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Rolling Kansas (2003) Poster

Quotes

Kevin Haub: You girls are pretty.

[pause]

Kevin Haub: I'm gay though...

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Dave Murphy: Aw man, that garbage can was full of loaded diapers.

Kevin Haub: Baby's are cute, though.

Dave Murphy: [pause] Yeah they are.

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Satin: What about you? What's your story?

Kevin Haub: I'm gay.

Satin: [uncomfortable silence] You think you're gay?

Kevin Haub: I think I'm gay. I think I like dudes. This old farmer guy asked me if I liked boys. You know it got me to thinking.

Blush: Anyone else in the car think they're gay?

Dinkadoo MurphyHunter BulletteDave MurphyDick Murphy: No.

Dinkadoo Murphy: Kevin, wh-what do you mean you think you're gay?

Kevin Haub: I do. I think I like dudes.

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Dinkadoo Murphy: That goat doesn't look right...

Dick Murphy: I hate goats. They're weird.

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Kevin Haub: Hey with all them boxes. I'm going to make 'em into a giant break dancing mat and we're going to have a neighborhood break off.

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Dinkadoo Murphy: [shouts] Tyrone, shut your fat ass up, and sit your fat ass down.

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Kevin Haub: Out of all of us, Hunter would be the safest in prison.

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Farmer: Reckon you need a good ass-whoopin?

Kevin Haub: Nah, I don't think so...

Farmer: You're soft, like a knobbly-kneed girl. Reckon you like boys?

Kevin Haub: Nah, I don't think so... I just looking for some cutting implements.

Farmer: Saws and what have you?

Kevin Haub: Yes sir.

Farmer: I've got cutting implements. Saws and what have you...

Kevin Haub: Cool,. Are they in good condition? Well oiled? Little or no rust?

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Dinkadoo Murphy: You clumsy Silverback, watch my FUCKIN' legs.

Dave Murphy: Nice one, foghorn. Why don't you just hurl your feces at the patrons?

Dick Murphy: Really Dink, you can't just holler out vulgarities like that, we are in the middle of the gosh darn Bible-belt here.

Dinkadoo Murphy: Whatever Dick, no one even noticed.

Dot the Waitress: We all hate you. Also, some enraged farmer has stolen your wheelchair.

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Kevin Haub: Weedworm. How cool.

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Agent Madsen, Trooper: We're gonna cut the head off the Dope Snake. And watch it writhe around - in its own feces, blood and mucus, dragging its entrails, making concentric circles in the sand - before it expires.

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Dick Murphy: Hey, I'm sorry about that garbage can. This car's weird.

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Honey: So, what are you guys doing in Kansas?

Dave Murphy: World's

[pause]

Dave Murphy: largest corn silo.

Honey: Really? It's here in Kansas?

Dave Murphy: Oh yeah. We're gonna bungie that big fucker.

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Angry Motorcycle Cop: You say you're not poaching endangered water fowl. But Jesus Christ, look at all these dead ducks! Also, your vehicle is horrible. I see this car on the road again, I'll cite ya.

Dick Murphy: [stutters] I-We-we-ah. The ducks hit *us*!

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Dinkadoo Murphy: [startled] Our weed is packed with trunk!

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Dick Murphy: Look, it's an old guy, in a tree.

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Agent Madsen, Trooper: [to Hunter] Hey, big man!

Kevin Haub: Yes sir.

Agent Madsen, Trooper: Not you, thin-bin!

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Kevin Haub: I have a Russian sword... it's large.

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Agent Brinkley: Orange Crush. Half Ice.

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Dick Murphy: Now here's what we're gonna do, we're gonna put that human nose back in the glovebox. Go on. We're gonna forget about it. Forever.

Kevin Haub: Yeah, okay that sounds easy enough. Hey, anyone hungry?

Dinkadoo Murphy: Yes, good idea.

Kevin Haub: What about the human nose?

Dick Murphy: Kevin, forget about the human nose!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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