Dae-su Oh: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Weep and you weep alone.
Woo-jin Lee: Remember this: "Be it a rock or a grain of sand, in water they sink as the same."
Dae-su Oh: Even though I'm no more than a monster - don't I, too, have the right to live?
Dae-su Oh: If they had told me it was going to be fifteen years, would it have been easier to endure?
Woo-jin Lee: Your gravest mistake wasn't failing to find the answer. You can't find the right answer if you ask the wrong questions.
Dae-su Oh: Can 10 years' worth of imaginary training... be put to use?
Dae-su Oh: [Dae-su beats up his assailants] Apparently, it can.
Dae-su Oh: [on receiving three chopsticks with his prison rations] All I could think about in that moment was the guy in the next room was eating with only one chopstick.
Dae-su Oh: [after getting knocked over and taking a drag of a cigarette] "Dick-shit"... a new word. Television doesn't teach you swear words.
Dae-su Oh: Who the hell are you?
Woo-jin Lee: Me? I'm a sort of scholar. And my major is you. A scholar studying Dae-su Oh; an expert on Dae-su Oh.
Dae-su Oh: Can the imaginary training of fifteen years be put to use?
Dae-su Oh: [Dae-su tries to sexually assault Mi-do and gets clobbered] No. It can't.
Woo-jin Lee: Your tongue got my sister pregnant! It wasn't Woo-jin Lee's dick; it was Dae-su Oh's tongue!
Dae-su Oh: [after a huge fight] As I expected, I can't get along with anyone today either.
Mi-do: [looking around the inside of Dae-su's "cell"] You stayed in a place like this for fifteen years?
Dae-su Oh: Yeah, but after the first eleven it felt like home.
Dae-su Oh: Revenge is good for your health, but pain will find you again.
Dae-su Oh: You need not worry about the future, Imagine nothing.
Dae-su Oh: If by any chance Mido should find out the truth, you son of a bitch, I'm going to rip you limb from limb. And your remains will never be found. Why? Because I'm going to swallow every last bit.
Dae-su Oh: The TV is both a clock and a calendar. It's your school, your home, your church, your friend...
[Dae-su masturbates to a pop star onscreen]
Dae-su Oh: ... and your lover. But... my lover's song is too short.
Woo-jin Lee: You want to torture me, but I can simply kill myself first. Do you want revenge, or do you want the truth?
Mr. Park: You see, they say that people shrivel up because they have an imagination. So, don't imagine anything, you'll become brave as hell.
Dae-su Oh: [after a very messy beating] Anyone here with an AB blood type, raise your hand.
Woo-jin Lee: You really are the very monster I created, aren't you? But you won't find out the "why" of this if you kill me. Fifteen years of being curious would go to waste.
Dae-su Oh: If you stand aimlessly at a phone booth on a rainy day, and meet a man whose face is covered by a violet umbrella, I'd suggest that you get close to the TV.
Dae-su Oh: [Dae Su is on his knees. Begging] Please. Don't tell Mido. What has she done wrong? You know it was all my fault... I have committed an unforgivable sin, against your sister. And I also... Did you wrong. Please leave Mido alone... If by any chance Mido finds out the truth, you son of a bitch, I'll tear you limb from limb. And your remains will never be found. Why? Because I'm going to swallow every last bit.
[Crawls over to Woo-Jin and starts to grovel to Woo-Jin]
Dae-su Oh: Woo-Jin! Please, sir, I made a mistake. Please forget what I said. Sir, Woo-Jin!
[Raises up on his knees to face Woo-Jin]
Dae-su Oh: We're Evergreen Oldboys, remember?
Dae-su Oh: With the energy of a green pine tree/The Great Sangnok High...
[Grabbing hold of Woo-Jin's leg. Begging, and weeping]
Dae-su Oh: I'll do whatever you want. I'll do anything, I beg you. Woo-Jin, if you want me to be your dog. I will. From this moment on, I am Woo-Jin's dog. I'm your bitch.
[Starts barking maniacally like a dog]
Dae-su Oh: Look, I'm wagging my tail. I'm a dog, I'll guard your house. I'll be your slave...
[Starts crying frantically, and falls to Woo-Jin's feet. He begins to lick his shoes... Humiliated... defeated... ]
Woo-jin Lee: And now... now, what joy will I have left to live for?
Dae-su Oh: [Dae-su is about to use a clawhammer to yank out someone's teeth] Each one I yank out will make you age for one year. Ready to talk?
Mr. Park: We put a hypnosis-inducing drug in your water
Dae-su Oh: Sodium barbiturate?
Mr. Park: Ha! TV Man knows it all!
Dae-su Oh: Erasing my memory and telling me to find the truth was cowardly. I won. So die like you promised.
Woo-jin Lee: My sister and I loved each other, despite everything. Can you two do the same?
Dae-su Oh: I thought I'd lived a simple life. But I've sinned too much
Dae-su Oh: When the melody turns on, gas comes out. When the gas comes out, I fall asleep. I found out later it's the same Valium gas the Russians used on those Chechen terrorists.
Woo-jin Lee: What I am isn't important. WHY is important.
Mr. Park: [hands Dae-Su a business card while grinning a big gold-toothed grin] This dentist is really good.
Mi-do: Very lonely people that I met... they all hallucinated ants at one time.
Woo-jin Lee: Mister. Are you alright? What happened to you? Saewoon Apartments, Eung-am building 8. Take care of him.
Dae-su Oh: Thank You.
Woo-jin Lee: Not at all. Well, then. Farewell, Oh Dae Su.
Dae-su Oh: Farewell, Oh Dae Su.
Mi-do: Dae Su. In front of me is some kind of box. He's telling me to open it. It's the same violet box...
Dae-su Oh: No! No Mi-do don't. Don't open it no matter what. Or something terrible will happen.
Woo-jin Lee: My sister and I loved each other, despite everything. Can you do the same?
Dae-su Oh: Please. Don't tell Mido. What has she done wrong? You know it was all my fault... I have committed an unforgivable sin, against your sister. And I also... Did you wrong. But, please leave Mido alone... If by any chance Mido finds out the truth, you son of a bitch, I'll tear you limb from limb. And your remains will never be found. Why? Because I'm going to swallow every last bit.
Dae-su Oh: [holding up a sign] I'VE BEEN BUGGED. PLEASE FIND IT.