3.0/10
10
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Lessons in Love (1995)

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Credited cast:
Roxanne Hall ...
Jane
Mandy King ...
Teacher (as Yvette Coles)
...
(archive footage)
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29 May 1995 (UK)  »

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1.33 : 1
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Coma-inducing
27 November 2004 | by (The Underverse) – See all my reviews

Lessons in Love is the most boringest thing I have ever seen.

Back in late July/early August 1996 I was left the house to myself for the first time. 3 days with no adults. So what's the first thing a 15 year old does? Subscribe to the adult channels of course. The first thing I ever taped was Lessons in Love. And it was tedious.

It quickly became a joke around my high school and the tape rapidly and widely circulated (in my school, no one had EVER seen anything like this). The sadder kids found it erotic but the wiser kids (like myself) could do naught but laugh at it.

The 'story' is this: A girl comes round to her teachers house for some after-class lessons and they end up er...rubbing each other for about 10 hours. The acting is utterly abysmal and there's nothing sexy about it. The 'rubbing' isn't even really that explicit. I would in no way suggest that this be rated more than 15.

But the funniest thing about this incredibly dull yarn is the music. Oh man alive, the music is re-ally bad! I can still remember it clearly to this day. It just went on and on forever repeating the one single cue over and over and over.

The tape was sadly lost in circulation (even teachers got their hands on it) but I would like to see it again for nostalgia purposes. Either 1/10 or 10/10 depending on how you look at it.


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