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Reviews & Ratings for
Fear of Clowns (V) More at IMDbPro »

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24 out of 32 people found the following review useful:

A Review of the Director for the Director

1/10
Author: Tremonti81 from CA
16 April 2006

Hey,

I've seen a lot of posts where you defend the hell out of this flick, but I've got to tell you, you can't blame shoddy writing and extremely poor directing on a lack of budget. I was on board to see a movie that looked like crap but had all the basic elements OK, because that's what a low-low budget film normally has. But this "film" is a piece of crap.

Here's the complaints:

ON WRITING: You claim to have a definitive love of horror films, specifically Halloween and Alien, yet you completely ignore the structure of these scripts. Each great horror film has its foundation in a strong psychological subtext (I.E. repression and return of the repressed, male/female archetypes and the overthrow of such, infiltration of boundaries, etc.). Your film has people talking in circles with crap lines like "Have you ever been spanked by a clown?". If childhood trauma were at the heart of the film, why not draw us more into it? Instead, you do what every other hack in this business does: you write B.S. dialogue that makes no sense because you don't have the first clue as to who your characters are.

In addition, the reason that this film is not scary is because you explain EVERYTHING. What's scarier: a psycho-killer who walks around in a mask killing for no reason and with no remorse or a psycho-killer who sits around saying, " Get BETTER, Get BETTER."? This is why Carpenter, Craven and Scott are geniuses, and well, you have this as your crowning achievement.

ON DIRECTING: Have you ever heard of the 180 degree line? You jump all over the place with mismatched reverse shots, and ever-changing screen direction, leaving us as an audience unable to settle. And since you've asked repeatedly why the editing is bad, I have one question: Do either you or your editor know what a beat is? There are no dramatic moments in this film because you are constantly cutting away from them. What could have been a nice introductory scene between your two protagonists becomes a confusing mess because you cut the living daylights out of it.

This "film" has no sense of mood or character whatsoever. I think the character that actually went deepest was Shivers, and that should say something about where your focus was. In your extremely self-important and self-indulgent "making of" segment, I found your attitude toward your actors appalling. First of all, DO NOT DIRECT A RESULT! This is the first rule of working with actors, taught in the most basic of classes. When you stood there and said to Mark something like, "I want to see a mixture of agitated and hungry" or something to that effect, my heart broke for all of the people who had to work under such conditions. And at one point you were yelling at people, and saying to the actors, "I just want to finish this f--- ing scene and go home." What does that say to them about your level of support, when they're the ones bleeding on film for you. Shame on you, my friend, shame on you. And on a sidenote: if the makers of the camera that you shot with won't let you release their name or logo in your "making of", doesn't that say something about the film?

Rent the movie "Overnight". You might learn a thing or two about the path you are traveling. That is, if you ever do get a shot, which I highly doubt. You should go into another field, or at least take some classes on writing, directing and working with actors.

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22 out of 29 people found the following review useful:

What the hell?

1/10
Author: insomniaklad from Gold Coast, Australia
5 March 2006

I've seen some bad movies in my time, but this, for the love of everything that's holy, is definitely in my top 10 most horrid movies of all time. From the god-awful acting, to the choppy camera work, this movie can't even be classified as a "B Grade horror movie".

The constant chopping of camera angles made me feel as though I was watching an episode of "24", and the acting made me feel as though I was watching some trained dolphins do interpretive dance about their feelings. The upstanding performance by the "Detective" was played more like a 40's gumshoe than someone from (apparently) the 90's. The lead actress has two emotions - uninterested and confused. The clown, well, he was semi-cool. Not overly scary, but cool. He made me want to giggle, and poke him.

I can't emphasise the horrific acting enough. There are not words in my vocabulary to describe how pathetic and transparent it was. The single saving point for the movie is the story, which could have been made into a decent movie had some rational thought been injected into it.

All in all, don't waste your time unless you're a fan of pathetic acting.

If you want a similar experience, paint a wall and try to teach it to act. Even that will be more fulfilling.

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21 out of 30 people found the following review useful:

Amateur Nonsense

1/10
Author: amycrd from United Kingdom
6 March 2006

The acting in this film was diabolical: more wooden than a school play. It was so bad it had no comedy value either.

The detective character was the worst of all, and all these people should seriously consider a career change. This film had a feel about it that said that the director had just gathered a group of his mates together to act out a poorly written play for a laugh.

I confess that I cannot say whether this film had a good ending as I had to switch it off well before I got to the halfway stage even - it was THAT bad! I have never failed to watch a film all the way through, no matter how bad, before.

The clown was about as scary as a hippo. And what was with the weird speeded up part where he was chopping wood?

The camera techniques were all over the place and in a word this film was amateurish.

