Memorable quotes for
The Battle of Shaker Heights (2003) More at IMDbPro »

Kelly: [about his father] He's a VH1 documentary without the music.
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Lance: Why are you dicking with me, you little dick. You wanna play, dick face?"
Kelley: Wait, you just used "dick" as a noun, adjective, and a verb.
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[after Kelly speaks out in class]
Principal Holmstead: Kelly we have to stop meeting like this.
Kelly: I mean, it's not my fault the teachers here suck.
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Principal Holmstead: Growing up is a hard enough thing as it is.
Kelly: Is that what your box of tissues is for?
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Principal Holmstead: How am I ever going to get through to you?
Kelly Ernswiler: Well, advertising executives use status and sex to appeal to my demographic.
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Bart Bowland: You need to stop living in a fucking fantasy world.
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Kelly: So you invited me to your wedding?
Tabby: [crying] There isn't going to be a wedding. Minor kissed this woman he works with.
Kelly: Honestly, I didn't think you two were right for eachother. Like that painting. When you walk in you know exactly what it is, but when you look at it closely...
Tabby: I don't need your bullshit right now.
Kelly: I'm just trying to understand you, Tabby.
Tabby: I'm not as complicated as you think.
Kelly: I didn't say you were complicated.
[Tabby starts to cry, and Kelly goes to sit next to her]
Kelly: Don't cry. Please, don't cry.
Tabby: [laughing] You like me, don't you?
Kelly: Of course.
Tabby: No, like, you really like me.
Kelly: I think your amazing.
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Kelly Ernswiler: A funny thing just happened to me. I thought you were dead on the couch.
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