Edit

(2002 Video Game)

Quotes

Spider-Man: There's nothing Peter Parker can do at this point, but Spider-Man's a different story!

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Spider-Man: A car-jacker killed an old man earlier today. The killer's a skull. Where is he?

Skull: I can't tell you, he'd kill me.

Spider-Man: What makes you think I won't?

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Spider-Man: Life sure is strange sometimes. No matter how long you want to hold on to a moment, you can't stop time from moving on.

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Shocker: There is no way we're giving up a score this big to some clown in red tights!

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Green Goblin: There's no need for us to fight!

Spider-Man: Yeah, once you stop lobbing bombs at me, we'll see about that!

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Spider-Man: [to Shocker] So you must be..."Quilt-Man"..."Padded Pete"..."Mister Triple-Ply?" Oh! I got it! "The Cushion"!

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Spider-Man: Uncle Ben... nothing could fill the hole left when he died. Those wounds never really heal.

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Green Goblin: You don't seem like you're enjoying yourself! Aren't you having any fun?

Spider-Man: Um... no.

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Green Goblin: How can you be so naive? These people would never lay a finger to help you!

Spider-Man: Well since they don't have the power to fly or bend steel with their bare hands I can't say I blame them!

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Green Goblin: Tough day at the office, hun? Mine was a killer!

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Green Goblin: Tell Harry... I'm sorry...

Spider-Man: I'm sorry too.

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Spider-Man: Who are you? wait let me guess, "The Emerald Elf"?

Green Goblin: Me? I'm just a concerned citizen, helping to clean up our fair city!

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Green Goblin: Can't you see we're cut from the same cloth? We aren't like normal people!

Spider-Man: Speak for yourself!

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Green Goblin: Run! Run! 'Fast as you can...

Spider-Man: The ginger-bread man you're *not*!

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Spider-Man: Ah, yes, the old Swinging Log of Doom trick. That trick never gets old.

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Spider-Man: [while fighting some robots] You aren't from the future or something lame like that, right?

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Green Goblin: Running away? I'm not done with you yet!

Spider-Man: That's what I'm afraid of!

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[to Scorpion]

Spider-Man: Careful! You're gonna poke your eye out with that thing!

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[to Scorpion]

Spider-Man: Going to the bathroom must be a nightmare for you.

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Spider-Man: [to Goblin] Didn't I see you in a dubbed-rubber-monster movie?

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Spider-Man: Note to self: Scale Crazy-Bird-Man's lair from the outside, next time!

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Spider-Man: You shouldn't be flying around at your age, Vulture, you'll hurt yourself!

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[to Scorpion]

Spider-Man: This guy is a few sandwiches short of a picnic. I better help him out.

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Spider-Man: [to Shocker] You're crazier than a soup sandwich.

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Spider-Man: Give my regards to my fans in the slammer!

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[Spider-Man walks to the Shocker as he lies defeated on the ground]

Spider-Man: Looks like your flying friend's getting your share of the loot, too. Where'd be get off to, anyway?

[shocker groans as Spider-Man picks him up]

Shocker: If I don't get mine, Vulture isn't getting his. He had some workshop set up, up in the old clock tower, on the Lower East Side.

[Spider-Man drops the Shocker to the ground]

Spider-Man: Vulture, huh? Thanks, Shocker. Give my regards to my fans in the slammer!

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[after knocking down an opponent with an attack]

Spider-Man: Wow. Good looks and a sparkling wit. Oh, wait - that's me!

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Shocker: Come on, freak! You need to learn a lesson! And Shocker's School of Hard Knocks is now open!

Spider-Man: Give me a break, Shock! I can't believe you have any class, let alone a whole school worth!

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[while fighting the Shocker]

Spider-Man: It's good to know 'subtle' isn't in your vocabulary.

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[after blasting Spider-Man with his vibro-shock gauntlets]

Shocker: I'm gonna grind you up and spit you out!

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[while fighting Spider-Man]

Shocker: Ready to rock and roll, web-slinger!

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Shocker: Welcome to a world of pain!

Spider-Man: You're embarassing yourself, Shocker!

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[while fighting the Shocker]

Spider-Man: Do those gloves come with a puree setting, too?

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Spider-Man: Wow! That kink in my back is gone! You're like the world's most dangerous physical therapist!

Shocker: Laugh it up, smart guy!

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[while fighting Spider-Man]

Shocker: I'm gonna shut your mouth for you!

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Spider-Man: Trick or Treat!

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Scorpion: The shadow puppet watches all!

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Spider-Man: Let's talk about this, Scorpion! You need help.

Scorpion: Talk? No, no talking, you can't take me back!

Spider-Man: I wouldn't even know where to take you back to.

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Scorpion: Are you after me too? I think you are!

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Vulture: You can't match my agility!

Harry Osborn: You're right. I can *beat* you agility!

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Vulture: What's the matter, Spider-Man? Too fast for you?

Spider-Man: Hey! Come back! The food at the old folks home wasn't that bad, was it?

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Green Goblin: Let's find some new people to play with, shall we?

Spider-Man: I'd like to vote against that.

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Spider-Man: [during basic training] Wow! I can't believe how much stronger I've become!

Tour Guide: Good for you. Listen, if you want to beat up some more bad guys, simply knock on the door by pressing the "punch" button. When you're done, web swing over to your next objective. I'm going to go get a ham sandwich.

