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Directed by | |||
| Uwe Boll | |||
Writing credits | ||
| Elan Mastai | (written by) & | |
| Michael Roesch | (written by) & | |
| Peter Scheerer | (written by) | |
Produced by | |||
| Uwe Boll | .... | executive producer | |
| Bruno Bonnell | .... | co-executive producer | |
| Dan Clarke | .... | line producer (as Daniel Clarke) | |
| Frederic Demey | .... | associate producer | |
| Wolfgang Herold | .... | executive producer | |
| Harry Rubin | .... | co-executive producer | |
| Dan Sales | .... | associate producer (as Daniel Sales) | |
| Philip Selkirk | .... | associate producer | |
| Jonathan Shore | .... | associate producer | |
| Jörg Tittel | .... | associate producer | |
| Max Wanko | .... | associate producer | |
| Shawn Williamson | .... | producer | |
Original Music by | |||
| Reinhard Besser | |||
| Oliver Lieb | |||
| Bernd Wendlandt | |||
| Peter Zweier | |||
Cinematography by | |||
| Mathias Neumann | |||
Film Editing by | |||
| Richard Schwadel | |||
Casting by | |||
| Maureen Webb | |||
Production Design by | |||
| Tink | |||
Art Direction by | |||
| Peter Stratford | |||
Set Decoration by | |||
| David Birdsall | |||
Costume Design by | |||
| Maria Livingstone | |||
Makeup Department | |||
| Honey Dawn Faircrest | .... | assistant hair stylist (as Honey-Dawn Faircrest) | |
| Kathy Howatt | .... | first assistant makeup artist | |
| Lise Kuhr | .... | key makeup artist | |
| Harlow MacFarlane | .... | special makeup effects artist | |
| J.P. Mass | .... | special makeup effects artist | |
| Tamar Ouziel | .... | key makeup artist: second unit | |
| Connie Parker | .... | key makeup artist | |
| Sanna Seppanen | .... | hair stylist | |
| Carole Simcox | .... | day checker makeup artist | |
| Bill Terezakis | .... | special makeup effects designer | |
| Maureen Terezakis | .... | special makeup effects producer | |
| Monique Venier | .... | special makeup effects artist | |
| Vince Yoshida | .... | special makeup effects artist | |
| Howard Lau | .... | special makeup effects artist (uncredited) | |
| Keith Lau | .... | special makeup effects artist (uncredited) | |
Production Management | |||
| Paul Lukaitis | .... | unit manager | |
Art Department | |||
| David Dowling | .... | property master | |
| Troy Eirich | .... | assistant property master | |
| Wes Hamby | .... | assistant property master | |
| Jeremy Hanen | .... | set dresser | |
| Stefan Lochmann | .... | storyboard artist | |
| Daniel Scarcello | .... | sculptor | |
| Gary Young | .... | sculptor | |
| Chelsea Yusep | .... | assistant art director | |
Sound Department | |||
| Konrad Birnbaum | .... | sound post assistant | |
| Phillip Bürger | .... | sound post assistant | |
| Jose R. Castellon | .... | adr recordist | |
| William Conrad | .... | sound editor | |
| Jochen Engelke | .... | sound editor | |
| Jochen Engelke | .... | sound re-recording mixer | |
| Tobias Fleig | .... | sound re-recording mixer | |
| Wolfgang Herold | .... | sound supervisor | |
| Bob Holbrook | .... | boom operator | |
| Manuel Karakas | .... | mix editor | |
| Manuel Karakas | .... | re-recording projectionist | |
| Deni King | .... | adr supervisor | |
| Yumiko Konomi | .... | sound editor | |
| Annika Krieger | .... | sound post assistant | |
| Roland Platz | .... | foley supervisor | |
| Marco Raab | .... | additional sound designer (as Ma Raab) | |
| Peter Roigk | .... | foley artist | |
| Adam Sharpe | .... | adr mixer | |
| Max Wanko | .... | dialogue editor | |
| Max Wanko | .... | supervising sound editor | |
| Fritz A. Wollner | .... | sound editor (as F.A. Wollner) | |
Special Effects by | |||
| Barry Hebein | .... | lead metal fabricator | |
| Ian Korver | .... | special effects first assistant | |
| Thierry Latremoille | .... | lighting technical director | |
| Vance Vegas Salvalaggio | .... | special effects technician | |
| John Sleep | .... | special effects coordinator | |
Visual Effects by | |||
| Michael Alkan | .... | lighting technical director | |
| Marcus Beiner | .... | vfx system integration | |
| Gilles Beloeil | .... | lighting technical director | |
| Ann-Marie Blommaert | .... | visual effects coordinator | |
| Jeff Bruneel | .... | digital compositor: ToyBox | |
