[about to be dissected by the apes. One pulls out a banana]
Timmy: What are you gonna do? Smush that on my head?
[the banana is really a drill]
[about being fairy godmother to the monkey, Bippy]
Wanda: I don't know what's worse, the butt scratching or the scintillating conversation.
Denzel Crocker: If they don't dissect you, do you wanna come to my party on Friday?
Denzel Crocker: You know what this bow down needs? SHRIMP PUFFS.
[shrimp puffs fall from the sky]
Townspeople: AH. SHRIMP PUFFS.
[Timmy, disguised, threatens Crocker]
Denzel Crocker: Hmm. What could an evil ruler say in a time like this?
Wanda: [captured] I'm gonna let the fairy go?
Denzel Crocker: NO. But good try, though. I respect that. He'd say SILENCE.
Mom: Maybe Timmy's right. Maybe we do fudge the truth too much.
Dad: Now honey, I'm sure Timmy's overreacting. Let's just pop in the tape and see how long it takes to catch ourselves in a little white lie.
Mom: You're right. I'll bet there's not a single lie on any of these tapes.
[Scene of older footage of the Turner family on videotape]
Dad: Wow. That was quick.
Wanda: When are you going to let me out?
Denzel Crocker: What's today?
Denzel Crocker: Wednesday, Thursday... NEVER!
Timmy: How hard can it be to find one stinkin' muffin?
[party erupts in school cafetria for "Muffin Monday"]
Muffin Man: Oh boy. IT'S MUFFIN MONDAY.
A.J.: I thought it was monkey Monday.
Chester McBadbat: [angry] Aw, man!
[pulls out muffler]
Chester McBadbat: What am I supposed to do with THIS THING?
Cosmo: This could be a whole new adventure for us. Who knows what unique and interesting things monkeys could wish for?
Bippy: Ook ahk.
[Cosmo grants wish, bannana appears]
[Timmy flees the classroom]
Denzel Crocker: Oh no you don't. You need a hall pass for that.
[a girl finds a boy with fairy godparents]
Flashback Girl: Hey, are those fairy godparents?
Flashback Boy: They sure are.
[Godparents vanish forever because it's a rule]
Flashback Girl: Loser.
[while the world is being ruled by apes]
Cosmo: [sings] I love the species that throws their own feces.
[Timmy and Crocker are fighting in a sub-atomic universe]
Timmy: You always were a lousy teacher, Crocker. But I did learn something from science class, and that is what happens when you split an atom.
[Timmy fires one of cupid's arrows, but... ]
Denzel Crocker: HA-HAAA! You MISSED!
Timmy: [smugly] Wasn't aiming at ya.
Principal Waxelplax: Crocker! What's the meaning of this fork in my fanny?
Denzel Crocker: Uh... It's Cupid's fork... Of love... I LOVE YOU!
Principal Waxelplax: Well, this is so sudden... and unwanted.
Jorgen von Strangle: [after being cleared of memory] What was I going to do next?
Cosmo: Uhhh... Scramble the fairies?
Jorgen von Strangle: YES! I like to scramble the fairies!
Cosmo: I'm terrible at small talk! Ask me about the weather!
Timmy: Uhhh... How's the weather?
Cosmo: JEFF! See!