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Cheerleader Autopsy (2003)

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When a freak accident strikes down a bus load of nubile cheerleaders, all hopes seem lost for the Fighting Beavers of Stinkwater High, until a crazy mortician and his idiot nephew discover that one of the corpses isn't a corpse.

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Brian D. Smith ...
Blain Prunus
Brian C. Smith ...
Clyde Prunus
Josh Latta ...
Norbert Wiffel
Calu Morton ...
Sassy Widington
Misty Kapp ...
Chrissie Cox
John Andrew Mitchell ...
Coach Pride (as John Suggs)
Waleuska Pallais ...
Helen Bedd
Melissa Bigler ...
Jane Doe
Jasmin Vaughan ...
Tina Braumeister
Maurice Ralston ...
Bus Driver
S.D. Stephens ...
Old Farmer (as S.D. 'Blackie' Stephens)
...
Pork Chop
Paul Trent ...
Ernie the Hick
Marilea Butler ...
Jane Doe's mother
Julia Wright ...
Miss Buckshot
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Storyline

Taking bad taste humor to unprecedented levels, Cheerleader Autopsy is an amiably sick low-budget horror-comedy from Writer/Director Stu Dodge!..Robert Firsching, All Movie Guide. The Plot: When a freak accident strikes down a bus load of nubile cheerleaders, all hopes seem lost for the Fighting Beavers of Stinkwater High...until an Alzheimer-afflicted mortician, his opportunistic college-dropout nephew and a simpering night janitor discover that one of the girls is still alive despite her gruesome disfigurements. The three men soon find themselves pitted against each other in a winner takes all face off for control of the last of the Beavers, and the recipe for an astonishingly potent healing elixir! If you're a fan of those late 70s/early 80s camp movies, and would like to see more dead cheerleaders than you can shake a stick at (if you're prone to shaking sticks at things), then CHEERLEADER AUTOPSY is for you! The DVD of this feature includes the DIRECTOR'S CUT of the movie, ... Written by Tony Widley

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Comedy | Horror

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25 November 2003 (USA)  »

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Connections

References Blind Date (1999) See more »

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Performed by Gracie & the Slipcovers
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User Reviews

 
I'm Dreaming of a White Trash Christmas
23 January 2005 | by (Happyville USA) – See all my reviews

Variety is the spice of life, and as a film lover, I like some of everything: Hollywood formula movies, pretentious art films, and unusual stuff that grows in the cracks in between. Stuff like CHEERLEADER AUTOPSY.

The plot, such as it is, says a lot:

Slice of Lowlife: Loser graduates from blow up sex dolls to sleeping corpses after he takes a job with a degenerate mortician. When fresh meat arrives in the form of dead cheerleaders laid out on the slab, battle begins to see who will emerge as king of the necrophiliacs.

If this were a drama, it would be horribly misanthropic, but in fact, C.A. is a mixture of romance, horror and crazy comedy. Hilarious moments pockmark the movie like a bad case of acne, and the cast ham it up as if the're in some old Warhol project. The janitor is played so creepily as to make Crispin Glover nervous, and as the white trash ingénue, Misty Kapp shines as bright as a beer can. I don't know about you, but I've seen enough peroxide blond brats, silly-cone tits and collagen lips for a while. Misty Kapp hits the g-spot in the role of The-Girl(in the trailer)-Next-Door. I hope to see her in more (or in less) in the future.

When Hollywood makes a slob comedy, the usual plot device is to depict a lovable rogue surrounded by good hearted but misunderstood outcasts. Vince Vaughn, for example, in DODGE BALL. Here, heroic, or "good" characters are notable only for their absence. There are no smart people, no nice people, no positive values, no morals. These characters' only concern is where their next beer or orgasm will come from. This absolute refusal to show anybody who is not a worthless P. of S. is one of the things that gives CHEERLEADER AUTOPSY it's edge. With no familiar signposts of morality, it gives the movie a sense of danger. Face it- even regarding the best of most Hollywood products, you know how the movie will end just by looking at the poster. With a movie like C.A., knowing anything can happen, means you don't know what will happen. It's far from normal, and that's the fun.

John Waters used to make movies like this, before he succumbed to the Hollywood dollar(s), but it's few and far between since then. In fact, this is a lot like Water's early stuff and that's a good barometer of whether you'll like it. You can't recommend PINK FLAMINGOS to just anyone, and the same is true of C.A. It's not for the squeamish, the overly sensitive, the politically correct. If you're metroplex mainstream, in the mood for the next Bruckheimer blockbuster, you'll hate it; The art house crowd will despise it. But if you like variety, and need to decompress from the above choices now and then, fire up the bong, and open the six pack, and take the dirt road off the mainstream highway to CHEERLEADER AUTOPSY. .


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