Get Well Soon (2001)
Bobby: All of my life, I wanted to do this. Be on this show, in front of this audience, with my theme song. And I thought... once I got here... that I'd be able to start living. But this... this is not living.
Lily: The least you can do, if you're going to leave me... is leave me.
Bobby: Lily, don't disappear.
Lily: Why, why, because you're the only one who can disappear? You're in my fucking living room five nights a week, don't talk to me about disappearing!
Bobby: Four nights. We repeated on Monday.
Lily: No, No, I know that because I even watch that. That's how fucking pathetic I am.
Bobby: The show's good.
Lily: The least you can do, if you're gonna leave me... is leave me. You have to become a part of pop culture, in my fucking living room five nights a week!
Bobby: Oh, oh, excuse me! Excuse me for being successful! That's what I did!
Mitchell: Tonight's a big night, you know, going live, without a net... just like Johnny!
Bobby: Johnny got to tape them at four.
Mitchell: Fuck 'em, fuck 'em, he's a dinosaur.
Bobby: My name is Kevin, Mitch. Did you know that?
Mitchell: No. That's great. Thank you for sharing.
Angry: [talking about Sex and the City] Beautiful people always hump each other.
Keith: Exactly, I'm not putting it on!
Angry: Never ugly/beautiful. Always beautiful/beautiful.
Lily: Hey, did you see it?
Cindy: I'm speechless!
Lily: It's actually kinda sad.
Cindy: Kinda sad? It's tragic! What they're doing to these poor animals...
Lily: What are you watching?
Cindy: Discovery. What are you watching?
Lily: Bobby Bishop.
Mark: [to Lily] Rosie O'Donnell's gonna crucify him! What an idiot!
Bobby: [Later, to Mitch] All I know is, Rosie O'Donnell's gonna crucify me.
Keith: How's Dick?
Lily: Mark is fine. He says hi.
Lily: Mom, come on, you're not homeless!
Linda: I could be!
Lily: Yeah, we all COULD be, but you're NOT!
Cindy: [talking about Linda] But she doesn't even smoke!
Lily: That's what I'm saying! She just started today! See how weird?
Cindy: He won't come in here, this is the ladies' room!
Lily: But he told a model on my television that he wanted to fuck her, you don't think he's gonna come into the ladies' room?
Mark: [ordering lunch] Okay, well I'm trying to eat Vegetarian. So, um... I'll have the meatloaf.
Bobby: [talking to Cindy] I bet you she's still amazing, like before. I'd really like to be amazed again.
Lily: [overhearing what Bobby said] FUCK YOU!
Louis: If days of the week had a color, what would Tuesday be?
Nathan: Sky blue!
Angry: Navy. No, uh, dark brown.
Louis: Like a chocolate!
Bobby: [getting out of jail, being interviewed on the news] Love got me busted, and her name is Lily. Hey Lily!
Lily: What the fuck am I doing? What am I doing? God, I swear so much these days.
Bobby: When did you get this new vocabulary?
Lily: When did I get it?
Bobby: Yeah, when did you get it?
Lily: My new attitude? What, what the fuck?
Bobby: You never said things like that, ever.
Lily: I didn't have the opportunity to say it to you, because you left! Do you have any idea what it's like? Do you know what it's like to be in a relationship to live, live with someone, and not be able to tell them that, that guy on channel 7 is your boyfriend? That is your ex-boyfriend? Do you know what that's like? I'm like a fucking spectacle, I'm an idiot, I'm a, I'm a loser!
Bobby: You're not a loser. What're you, what're you...
Lily: Come ON! I did everything for you! I helped you... and loved you!
Bobby: I loved you too!
Lily: I thought you were funny!
Bobby: I AM funny!
Lily: I rearranged my living room furniture so that we could play talk show!