| Maria Bückenhoff | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Kevin Chandoo | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Lester Chung | .... | 2D compositor (as Lester James Chung) | |
| Dug Claxton | .... | digital compositor | |
| Gerrit Corsmeyer | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Phil Dakin | .... | lighting/texture artist | |
| Anthony De Chellis | .... | character animator: ToyBox | |
| Jeremy Dineen | .... | senior visual effects animator: Toybox | |
| Pete Dionne | .... | 3D artist: ToyBox | |
| Andrew Edwards | .... | Inferno artist | |
| Christopher Elke | .... | visual effects assistant producer | |
| Daniel Fiegenschuh | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Jay Field | .... | compositor | |
| Helena Fischer | .... | visual effects artist | |
| John Fukushima | .... | digital compositor | |
| Brent Paul George | .... | character animation director | |
| Brent Paul George | .... | digital character supervisor | |
| Brent Paul George | .... | lead creature technical director | |
| Paul C. George | .... | sequence supervisor | |
| Ted Gervan | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Martin Gessner | .... | visual effects producer | |
| Peter Giliberti | .... | lead animator | |
| Mark Goldberg | .... | digital effects artist | |
| Adrian Graham | .... | visual effects technical supervisor | |
| Rob Gyorgy | .... | editor / vfx artist | |
| Bodo Keller | .... | visual effects producer | |
| Iris Krause-Mirus | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Filip Lange | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Francois Latremoille | .... | visual effects | |
| Chad Malbon | .... | digital film producer | |
| Simon Mayer | .... | title artist | |
| Ryan McDonald | .... | render wrangler | |
| Erik Nordby | .... | digital compositor | |
| Sean O'Hara | .... | compositor | |
| Doug Oddy | .... | visual effects supervisor | |
| Richard Oey | .... | character animator | |
| Sébastien Quessy | .... | effects technical director | |
| Jan Raimann | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Florent Revel | .... | character animator | |
| Tania Richard | .... | matte artist | |
| Thorsten Schell | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Christoph Schuhmacher | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Geoff D.E. Scott | .... | visual effects supervisor | |
| Michael Shapcotte | .... | visual effects systems integrator: Toybox | |
| Jason Snea | .... | compositing supervisor | |
| Martin Tardif | .... | lighting technical director | |
| Joel Tong | .... | digital compositor | |
| Max Wanko | .... | visual effects supervisor | |
| Fiona Campbell Westgate | .... | visual effects producer | |
| Wendy Whaley | .... | digital compositor | |
| Sarah Wormsbecher | .... | visual effects coordinator: Toybox | |
| Benjamin J. Wylie | .... | 3D animator | |
| Philippe Zerounian | .... | character animator | |
| Lars Zimmermann | .... | visual effects artist | |
| Bojan Zoric | .... | creature concept designer | |
| Bojan Zoric | .... | digital matte painter | |
| Nick Perks | .... | 3D animator: research and development (uncredited) | |
| Anna Terekhova | .... | digital film assistant (uncredited) | |
Stunts | |||
| Ed Anders | .... | stunt coordinator | |
| Shawn Beaton | .... | utility stunts | |
| Jason Calder | .... | stunt performer | |
| Dave Campbell | .... | stunts | |
| Mike Carpenter | .... | stunt double | |
| Douglas Chapman | .... | stunts | |
| Laura Lee Connery | .... | stunt double: Tara Reid | |
| Mike Crestejo | .... | stunt coordinator | |
| Kylie Furneaux | .... | stunts | |
| Christopher Gordon | .... | stunt double: Christian Slater-Carnby | |
| Andrea Kinsky | .... | stunts | |
| Scott Leva | .... | stunt coordinator: action wire coordinator | |
| Rick Moore | .... | stunt double | |
| Gerald Paetz | .... | stunt driver | |
| Raymond Sammel | .... | stunt performer | |
| Darryl Scheelar | .... | stunt performer | |
| Sharon Simms | .... | stunt performer | |
| Kimani Ray Smith | .... | stunts | |
| Sylvesta Stuart | .... | stunt performer | |
| Brad Turner | .... | stunts | |
| Owen Walstrom | .... | stunt coordinator | |
| Claire Webb | .... | stunt double | |
| Darren E. Scott | .... | stunts (uncredited) | |
