Dolemite is a pimp who was set up by Willie Greene and the cops, who have planted drugs, stolen furs, and guns in his trunk and got him sentenced to 20 years in jail. One day, Queen B and a... See full summary »
Rudy Ray Moore,
The Ji Ho Ninja clan vow to destroy the monks of a Shaolin temple. To do so they must first perfect their Water Spider Assault Unit, the Iron Tiger Claw, the Ninja Rock Climbing Formation ... See full summary »
A retired cop becomes a DJ/celebrity at the Blueberry Hill disco-- he's the "Disco Godfather!" All is well until his nephew flips out on a strange new drug that's sweeping the streets, ... See full summary »
Sewage workers Jack and Charlie get involved in an international Asian gang war when Jack helps the boss of a Shanghai gang against one of his rebellious underlings. This underling then ... See full summary »
In Japanese-occupied China, a group of ruthless ninjas schemes to take control of a Shaolin temple - and all of its riches - by any means necessary. The peaceful Shaolin monks are reluctant... See full summary »
Alexander Rei Lo,
Alan Chung San Chui
Great lost footage from "Ninja: The Final Duel" here!
Okay, first of all, I'd like to send a warning to every Dolemite-fan out there: DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! Rudy Ray Moore is only in the movie for a total of maximum 5-10 minutes, and only delivers dialogue like "Shiiiit", "Mothafuckaaa" and stuff like that, very uncreative by his part. Sam the Spliff (Jimmy Lynch) also appears in new footage and briefly fights two Asian Ninjas, who are totally unrelated to the rest of the movie.
Also on the DVD is a short (and very poorly filmed/written/delivered) introduction by Rudy, which is mind-numbingly awful and should not be seen by anyone either. I can't believe how low Moore has sunk to milk more money out of his loyal fans, it's really quite sad.
But, now on the good part: Somehow, Moore has found the original lost footage from "Ninja: The Final Duel", which was not released on the DVD-version of that movie (There was allegedly more than 10 hours of footage for a mini-series about Ninjas). He has added his own silly dubbing, which tries to modernize the story and move it forward to some sort of conclusion at the end, although his own footage makes no sense, which his ugly mug popping up every 10 minutes and saying "Wow, there's Ninjas!" and stuff like that.
Apart from the spliced-in footage of himself (actually dubbed worse than the old movie), the movie is quite entertaining, with many creative fights and mysterious objects flying around, like two bells fighting it out, breaking the sound-barriers and what the human mind can take (The original scene went on for more than 5 minutes with Eugene Thomas and a female Ninja ringing their bells constantly.. a good way to lose your mind if you turn up the volume to the max!)
The movie features Eugene Thomas as the bad guy with a gold-paper crescent moon on his forehead, and Alexander Lou as the hero who is trying to stop his evil ways, along with his helpers, two orange-clad hare Krishna-monks played by the martial arts legends Toby Russell and John Ladalski, and the gay Davey Crockett wielding a sword, played by the hilarious Silvio Azzolini, who along with Thomas and Lou also played a major part in the Ninja-classic "Mafia Vs. Ninja", which also was directed by the legendary Robert Tai, who plays "Abbott White" here, who does some really amazing fighting.
Things to look for: Ninja's flying out of the ground, digging underground tunnels faster than moles; a topless female Ninja who uses her "talents" to embarrass her opponents; blankets flying around almost living their own lives; guys spitting out so much blood that you shouldn't think their stomachs's were healthy; and a golden and a silver super-fighter who cannot be beaten by anything other than small beads!
So, all in all, I give the "Ninja: Final Duel"-footage 9/10 points, and the new footage of Moore and the atrocious new dubbing 1/10, for a total of 5/10 stars.
P.S: On the DVD (I got it along with "The Black Samurai" on a double-pack) there is fortunately a lot of extra scenes from the original movie, with the original Asian dubbing! These should not be missed!
2 of 3 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?