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Alfie (2004) Poster

(2004)

Quotes

Alfie: It seems to me the problems you worry yourself sick about never seem to materialize. It's the ones that catch you unexpectedly on a Wednesday afternoon that knock you sideways.

[last lines]

Alfie: What have I got? Really? Some money in my pocket. Some nice threads, fancy car at my disposal, and I'm single. Yeah... unattached, free as a bird... I don't depend on nobody. Nobody depends on me. My life's my own. But I don't have peace of mind. And if you don't have that, you've got nothing. So... So what's the answer? That's what I keep asking myself. What's it all about? You know what I mean?

[from trailer]

Alfie: Whenever you meet a beautiful woman, just remember somewhere there's a man who's sick of shagging her.

Alfie: In every doomed relationship, there comes what I like to call "The uh-oh moment". When a certain little something happens, and you know you've just witnessed the beginning of the end. And suddenly you stop and you think, "Uh-oh, iceberg ahead".

Alfie: I felt I needed a friend to talk to. But as it was, they were suddenly in short supply.

Alfie: [to the viewer] I told you how we men are. We want showstoppers. And the problem is, Julie hasn't got enough of the superficial things that really matter.

Alfie: Personally, I've always suspected that everyone else is having a far merrier Christmas than I am.

Alfie: If you ooze masculinity, like some of us do, you have no reason to fear pink.

Alfie: [to the viewer] Couples should never split up between Thanksgiving and January 2nd. Always have a relationship to see you through the holidays. Always.

Alfie: [to the viewer] Of all the women I've known,the one I let my guard down with delivers the knockout punch

Joe: You did the only thing you could do. You behaved like a gentlemen.

Alfie: I've never been accused of that before.

Joe: Don't get all choked up. You also behaved like a scheming, back-stabbing, so low could look up a snake's asshole, son of a bitch. Next time think before you unzip.

Alfie: Alright, you screwed up. So what are you gonna do, hmm? Run to the bridge? The question is, what's gonna happen with the rest of your life.

[from trailer]

Alfie: I'd like a little privacy please.

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Alfie: [to the viewer] I, myself, subscribe more to the European philosophy of life, my priorities leaning towards wine, women... well, actually, that's about it.

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Julie: Where were you last night?

Alfie: I thought we agreed we weren't asking each other those questions.

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Alfie: Anyone in the mood for a little Alfie, straight-up?

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Joe: There are two things I've learned in life: find someone to love and live everyday as if it were your last.

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Alfie: Strange. But even when you know it has to end, when it finally does, you always get that inevitable twinge: Have i done the right thing?

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Alfie: In a flash I have my new year's resolution - aim higher.

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Alfie: I find that, lately, even lying to myself comes easily.

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Alfie: [to Marlon, about Lonette] You were at her front door, 3 a.m. in the morning, begging and vomiting? And what, she wasn't charmed by that?

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[first lines]

Alfie: You're lucky you know. I rarely allow anyone into my flat.

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Alfie: And so, it came to pass, that after all those years, little Alfred finally got what he wanted for Christmas.

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Alfie: Hang in mate. Come on, you can win her back. Woo her. Send flowers. Chocolates, right? Write a poem.

Wing: Dat what you do?

Alfie: Well, actually no, I've never done that. But it... maybe a way to go...

Wing: What rhyme with Blossom.

Alfie: I would try... awesome?

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Alfie: I never... I never meant...

Marlon: ...You never mean to hurt anybody.

Marlon: But you do, Alfie.

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Flower Shop Proprietor: Tell me what she - or he - is like, and we'll find the appropriate bloom.

Alfie: Well - she - is... You know what, she's adventurous.

Flower Shop Proprietor: Ah.

[grabbing first bloom]

Flower Shop Proprietor: Frivolite!

Alfie: And, very sexy.

Flower Shop Proprietor: I'm thinking, Dolce Vita!

Alfie: A little mischievous. Cheeky?

Flower Shop Proprietor: Avalanche. With a touch of Mi Amore.

Alfie: And then under it all, she's, she's just. She's just kind of... sweet.

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Alfie: I think this just might be my favorite position. I know it was President Kennedy's. He was such a great leader. Of course JFK used the old bad back excuse, but if you ask me, he knew that it gives you the maximum pleasure with minimum exertion.

See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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