| Monte Thompson | .... | stunts (uncredited) | |
| Brian Tonomura | .... | stunts (uncredited) | |
Camera and Electrical Department | |||
| Mark Cohen | .... | camera operator: "a" camera | |
| Mark Cohen | .... | first assistant camera | |
| Jesse Deacon | .... | assistant chief lighting technician | |
| Ryan Epp | .... | video technician | |
| Chris Helcermanas-Benge | .... | still photographer | |
| Carol Macdonald | .... | second assistant camera | |
| Brad Smith | .... | b dolly grip | |
| Jason Weir | .... | lighting technician | |
| Steven J. Winslow | .... | camera technician: Wescam camera | |
| Darek Wyszynski | .... | first assistant camera: second unit | |
Animation Department | |||
| Frédéric Côté | .... | animator | |
| Pedram Goshtasbpour | .... | senior animator | |
| Zachary V. Lowe | .... | animator | |
| Danny Testani | .... | animator | |
Casting Department | |||
| Frederic Robinson | .... | casting assistant | |
Costume and Wardrobe Department | |||
| Patti Bishop | .... | assistant costume designer | |
| Audrey Wong | .... | set costumer | |
Editorial Department | |||
| Rhonda Blewett | .... | telecine assistant | |
| Massimo Gubinelli | .... | color grader | |
| Gary Lam | .... | first assistant editor | |
| Warren Mazutinec | .... | first assistant editor | |
| Daniela Szentgrothy | .... | assistant post-production supervisor | |
Music Department | |||
| Wolfgang Herold | .... | executive soundtrack producer | |
| Wolfgang Herold | .... | music supervisor | |
| Walter Christian Mair | .... | composer: additional music | |
| Hugo Sanchez | .... | music editor | |
Transportation Department | |||
| Clif Kosterman | .... | transportation coordinator | |
Other crew | |||
| Evan Allen | .... | production assistant | |
| Mariam Arthur | .... | assistant: Mr. Sales | |
| Lawren Bancroft-Wilson | .... | office production assistant | |
| Ron Blecker | .... | military advisor | |
| Vitomir Bogdanovic | .... | production assistant | |
| Madeleine Brettschneider | .... | accountant | |
| Hsun-Wei David Chang | .... | assistant to producers | |
| Byron Drinkle | .... | playback coordinator | |
| Karyn Edwards | .... | legal counsel | |
| Henry Eshelman | .... | publicist | |
| Alexander Glua | .... | production assistant | |
| Matthias Herold | .... | legal | |
| Elle House | .... | miscellaneous crew | |
| Anne Jacobsen | .... | production accountant | |
| Hanno Kaempf | .... | legal counsel | |
| Micah Kelpin | .... | assistant: Mr. Williamson | |
| Jennifer Lewis | .... | trainee assistant location manager | |
| Terry Mackay | .... | location manager | |
| Sheri Mayervich | .... | assistant location manager | |
| Robert Milicevic | .... | security | |
| W. Robert Millar | .... | assistant location manager | |
| Samantha Morris | .... | assistant: Mr. Williamson | |
| Sue Pidhorney | .... | assistant: Mr. Slater | |
| Lane Price | .... | body double | |
| Mary Quinn | .... | assistant: Mr. Hegyes | |
| Pascual Romero | .... | publicity and promotions | |
| Brendan Rooney | .... | assistant production coordinator | |
| Joey Setter | .... | production coordinator | |
| Misha Skoric | .... | assistant: Mr. Dorff | |
| Suzanne E. Smith | .... | payroll accountant (as Suzanne Clements) | |
| Tracy D. Smith | .... | script development | |
| Caden St. Clair | .... | additional voice | |
| Ryan Steacy | .... | armorer | |
| Sasha Tong | .... | assistant: Ms. Reid | |
| Dan Lee West | .... | unit manager: reshoot | |
Thanks | |||
| Avery Zands | .... | thanks | |
| Jan Zands | .... | thanks | |
| Monika Zands | .... | special thanks | |
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I usually start by relaying the premise of the film, but before anyone makes any hasty judgments about my review, let me preface it by saying that I'm someone who likes most films (just check my other reviews). Alone in the Dark is a film by director Uwe Boll, whose film right before this one was House of the Dead (2003). Like Alone in the Dark, it was also a film adaptation of a video game. Almost everyone hated it. Well, I loved it. I even gave it a 10 out of 10! My point in stating this (which will surely turn some readers off immediately) is that if even I hated Alone in the Dark, there must be something wrong with it.
