Alexander, the King of Macedonia, leads his legions against the giant Persian Empire. After defeating the Persians he leads his Army across the then known world venturing further than any Westerner had ever gone all the way to India. Written by
Was nominated for six Razzies, but did not "win" any. See more »
Alexander asks Darius' daughter how she wishes to be treated, she replies, "like a princess," and he grants her wish. In reality, Alexander asked the question to the Indian king Porus. When Porus replied "like a king", he won Alexander's respect and became one of his allies. See more »
Our world is gone now. Smashed by the wars. Now I am the keeper of his body, embalmed here in the Egyptian ways. I followed him as Pharaoh, and have now ruled 40 years. I am the victor. But what does it all mean when there is not one left to remember - the great cavalry charge at Gaugamela, or the mountains of the Hindu Kush when we crossed a 100,000-man army into India? He was a god, Cadmos. Or as close as anything I've ever seen.
See more »
Alexander is essentially about this Russian sounding babe (played by Ms. Jolie) who marries into this big Oirish family, is driven to preferring snakes because her husband only has one eye, and begins dying her little boy's hair blonde. Then it all kicks off, Colin Farrell gets his eyebrows bleached and goes off in a flouncy tantrum to conquer the world. Meanwhile Jared Leto stands around with a twisty Cher hairdo, gazing longingly at bottle-blondie Colin, who every now and then gazes back with tears in his eyes and whispers 'Oy cahnt live if livin' is without you...' So anyway, about half way through that really handsome guy from The Book Group (the one in the wheelchair) and those porridge commercials shows up, but he has a different hairdresser... he stands around a lot, proving that sensible haircuts WERE possible in ancient times. I think he loses his razor at one point, but finds it again eventually... later Tim Piggott-Smith has to smush his hands around inside a dead animal, but they cut all his lines, so of course it all makes PERFECT sense.
Then the elephants come...
159 of 263 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?