Nick is a struggling dentist in Canada. A new neighbor moves in, and he discovers that it is Jimmy "The Tulip" Teduski. His wife convinces him to go to Chicago and inform the mob boss who wants Jimmy dead.
Thanks to falsified dental records supplied by his former neighbor Nicholas Oz Oseransky, retired hitman Jimmy The Tulip Tudeski now spends his days compulsively cleaning his house and perfecting his culinary skills with his wife, Jill, a purported assassin who has yet to pull off a clean hit. Suddenly, an uninvited and unwelcome connection to their past unexpectedly shows up on Jimmy and Jill's doorstep: it's Oz, and he's begging them to help him rescue his wife from the Hungarian mob. To complicate matters even further, the men, who are out to get Oz, are led by Lazlo Gogolak, a childhood rival of Jimmy's and another notorious hitman. Oz, Jimmy and Jill will have to go the whole nine yards--and then some--to manage the mounting Mafioso mayhem. Written by
Sujit R. Varma
The tattoo on Jimmy the Tulip's back is the logo of the production company. See more »
Before Strabo falls down the stairs, his hands are tied together and his arms are tied to the chair. As he falls, the chair breaks and his hands fly apart so he can control his tumble backward down the stairs. Afterward, his hands are tied again. See more »
Los Angeles. How interesting. All right, we'll get going and cut them off at the piss.
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Not much nutrition here, I'm afraid. Kapner really stretches this stuff thin - as thin as cardboard, and about as tasteless.
This time there are more borrowings - the hapless Perry plays it more or less as Belushi's part in "The Man With One Red Shoe". Pollack wears the Sopranos 'Uncle Junior' glasses, and he has nowhere to go but in the direction of greater and greater excess. The gangsters and hit men all have post-"Analyze This" issues.
On the plus side, Willis knows he has to mix things up, so he plays this as though he's 'outside' the narrative, and 'in his own movie' - playing it more between the movie reality and us. Peet competently keeps up her end of the equation.
But this is beyond anyone's skill to save - not enough calories here to thrive on.
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