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Tour Guide: [during basic training when hitting a hidden question mark]

[sigh]

Tour Guide: You just HAD to jump down here, didn't you. Well than I guess I should tell you something... ahh...

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Tour Guide: [during basic training] Web swing over to your next objective. If you can't find your next objective, I can't help you. Turn off the machine and walk away.

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Spider-Man: [during basic training] This is incredible! Am I really doing this?

Tour Guide: Well YOU'RE easily impressed.

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Tour Guide: Okay, if you want to go over this again, or if you just plain missed me which, Hah! Who could blame you? You can access basic training from the menue anytime you want. Now follow your compass to the exit. Good luck! I said... good luck. Good luck means 'Good bye'. See, there's nothing more to see here... you're done, that's a wrap, it's over, got it? I want you to understand, accept, move on with your life! For crying out loud, these people!

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Tour Guide: [after you jump off a building in basic training and hit the ground and then get transported to where you jumped off] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Careful there, Captain Jumpy. Now since you're starting here we're going to let you get away with moves like that. But once you're out in the big bad city, passing below a certain height means "Sayonara Spidey." Try not to let yourself get too low.

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New Yorker: Hey look! It's Spider-Man!

Spider-Man: Just don't use that "bird-plane" metaphor. That's the other guy.

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[Army of Darkness at the start of basic training]

Tour Guide: Get the gum out of your ears and listen good.

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Spider-Man: This is how my story begins, my uncle Ben and Aunt May raised me like a son, they never had much money though. I thought my powers could make up for that. The last time I saw Uncle Ben alive, we argued. I took out my frustration in the ring, Poor old Bonesaw hadn't even saw me comin'.

Bone Saw McGraw: WAH! NO MORE MR. NICEGUY!

Spider-Man: The fight promoter cheated me, so I didn't think it was my problem he got robbed.

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Shocker: Don't panic boys. It was only a matter of time before we had to deal with Spider-Man. Let's take care of security and round up some hostages!

Security Guard: [to his walkie-talkie as Shocker's men approach him] Uh, we have a situation here! We need backup!

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Security Guard: I eat punks like you for breakfast.

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Mary Jane: That creep! Give him a punch for me!

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[Mary Jane gently grabs Spider-Man by the arm and then kisses his cheek]

Mary Jane: Go get 'im, Tiger!

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[on inter-com in the bowling alley]

Tour Guide: Attention bowlers! Attention bowlers! Tuesday night is Evil Robot Night!

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[on inter-com in the bowling alley]

Tour Guide: On Saturdays, super villains bowl free with proper I.D.

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[on inter-com in the bowling alley]

Tour Guide: Will the owner of the white Dante van, license number "SHOCK ME", please remove your car from the handicapped spot? Loser.

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[on inter-com in the bowling alley]

Tour Guide: We have a special on chili fries. Tonight - with chili!

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[on inter-com in the bowling alley]

Tour Guide: Ball return on lane three is out of order. Pin setter on lane four is out of order. This whole *bowling alley* is out of order! *YOU'RE out of order!*

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[while fighting the Shocker]

Spider-Man: So you're called the Shocker, but you don't use electricity. I don't get it.

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[while chasing a fleeing criminal]

Spider-Man: Top in your class at cowardly running, I see!

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[while chasing a fleeing criminal]

Spider-Man: Here, boy! Come on!

[whistles like he's calling for a dog]

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[as Spider-Man swings overhead]

Woman: Get a job, menace!

Spider-Man: Ah, my adoring public!

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[Spider-Man swings away on his web ropes]

Spider-Man: Okay, I have those shots for J.J. Now to get back to the Bugle, collect my money - and get my rent paid!

[a flying robot hovers down to attack Spider-Man]

Spider-Man: Uh-oh! I don't know what that thing is, but something tells me it isn't friendly!

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[while being attacked by a flying robot]

Spider-Man: Jane! Stop this crazy thing!

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[while being attacked by a flying robot]

Spider-Man: Just for reference, are you guys recyclable?

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[while being attacked by a flying robot]

Spider-Man: I know I've made some enemies, but this is a bit much!

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[knocks an enemy down with a punch]

Spider-Man: Let me introduce you to - my fist!

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[while sneaking up inside Vulture's bell tower]

Spider-Man: Must be a pain to get groceries up here.

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Vulture: You're becoming a thorn in my side! Today, you die, Spider-Man!

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[while Spider-Man web-swings to catch up with the Vulture in the rain, the Vulture causes damage to a water tower on a rooftop]

Vulture: Those people look thirsty, don't they? Why don't I serve them a drink?

Spider-Man: I think the folks down there are wet enough already!

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[while wall-crawling in Vulture's bell tower]

Spider-Man: Who's your landlord, Vulture? Quasimodo?

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[after knocking an opponent down with a handspring attack]

Spider-Man: Shall we dance?

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Green Goblin: You're boring me, Spiderman!

Spider-Man: Hey where you going?

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Green Goblin: I've been burning bridges all day, I think I'll just knock this one down.

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Spider-Man: Squirrels must love you because you're nuts

Scorpion: Make jokes!

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Spider-Man: Come on Shock, you know I can't let you run around down here without a chaperon

Shocker: Webslinger, you've been riding me all day I'm gonna finish this once and for all!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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