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Strong Kids, Safe Kids (V) More at IMDbPro »

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13 out of 14 people found the following review useful:

And they say that it's difficult to blend humor and horror

Author: Billy_Lovelady from Uranus
17 September 2004

I don't remember this video too well, but I still have some of the lyrics from the songs BRANDED on my brain.

I recall that this video had some emotionally-stunted man dressed up in little boy "fetish wear" -- what he thinks a little boy should dress like. And he's in a playground, singing, with a little guitar. Singing stuff like, "Penis! Is what boys have down in front. Penis! Is the word, and it seems blunt!" And then, "Vulva! Is what girls have down below. Vulva! When she's naked it will show." And let's not forget, "OUR anus! Is a useful thing indeed. The anus, gives relief in times of need."

Yes, not your anus or my anus. OUR anus. And it gives him relief in times of need. I remember my friends and I joking on this whole video, but this guy in particular.

That should probably clue you in to what you're getting into when watching this video. I do recall that Henry Winkler was on this as well, because I think he was playing The Fonze and saying stuff like, "Hhheeyyyy, it's not cool for Uncle Pervert to touch you there." And then he smacked the jukebox. Or something.

This isn't for little kids anymore, this if for people who watched it when they were little kids and want to cringe down memory lane. Modern kids will be like, "Who is this 'fonzee'?" I think there were plenty of other flavor-of-the-month early-80s so-called icons that will scare the children, rather than tantalize them.

There's also somebody with scary teeth on this video, if memory serves.

If little kids are going to be subjected to this, however, remind them that if they see a man in their playground, dressed in little boy fetish wear, wielding a guitar, singing about "our anus," they should avoid him at all costs.

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8 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

The most @#$$ed up video I have ever seen!!

Author: ronald sylvesterler reaganagangan the 17th
14 December 2002

Oh man, everyone must somehow find a copy of this and watch it, it is messed up. I can't imagine how these people could possibly have taken this seriously at the time. The songs are priceless and horrifying "There are 3 types of thouches I know. Stop, Heart, and I don't know" "My anus releves me in times of anguish" Penis and vulva" It's a cult classic just waiting to be born, and I'm just going to be the one with the audacity to declare it so. I don't know how you can get it, my roommate found it in a thrift store for a dollar. I actually remember seeing it as a kid. Its a must watch though, trust me. "The Fonz says No!"

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6 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

Tweety and Tallywacker

10/10
Author: jklein8787 from Jamwelkowski, IL
16 July 2003

Oh man, this video is a classic. I saw this in my Cub Scout troup and none of us could keep a straight face. There is a song about penis and vagina, Henry Winkler as the Fonz talking about private parts, different names you can call your penis or vagina, and John Ritter. This tape was suppose to teach kids about not talking to strangers and such but it taught us really to laugh. This tape is hilarious! FOR PRIVATE PAAAAAAAAARTS!!!!

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3 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

This video is a great learning tool for children of all ages... even 43 year old children.

10/10
Author: otheralias from e.g. London, England
10 April 2004

This life-changing documentary about the hard truth of child safety came out before I was born but it's messages continue to teach me and everyone who I have shown it to incredible skills. "How to do a self-defense yell for danger, "the honk"" has been especially helpful. The literature on the back of the VHS case describes this films message best when it states: "It's like teaching [children] to look both ways before crossing the street... only it's a whole lot trickier."

They were so right, but not as right as anyone who says "Hey! We should watch "Strong Kids, Safe Kids" tonight!"

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