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Mean Machine (2001)

 -  Comedy | Drama | Sport  -  26 December 2001 (UK)
6.5
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Ratings: 6.5/10 from 26,164 users   Metascore: 45/100
Reviews: 82 user | 56 critic | 25 from Metacritic.com

A soccer star jailed for assault leads a group of inmates in a match against prison guards.

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Writers:

(earlier screenplay "The Longest Yard"), (screenplay), 2 more credits »
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Title: Mean Machine (2001)

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
...
Doc
...
Governor
...
Burton
...
Massive
...
Trojan
...
Ratchett
John Forgeham ...
Charlie Sykes
...
Tracey
...
Billy the Limpet
...
Bob Likely
...
Martin Wimbush ...
Z
David Reid ...
Barman
David Cropman ...
Second Barman
Edit

Storyline

Disgraced ex-England captain (Danny 'Mean Machine' Meehan) is thrown in jail for assaulting two police officers. Whilst in jail, he doesn't recieve any favours because of his celebrity status in the outside world. He is out numbered and many prisoners constantly barrage him with insults for letting down his country in a crucial World Cup game. He keeps his head down and has the opportunity to forget everything and change the lives of the prisoners. These prisoners have the chance to put one over the evil guards. The prisoners are lead by Danny and the whole of the prison, guards aside, are behind them. Game on...... Written by James Phillips

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

Not Your Usual Suspects See more »

Genres:

Comedy | Drama | Sport

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for language and some violence | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

Country:

|

Language:

Release Date:

26 December 2001 (UK)  »

Also Known As:

A Máquina  »

Box Office

Budget:

£2,500,000 (estimated)

Opening Weekend:

$16,870 (USA) (22 February 2002)

Gross:

$92,191 (USA) (3 May 2002)
 »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See  »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

At the end of the movie the match commentators give the following speech: "Guards of Pentonville, guards of Wandsworth, Walton nick in Liverpool, policemen of Britain, traffic wardens and parole officers, wheel clampers, your boys have taken a hell of a beating today! A hell of a beating!" This speech is a direct reference to Norwegian sports commentator Bjørge Lillelien who made British headlines, when in 1981, Norway beat England during the 1982 World Cup qualifiers and he gave the following emotional response: "[In Norwegian] We are the best in the world! We are the best in the world! We have beaten England 2-1 at football! It is totally incredible! We have beaten England! England, home of giants: Looooord Nelson, Looooord Beaverbrook, Sir Winston Churchill, Anthony Eden, Clement Attlee, Henry Cooper, Lady Diana. We have beaten them all, we have beaten them all! [In English] Maggie Thatcher, can you hear me? [In Norwegian] Maggie Thatcher, I have a message to you during the election: We have beaten England out of the World Championship in football! Maggie Thatcher, as they say in your language in the boxing-bars around Madison Square Garden: [in English] Your boys took a hell of a beating! Your boys took a hell of a beating!" However, despite the loss, England continued on to qualify for the World Cup finals, while Norway did not. See more »

Goofs

Flipped shot: In the opening scenes, when Danny is being chased by the police, his driving position changes from right-hand drive to left-hand drive, then back again between shots. See more »

Quotes

Danny Meehan: Oh right lads, you wanna be nothing, prisoners... numbers... that's fine. But you win out there today and you'll have something to remember forever, talk about it over and over, because up and down the country there are cons that are pig sick of not being here in your shoes... just to have one crack at those bastards next door!
Danny Meehan: Run your guts out, and you'll have somethin' in 'ere
[points towards heart]
Danny Meehan: they can never touch, guards and nutcase governors... NOW... ask yourselves one question... ...
[...]
See more »

Connections

References Victory (1981) See more »

Soundtracks

Ooh La La
Written by Tom Anthony, Theo Keating, Lalo Schifrin
Performed by The Wiseguys
See more »

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User Reviews

It's British and there's no Hugh Grant in sight
2 December 2003 | by (Stockton, UK) – See all my reviews

As a huge fan of Longest Yard, I was very nervous about this film, rest assured, this is great, especially when watched with all yer mates and the lager is freely flowing. Vinnie Jones is a former england footie player now disgraced and stuck in prison for assault, if you've seen the Longest Yard you know what comes next.

Highlights include David Hemming's eyebrows, Jason Statham's insane Monk character, Bob & Bob the commentators, the over-done Ravinelli references (I'm a Boro fan), and Ralph Brown's guard who is actually a nice fella at the end, and a score of supporting actors who pop up during the film, but whose names I can't remember.

This film is not a classic, or a masterpiece, it's what almost every film should be: fun

Mean Machine (2001) well worth checking out


19 of 22 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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rip off of longest hard and the great escape bhall4472
football vs yank handball medwaymodernist
the main dance tune,,,,,,plzzzzzzz hero3279
ryan giggs a prison guard? Found_Nezha
Bob vs. Bob Zaljubljena
another song rickardw
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