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3D: However, J and Shaggy own Psychopathic Records and the next thing you know, Tom Dub is being forced, and I underline forced, he is forced to wrestle, right there, Ding Dong Bundy, who looks like a giant penis in a broken black condom.

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Violent J: Remind me never to hire ugly fat bitches again.

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Gweedo: And now Iron shiek mounting him like a fagg- oh wait it's a camel clutch!

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Violent J: This is Evil Dead. He's our fuckin' dead body wrestler and he's gonna take it all.

Shaggy 2 Dope: All we're saying is we own the federation. That's all we're saying.

Violent J: That's right so everything goes our way. And if you don't like it, fuck you. So, what you gonna do when the Insane Clown Posse runs wild on you, mother facko?

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3D: and now that manager chick is gonna turn on Angel, as if anyone watching gives a fuck!

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Gweedo: JCW, wrestling by the Juggalos, for the juggalos!

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The Iron Sheik: If you want to see Sheik put jabroni in Camel Clutch, give me hell yeah.

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King Kong Bundy: Yak, yak, yak, move over son, the great Bundy's got something to say. Who the hell is Tom Dub? I don't care if some record company, some perverts, a bunch of heroin addicts think that you're going to be using the great Bundy as a stepping stone. Son, you're going down, you're getting a five-count and don't ever think of doing anything in wrestling again.

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Gweedo: [During the Abdullah the Butcher-Rude Boy match] No sell, no sell.

3D: Big sell!

Gweedo: They should call you Tom Selleck.

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3D: There is speculation that Evil Dead is really Jumpsteady under a stupid rubber mask. Jumpsteady is the brother of Violent J. Violent J and Shaggy own JCW.

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Gweedo: The rules of this battle royal are simple. You get thrown over the top fucking rope, you're out.

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Truth Martini: Can you believe this shit? Look what they're fucking putting us into.

Terek the Great: I know man, I know this is fucking bullshit. I'm a fucking cruiserweight wrestler. I wrestle in Japan. I don't need this shit. I'm not a fucking stupid clown.

Truth Martini: Look at this shit, this shit's fucking choking me too.

Terek the Great: Dude, I know, man this is fucking bullshit. I ain't no fucking clown.

Truth Martini: I don't believe we're fucking doing this.

Terek the Great: Well, we are.

Truth Martini: Let me let you in on something. I'm only doing it for the money

[rubs fingers together]

Terek the Great: I'm gonna put it to you like this. I don't give a fuck about how much J and Shaggy are paying us to do this. I ain't going out there and fucking jobbing for those two fuckers. They're not even wrestlers.

Truth Martini: They got us jobbing?

Terek the Great: They're not even fucking wrestlers. I ain't jobbing for them. But wait, it's alright. I've got a plan up my sleeve. And let me tell you something, the Clowns' plans aren't going as smoothly as planned tonight. Trust me.

Truth Martini: [laughing] Feeling better.

[laughing. Picks up costume]

Truth Martini: Fuck!

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'Luscious' Johnny Stark: [Truth Martini makes his way out for the battle royal] You know, I hear that his big brother, Bad Boy Barry Brunzell, was thinking of coming to JCW.

Gweedo: That's just speculation, Caruthis Martellini would never have him do that.

'Luscious' Johnny Stark: [trying to hold back his laughter] Ok.

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3D: Terek lost the match and has to wrestle as Doink the Fuck, but we'll get to that later.

Gweedo: [Fat Fuck Barrel Boy makes his way out for the battle royal] Fat Fuck Barrel Boy!

'Luscious' Johnny Stark: Speaking of fuck.

3D: A big fat fucking fat guy in a barrel, what could be better? JCW at its finest.

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Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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