Ray Porter: As Ray Porter watches Mirabelle walk away he feels a loss. How is it possible, he thinks, to miss a woman whom he kept at a distance so that when she was gone he would not miss her. Only then does he realize that wanting part of her and not all of her had hurt them both and how he cannot justify his actions except that... well... it was life.
Lisa Cramer: You want some advice? You never call him. But if he calls you you talk to him, then act like you have another call, keep him on hold for a long time. Like longer than you think is passable. And break dates. Always break dates. Right around the holidays cus then he's just stuck. And fellatio, the sooner the better. And allot. Act like you love it. After he's aditcted, cut him off. That's when you got him.
Mirabelle: Ya, I couldn't do all that.
Lisa Cramer: How come?
Mirabelle: I'm from Vermont.
Mirabelle: Are you the kind of person that takes time to get to know, and then once you get to know them... they're fabulous?
Jeremy Kraft: Yes, absolutely... What?
Mirabelle: Are we going in?
Jeremy Kraft: Go in? Oh, no. I just thought we'd look at it.
Mirabelle: So... we would just sit here, then?
Jeremy Kraft: Yeah, or walk around. This place is called City Walk. It got eight out of ten in my date book. It's not called "City-Go-and-See-a-Movie". Tickets are, like, ten bucks too, so...
Jeremy Kraft: I've been reading a lot of books on tape...
Jeremy Kraft: [walking away from his car, he pretends he has automatic locks] Chirp-chirp.
female radio personality: A woman needs to be held, even, and science has shown this, if its with someone she doesn't care about. Protective hormones are released, and the amount of hormones released depends on the degree to which she is held. The first and best is the complete surround. He wraps you in both arms, whispers how beautiful you are. Second best is the 'arm around.' He is next to you but with one arm around you. Third is he's just next to you on his elbow, but he rests his hand on your stomach and looks at you. Fourth is you snuggling up to him with your head on his chest, while he looks away into space. But when the first best happens, you feel completely, wonderfully like a woman.
Ray Porter: Mirabelle Buttersfield moved from Vermont hoping to begin her life. And now she is stranded in the vast openness of LA. She keeps working to make connections, but the pile of near misses is starting to overwhelm her. What Mirabelle needs is an omniscient voice to illuminate and spotlight her and to inform everyone that this one has value, this one standing behind the counter in the glove department and to find her counterpart and bring him to her.
Mirabelle: Ray, why don't you love me? Are you just biding your time with me?
Ray Porter: I thought you understood.
Mirabelle: So, I can either hurt now or hurt later.
Lisa Cramer: You know what else I like?
Jeremy Kraft: Hm?
Lisa Cramer: I think I like Ray Porter.
Jeremy Kraft: Hm. I can't wait to meet him.
Ray Porter: When I'm in New York next week, I decided to look for an apartment there.
Mirabelle: To move there?
Ray Porter: Just a place to stay while I'm there. No more luggage. Whoo-hoo!
Mirabelle: Like a crash pad. You lucky mister.
Ray Porter: Actually, I'll look for a three-bedroom in case I meet someone and have kids.
Jeremy Kraft: Amplifiers are so under-appreciated.
Jeremy Kraft: They could be so cool looking and nobody cares about design, you know. It pisses me off! Mac designs a cool computer, EVERYBODY goes out and they buy it! And... a band! A rock n' roll band... lives or dies by their amplifiers... and they're sold... like fridgerators. Hell, it's that ridiculous, come on! The amp should have mystique! I mean, yeah. I mean, an amp should be sold like cool things! You know, like cars! Like swords! Not like appliances. And that is why my, that is why my boss' business is going under. Because... he, he'd use it all as merch.
Jeremy Kraft: That's merchandise.
Voice-over: Some nights alone he thinks of her, and some nights alone she thinks of him. Some nights these thoughts occur at the same moment and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
Jeremy Kraft: Congratulations. You've officially gone on a date with Jeremy. Don't forget to hold the handle when you lock the door.
[On the phone]
Jeremy Kraft: It's Jeremy.
Lisa Cramer: Who?
Jeremy Kraft: Sorry, speakerphone. It's Jeremy.
Lisa Cramer: Who's Jeremy?
Jeremy Kraft: What do you mean, who's Jeremy?
Lisa Cramer: Have we met?
Jeremy Kraft: Have we... it's Jeremy from last night, you little devil. You're so funny.
Lisa Cramer: Oh, you mean we met at the gallery?
Jeremy Kraft: I love it when you... Yeah, we did all those... Remember we were doing all those Oriental positions, and you called me "big daddy".
Lisa Cramer: Oh, Ray!
Jeremy Kraft: Oh, Ray!
Jeremy Kraft: Oh, Ray! Oh, Ray! Oh, Ray! Oh, Ray! Oh, Ray!
Lisa Cramer: What?
Jeremy Kraft: You don't know who this is?
Lisa Cramer: Yeah, this is Ray Porter from last night.
Jeremy Kraft: Ok, who is Ray Porter?