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11 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

Not great even for a frat house with a camcorder

1/10
Author: mike-2945 from United States
25 February 2006

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

At this time there were 37 reviews, almost all have to be from cast or parents of the cast because no one could stand the painful 45 minutes it takes to watch this trite even in fast-forward.

Please don't waste your time with this and instead take a neighbor up on their offer to watch their Grand Canyon vacation video - it will serve up more entertainment.

The most anguishing prospect is that there are hints of a sequel, or at least an opening. Could I do better? Probably not, unless you've seen my Grand Canyon vacation video.

For those who would like a quick summary, here it is: Girl stalked by killer clown. People around her die. Showdown with girl and new boyfriend. Both survive and cops come in at last second. Arrest clown, who suddenly has a lucid sane moment and gives up. Late phone call saying clown escaped. Fade to Black. Roll Credits.

There, I saved you 45-90 minutes of your precious time on Earth.

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11 out of 16 people found the following review useful:

The most laughable POS in history?

1/10
Author: Routine
10 March 2006

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Have you ever seen the director of a movie insult the viewers on IMDb for voicing their opinion? Well, this might be a first folks. This absolute, unredeemable piece of trash is by far the worst film you will ever see, period. A seemingly sweeping statement maybe, but if you're unfortunate enough to have seen this you will know what I'm talking about. Sadly the director and a handful of other wannabes have resorted to insulting their audience's opinions on the message board for this flick. The whole idea of these message boards is for movie fans/buffs to have their voice heard and to either recommend a film if they enjoyed it, or warn others off if they didn't. This movie, make no mistake, is amongst the worst films ever made. Truly laughable acting, awful script, stultifyingly stupid plot and an ending straight out of a retarded 9 year old's imagination. The mind boggles as to how this person got the 50 or 60 dollars budget this film appears to have had spent on it. Don't take my word for it. Watch the first five minutes and you will be rolling about on the floor laughing. Then, please oh please come back and let the director know that he is in the wrong business and plead with him never to make another. Ever. His buddies who are also insulting the movie-going public on these threads have nailed their colours to the wrong mast. This movie is honestly very possibly the worst film of all time. Seriously. 1/10

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9 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

Easiest way to put it...THIS WAS A BAD, HORRIBLE MOVIE!!!

1/10
Author: Honest_Movie_Reviews from United States
7 June 2006

This is one of those rare movies where absolutely NOTHING was good!! Usually I can always point to one good thing (I.E. An actor who stood out, a particular shot, editing, something)I can't believe the director is actually brain dead enough to try and defend this embarrassment of a film.

The acting is junk, there's no effects (I.E. gore,awesome killings,NOTHING!!) The script/story is junk and I swear the guy who plays Tuck will NEVER get a role in any project not featuring this incompetent director!! He was FAR AND AWAY the worst actor in this movie.

I'm mad as hell at myself for not having turned off this dogs*it movie that seems like it was made by someone who rode the small bus to school...I usually don't try to be cruel but to actually try and defend this pathetic attempt to make a film just makes me sick!! There's NO WAY the director and just about everyone else involved in making this trash don't know how bad this is!! And that by trying to defend this speaks volumes on their mental capacity (Or lack of)

There's not enough minus stars to give this pile of crap your best bet is to avoid it!! It'll bore you to tears within the first 5 minutes.

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10 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

Not in the league of Killer Klowns.

2/10
Author: 3-D from Ohio
15 March 2006

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

As a fan of killer clowns, I've seen pretty much every movie as such that's out there, including Clownhouse, Killjoy, and of course, Killer Klowns From Outer Space. A low budget movie has been added to the mix, entitled Fear of Clowns.

Unfortunately, I did not really enjoy this movie. First of all, 90% of the death scenes you don't see, since it always cuts-away right before each one. This is a big disappointment for horror fans, as seeing the carnage makes for more enjoyable horror. I mean, it's like renting a porno that cuts away to a different scene right before Ron Jeremy pulls his pants down.

The acting was really bad, particularly that of the token black policeman. He had such a small role in the film, yet his acting in those few minutes he had was so bad, it became the most memorable part of the film. Never have I wanted to kick somebody in the teeth so hard in my life.

The clown himself wasn't scary, at all. He was just some buff, shirtless man with a grease paint covered bald head, and Limp Bizkit eyes. That's not intimidating at all, but even if it had just one shred of horror, that becomes completely diminished when you hear him speak. I'm sorry, but a Vin Diesel clone in clown paint who sounds like a drunken wizard couldn't even scare a newborn baby with caulrophobia.

It's also funny how a half-naked clown holding King Arthur's axe casually walks around town and cuts people's heads off (although his body never gets stained with blood), and nobody notices. Unless they have a local circus in town whose clowns do double shifts as jousters at a Medieval Times restaurant, I'm pretty sure this guy would definitely warrant some concern with the citizens.

