you and that makes me sad.
Stanley: (to Tozzi) Hey, where do you think you're going?
Mike: To the john.
Stanley: Parking lot.
Mike: This is strictly a sit down operation.
Mike: If I find out you're lying I'm gonna cut you loose.
Freshy: I'm not lying. And you wouldn't cut me loose, Mike.
Mike: Oh yeah? What makes you so sure.
Freshy: Because you have a hard on for my sister.
Mike: Do you have something I can munch on?
Gina: You have a sick mind.
Mike: I'm talking about food!
Gina: I'd pay a million bucks to live in Jersey.
Mike: Yeah, well, I'd pay a million bucks to get out of it right now.
Gibbons: He's banging her. He's undercover and he's banging her!
Butters: You know, your partner has some trouble with intimacy. I didn't even hear him say goodbye when he left. Gina regretted giving into him so quickly.
Gibbons: Thank you, Dr. Ruth.
Gibbons: (to Mike) You don't get enough chances in real life to be an asshole, you have to be one on the job, too?
Gibbons: Where'd you buy this shit, Radio Shack?
Butters: Yeah, some of it.
Butters: (after Gibbon snaps at him) He forgets his perscription and it's MY fault?
[Stanley is checking out a maniquinn in a department store]
Bells: Stanley, it's wood.
Stanley: She's got a nice face.
Mike: Yeah, what?
Gina: I get a discount. Does that make you hot?
Gibbons: Call for back up!
Butters: Oh, yeah. Wait until there's screaming before you call for back up.
Bells: Listen to the mouth on this one, Mikey. And they call her brother Freshy.
Stanley: Can't you figure out how to use this stuff?
Gibbons: Yeah, if you hadn't of thrown the guy who knows how to work it off at fifth avenue.
Mike: I wanna try something.
Gina: We're in chains, isn't that kinky enough for you?