Simon Wolf & Bud Lee strike out in pointless Haven vehicle
The talented team of producer/writer Simon Wolf and director Bud Lee score a goose-egg in this followup to the Haven vehicle for Sin City "Magic Touch". It makes me loath to watch either Part 1 or 3, though the first volume has a far better cast (per the BTS short subject included here).
Main culprit is George Kaplan, a screenwriter who I admire but who seems to be on an ego-trip this time out. Besides contributing to the script, he acts in a major role as Haven's grandpa. Affecting a cutesy accent a la Jackie Mason, he keeps popping up or going invisible for no laughs, as a pesky old witch interfering with Haven's life at college. He wants her to transfer to Black Magic University, as he doesn't like or trust humans, the folks who inhabit her Wyndamere University. Given the success of the Harry Potter books when this video was shot in 2001, it is unfortunate that Kaplan didn't set the Magic Touch series at the Black Magic School, which would have instantly made for a more interesting movie.
Instead he's sent by Haven to observe the folks on campus, in order to change his mind about them. The expected antics are stupid, as is the feature as a whole.
Much footage is given over to the college dean played by Mike Horner in one of his worst, over-acted performances. He plays a paranoid individual, dressing in military garb with his office decorated like a camouflaged outpost on some battlefront. Ava Vincent shows up as a therapist, sent by the school's board to psychoanalyze Horner, and all that results is a fantasy sex scene of him and her, interrupted of course by the magical appearance of Kaplan to disrupt things.
Kaplan's script never advances the nominal story, merely stringing together generic sex scenes that kill time. Tabitha Stevens guest stars as a rather old-looking sorority girl (in fact aged 31 at time of shooting), who has Haven give her some lesbian loving in return for being considered for membership. Other beauties popping up for sex include Lola, Allysin Chaynes and the wonderful Monica Mayhem. IMDb character match-ups to their names seem in error.
Kaplan's self-indulgent screenplay includes silliness, such as a fraternity named Felt Delta Thi and sorority Maken Felta Cri, and early on he makes an in-joke about H.P. Lovecraft. Definitely a video that tarnishes his Adult Cinema legacy.
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