In a nutshell, this movie is not good at all. It's not because of the fact that it was low budget. The story was bad, leaving many loose ends and much nonsense. I'll give this movie 4 stars, but only because the camp value may keep you somewhat entertained. View this movie as a comedy, and not as a horror/thriller.

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8 out of 12 people found the following review useful:

Pretty poor.

Author: Prolox from Canada
6 March 2006

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

A serial killing clown (Yes another killer clown movie!) is stalking a young woman, all the while bumping off her friends & anyone else who is getting in his way of murdering her, but what does he want with her? why is he trying to kill her? I had heard about FEAR OF CLOWNS for sometime now, after reading a few good reviews for it both on this site & reading a couple good reviews from a few horror movie sites, I decided to check it out, even though I am pretty tired with the old killer clown storyline that seems to keep being remade over & over again in the indie scene (Won't clowns ever be respected in horror movies?). Now I have seem some really good killer clown movies in my time (KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE) & some truly bad ones (CARNIVAL OF SOULS 98' & S.I.C.K. SERIAL INSANE CLOWN KILLER) sadly FEAR OF CLOWNS falls into my really bad killer clowns movie list, I mean it's way better than S.I.C.K. & CARNIVAL OF SOULS 98' at least it was watchable in area's, where the others were just so bad they were just down right ghastly! yet at the same time this didn't offer anything new or give us anything truly memorable either. Shot on video, the film is extremely slow moving at the beginning, usually showing footage of the lead heroine's ex-husband & her fighting amongst a small group of lawyers, police investigations into an unseen murder that happened (commited by guess who...) the lead heroine meeting this new guy that takes a fascination to her work & her & various chats in the art gallery between her & her friend's, before the clown goes around offing the people she knows (all off screen) sadly the film is uninteresting, except for the neat scene where the cop has his head lopped off by the killer clown, but even that raises the question of why didn't anyone call the police? the murder was committed in broad daylight right on the heroine's front lawn, surely someone could see this happening, like drivers driving by or neighbors or kids on bikes, I mean with all the commotion going on with the cop arresting a guy dressed as a clown who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, in a misunderstanding & the real killer lopping off his head...doesn't make sense. All in all it's to slow moving to be any good, there's no suspense in the movie, the characters aren't that interesting & there's no scares or even gore in the film. Even slasher fans may have trouble watching this film. No doubt some on this site liked it, though I can't say I'm one of them. The killer clown looked silly (More like a WWE wrestler with no shirt, a muscular body & clown make-up) & I highly doubt even with a bigger budget & better actors it could have been a good movie, it's just to stale & it's nothing that you haven't already seen before. The last three minutes of the film is also confusing, though I do admit it was kind of suspenseful (If only the whole movie had been like that). Saved from my zero rating only because it's better directed than most horror flick languishing on the shelf. the actors at least tried with what they were given & weren't to bad & there was some humorous closing credits at the end which I thought were funny. Followed By FEAR OF CLOWNS 2

*1/2 stars

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10 out of 16 people found the following review useful:

Pennywise this is not.

5/10
Author: ZombieKilla81 from Hawaii, USA
5 March 2006

Clowns are damn creepy, everyone knows that. The mere sight of a clown is enough to make many people uncomfortable, myself included. So, in theory using a clown as your villain should make for some easy scares. Eh, no.

A young girl is terrorized by visions of a murderous clown, one that resembles a figure she has painted before. She passes it off as dementia until people start dying and the clown turns out to be very real.

For a film trying to be a slasher there isn't a whole lot of slashing. It's 30+ minutes of boring dialogue, sloppy acting and dull plot development before any one dies, and even then it's a lame death followed by even more lengthy segment of boredom before anything else remotely interesting happens. To top off the whole package the film clocks in at over 100 hefty minutes; slasher movies are not meant to run that long.

On the plus side, the film does start turning out some decent deaths and enough blood and gore later in the film to keep itself from falling apart and the clown himself is rather unsettling to look at.

Sadly, this is nothing more that another unremarkable entry in the modern DtV horror scene.

5/10

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5 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

poorly done

1/10
Author: toadcream from Melville, NY
7 November 2006

this was one of those movies that you go out and take a chance in the video store. You see a b-movie that you've never heard of with a cool box and cool title. Then you get home, hoping you've found yourself a gem, but when you pop it in your DVD player you realize you have to reach for the Ben & Jerry's to stave off the depression. From the novice acting, to the bad writing to the cheesy special effects... everything was just plain bad. Even right down to something I never even notice... the editing. There are some downright noticeably bad cuts that boggle the mind. I listened to a little of the audio commentary and the director kept talking about how much attention they paid to the audio, but I never once heard him voice his production concerns about any visual aspects i.e. poor lighting, amateur camera angles. Stay away from this one.

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