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|Index||11 reviews in total|
Once again Ted V Mikels delivers the goods, an absolute pleasure to watch Corpse Grinders 2. I saw the Original Corpse Grinders as a kid,and was blown away by it, I then sought out other TVM titles,.... eventually many years later I managed to see CORPSE GRINDERS 2, and WOW what fun.Forget the run of the mill SCREAM et al modern "horror" crap, what you have here is a Movie that brings back ENJOYMENT to your living room. AMAZING plot, how anyone can think of it all is beyond me, if you liked the first see the 2nd. Its sure to AMAZE! AAA+++
This terrible sequel started off talking about alien cat people who were coming to Earth and it seemed very promising.Sadly, the aliens really have nothing to do with the story and are only on screen for about ten minutes. It turns out the movie is actually the first movie again with some minor changes. Somehow the cat food factory still exists and now it's owned by the nephews of the original guys. To make it even lamer, the nephews are exactly like their uncles. There is a doctor and nurse with the same names as the ones in the first movie and of course they have a cat at their office. There's a Caleb in this one too but this time he wasn't already digging up bodies, the cat food guys ask him to do it. Plus his wife carries a teddy bear instead of a baby doll. The factory is always locked this time but every time a person gingerly knocks on the door every one inside easily hears it and let's them in. Other than that it's the exact same movie. They have the same scenes and say the same things. Maybe if it had been 30 years since I saw the first one I wouldn't have noticed it was the same movie but sadly it's been less than 30 hours since I saw it, so I do. I think maybe it wouldn't be so bad if you haven't seen the first one but I can't recommend this movie to anyone. Did I mention that it has the worst acting I have ever seen? The only person who comes close to seeming like they have ever even heard of acting is Caleb's wife.On to part 3......
This movie is AWESOME. I watched it the other day with my cousin Jay-Jay. He said it was alright, but i think it RULEZZZ! I mean, it's so cool. Ted V. Mikels is so brave and smart. He made a movie totally unlike those terrible Hollywood films, like the Matrix and STop or my Mom will Shoot. It could have been better, though. I like ninjas and pirates. I also like that big talon that the funny man wears. I think he's the coolest guy since that Domino Pizza claymation guy. Not only does this movie look really cool, like those out-of-focus movies my dad made of my birthday when I turned 6. BUt it tells a complex tale with dozens of characters that seem to be totally unrelated, but they all meet up in the end. It's genius how this web is woven to make everything meet up. I wish Ted V. Mikels would make a sequel. But it needs more aliens. And a pirate.
Corpse Grinders 2, The (2000)
* (out of 4)
If you watch the making of featurette to the original 1971 film director Ted V. Mikels says that the movie made over $190,000 in one city in just one week. I don't doubt this claim but I do wonder why he'd wait thirty-years before releasing a sequel because there's very little doubt that anyone in 2000 was wanting such a film. The "sequel" is pretty much just a remake with added pieces of other stories thrown in. The nephews of the men from the first film are back in business and uses corpses to make their cat food. The cats eat this junk and eventually start attacking their owners. The "new" story added here is a battle in outer space where cat people are being overtaken by dog people so the cats must come to Earth and try to find cat food that their planet can survive on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up THE CORPSE GRINDERS 2 and the end results aren't nearly as good as one would hope but then again it's doubtful too many had high hopes considering how long it took this movie to come out. From what I've read about Mikels he seems like a wonderful guy and what interviews I've seen it appears he's a wonderful man who loves to make movies. Perhaps that's why he decided to revisit the original film all these years later as two years later he'd also make a sequel to his film THE ASTRO-ZOMBIES. I'm guessing Mikels love of making movies is the main reason this sucker here clocks in at 100-minutes, which is at least half an hour too long. At least the original movie ran under 75-minutes but this thing here just keeps going and going with new subplots coming up every few scenes. The "remake" portion of the film isn't too bad as the idea of humans being used as cat food is rather funny and fans of the original film will probably enjoy seeing the director's new version of scenes. The problem is with everything else as there's way too much useless story including everything going on between the two owners and their ways of getting the corpses. The performances are all rather bland as you'd expect but we do get to see Dolores Fuller in a few scenes selling the cat food. She wrote songs for Elvis but she's best remembered for being Ed Wood's girlfriend and appearing in his films like GLEN OR GLENDA? and BRIDE OF THE MONSTER. She certainly doesn't do anything ground-breaking here but it's nice seeing her. It's doubtful too many people outside of those who want to explore Mikels' filmmography are going to view this thing and that's probably good. It's certainly a very bad movie but at least the director holds everything together and makes something comprehensible.