The Premise: Who am I kidding? Attempting to state a premise for this film is about as easy as trying to balance the United States' budget, but here it goes anyway. Some archaeologists discovered evidence of some lost American Indian tribe. The Indian tribe apparently had discovered some means of broaching the "second world", which was evil in nature. The bad stuff wiped them out, but not before they could lock the door to the evil world and throw away the key. Later, some scientist/government researcher who had been experimenting with the paranormal, and specifically this tribe, decided to experiment on some kids, to try to produce some kind of hybrid with the second world. (Believe it or not--everything up to this point and then some is told to us in a written prologue to the film--it's just white text scrolling across a black screen with a voice-over also reading it to us). Then, there was something about the kids being in an orphanage, but the government takes them back out, and then a bunch of people are searching for archaeological relics, and there are super humans roaming around, and a bunch of military people are called in and on and on.
In fact, the exposition never really stops. It's like a neverending backstory from hell. There are enough ideas here to fill at least 10 films, maybe 25. But not one of them is presented in a coherent way to create one good film. In addition to the mystical lost Indian tribe and the superhumans, we also get monsters that resemble a cross between Alien and a werewolf, worms that invade your body and turn into snake-like aliens, tunneling worms underground, zombies, Starship Trooper-like wars, evil scientists, underground lairs, gold mines, spooky warehouses, impalements, big mostly unused museums, government conspiracies, golden trunks pulled out of the sea, nuns, explosions, complex backstabbing plots, a very ambiguous romance, car chases, home invasions, kitchen sinks . . . wait, I can't remember if that last one was in the film. Even more amazingly (amusingly?), in Fangoria #240, producer Shawn Williamson was quoted as saying, "We're spending much more time on story, being very meticulous about that". Tara Reid called Alone in the Dark "a smarter film".
Let me not mislead anyone. A lot of that stuff above might sound yummy to the potential audience for this film, but the problem is that nothing has the slightest connection to anything else. I usually had no idea what any setting's relation was to any other setting, why we were there, or what anyone was doing (at least when each scene began). It's just a random mishmash of settings and clichés, as if director Uwe Boll had 250 unrelated ideas in a hat and pulled them out like lottery numbers. Then when he was done, he and editor Richard Schwadel decided to cut the film by using dice, then reassembled it by throwing the I Ching. Sometimes the film plays like an extended director's reel (which is a combination of short, varied, unrelated scenes that directors circulate to try to get work), but perhaps that's being too generous. I'm not sure Boll would get work if this were his reel.
Just as I tend to at least like most films, I tend to like most actors and most performances. It's very rare that I say that a performance was bad. Well, Tara Reid was bad here--and I'm someone who usually likes Reid. I don't know what happened. For a large percentage of the film, they just move her around the set like a prop. They might as well have just bought a blow-up doll. That would have saved them money that they could have used for some cgi ghosts and vampires in castle and graveyard settings. Maybe they chose to move her around like a pretty piece of driftwood after they saw the dailies of her mumbling nonsense dialogue in a monotone that's usually reserved for entertaining mother-in-laws.
And speaking of that dialogue, a lot of Alone in the Dark plays like a Godzilla film without Godzilla. By that, I mean that it's a lot of pseudo-scientific gobbledy-gook. At least in Godzilla films, there's a campiness to it, because they know how ridiculous it is, and there's a big payoff in that we get to see Godzilla destroy downtown and battle a giant gnat with radioactive death beams shooting from its eyes or something.
Just what Stephen Dorff and Christian Slater are doing here, besides overacting and filing lawsuits against their agents, is difficult to say. I can't say that I thought anyone in the film had a decent performance, although maybe Slater at least saw the cigar. I think that's unprecedented for me.
Still, I didn't give this film a 1. There was some competent cinematography, even if Boll and Schwadel made mincemeat out of it, and the hard rock tunes over the end credits were good. Heck, even the novelette prologue wasn't so bad. I actually thought the film had promise at that point. But this may just be the worst film I've ever seen with a budget of 20 million or more.