The original exploitation classic-though far from enjoyable on almost any level concerning some guys who turn cats into human flesh eating monsters because the cat food they make is made with people is remade with scifi elements added. The cats can't get enough and when the flesh tainted food runs out the cats turn on their owners. Poorly put together on almost every level this is an example of the absolute bottom of the barrel material that used to actually play movie theaters in the early 1970's updated with alien cat and dog races battling for supremacy. Director Ted Mikel is a hack, but is so lovable a person (I generally like the guy thanks to his smile inducing interviews and commentary tracks) that you can pretty much excuse the garbage he mostly turned out. Mikels wanted to make films and he didn't care how they turned out so long as he was producing something. More power to him, but I wish he wouldn't subject us to his home movies
I am a huge fan of Ted V Mikels and the original "Corpse Grinders" is the main reason why but this is quite possibly the worst film I have ever seen. Even the brilliant casting of the legendary Liz Renay ("Desperate Living") could not save this worthless piece of garbage. This film should serve as a lesson to all past, present and future film makers...when you have a film as successful as the original "Corpse Grinders" was you should probably leave sleeping dogs lie and you should definitely not try to revitalize it over twenty years later (unless you have the financial backing to pull of a superior sequel such as Herschel Gordon Lewis did with "Blood Feast 2: All U can Eat") Even if you do decide to do this you should probably spend a little bit more money than you did on the original and for god's sake...NEVER film a movie onto video...why do film makers even attempt to do this when everyone knows the quality is going to turn out hideous...I personally have yet to see one film made in this fashion that's even worth the powder to blow it to hell...if you can't afford to make a sequel that is better than your original film then sell the rights of the film to someone who can...and what was Ted V Mikels thinking about (or smoking) when he wrote this god-awful script? I mean come on, dog and cat "aliens" from another planet? A cardboard box painted to look like a devastating machine capable of grinding up human bodies...bones and clothes and all? If any of these actors, aside from Liz Renay, were paid more than five dollars for their hideous performances than they are grossly overpaid! Avoid this film at all costs and watch the original instead.
Want a great recipe for failure? Take a s****y plot, add in some weak,
completely undeveloped characters and than throw in the worst special
effects a horror movie has known. Let stew for a week (the amount of
probably spent making this trash). The result is Corpse Grinders, a
that takes bad movies to dangerous and exotically low places.
The movie utterly blew. My words cannot convey how painful it was to watch. This is not one of those bad movies that you and your friends can sit around and make fun of. This is not Plan 9 From Outer Space. This is a long, boring, sad waste of time. Corpse Grinders II is the biggest waste of energy and talent I have ever seen. I depresses me when I realize that people actually took time out of their lives to act in this shit, if you can call it acting. But than again, when you have poor direction, poor storywriting, poor everything, acting is the last thing to criticize.
This movie is like a huge, disgusting turd that you yearn to quickly flush out of existence, fearful that a friend or loved one might somehow see it. I really with I could somehow destroy every copy of this film, so it will not pollute the minds of aspiring filmmakers. Thank you, Ted V. Mikels, for giving me new found respect for every movie I have ever seen. You have shown me what is truly awful, and why I should appreciate all those movies that are merely crappy or boring.
In a far away Galaxy is a planet called Ceta. It's native people
worship cats. But the dog people wage war upon these feline loving
people and they have no choice but to go to Earth and grind people up
for food. This is one of the stupidest f#@k!ng ideas for a movie I've
seen. Leave it to Ted Mikels to make a movie more incompetent than the
already low standard he set in previous films. It's like he enjoying
playing in a celluloid game of Limbo. How low can he go? The only
losers in the scenario are US the viewer. Mr. Mikels and his silly
little handlebar mustache actually has people who STILL buy this crap.
My Grade: F
DVD Extras: Commentary by Ted Mikels; the Story behind the Making of (9 and a half minutes); 17 minutes, 15 seconds of Behind the scenes footage; Ted Mikels filmography; and Trailers for "The Worm Eaters" "Girl in Gold Boots", "the Doll Squad", "Ten Violent Women" (featuring nudity), "Blood Orgy of the She Devils", & "the Corpse Grinders"
Ted V. Mikels used to make films. I'll go as far as to say great films, for what they were. Somewhere along the line he forgot how to and he decided to make this home video which he mistakenly believes to be a "movie". Please avoid this at all costs, and speaking of costs...if you can't afford to shoot on film Mr. Mikels, don't bother at all. - EDDIE WRETCH
The plot of Corpse Grinders 2 is very much similar to the original
Corpse Grinders, what is left that is different from the other film
consists of weird aliens.
It is my belief that this film would be the #1 worst film on IMDb - if anyone had actually watched it. The plot is disconnected and, in several (way too many) instances, makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. The real wonder here is why in the world was this sequel created to such an unsuccessful and horrendous (but still somewhat better) film.
I would highly recommend this film if you enjoy watching terrible movies for a good laugh.
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