When a young man agrees to housesit for his boss, he thinks it'll be the perfect opportunity to get close to the woman he desperately has a crush on - his boss's daughter. But he doesn't ...
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On a flight from Los Angeles to New York, Oliver and Emily make a connection, only to decide that they are poorly suited to be together. Over the next seven years, however, they are ... See full summary »
A vacationing woman meets her ideal man, leading to a swift marriage. Back at home, however, their idyllic life is upset when they discover their neighbors could be assassins who have been contracted to kill the couple.
When a young man agrees to housesit for his boss, he thinks it'll be the perfect opportunity to get close to the woman he desperately has a crush on - his boss's daughter. But he doesn't plan on the long line of other houseguests that try to keep him from his mission. And he also has to deal with the daughter's older brother, who's on the run from local drug dealers. Written by
The 16 March 2001 draft of the screenplay lists David Zucker and Peter Tilden as writers. Tilden is not credited in the final film and Zucker only receives a directing credit. See more »
On the subway, Tom gets shot with a water gun by a little boy that appears from nowhere. The boy sits down then disappears. See more »
What's this I hear about you threatening to spray this play with an AK-47?
Oh... well, I was just making a joke.
Oh that's funny to you? People dying? And what's this I hear about you making fun of midgets?
I never make fun of midgets!
You said, it would be fun to date one because then you could rest your beer on their head, now I have a sense of humour, but that's just sick.
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After the credits end a voiceover says "I told 'em they'd see the ass, sooner or later" See more »
How Long Has It Been
Written by Greg Harmelink, Daniel Geller, Ryan Lewis, Patrick Valentine and Sean Rawls
Performed by Kincaid
Courtesy of Kindercore Records
By Arrangement with Big Sounds International See more »
Tom Stansfield (Ashton Kutcher) is a researcher at a publishing house in Chicago but he wants to be creative. He has a crush on Lisa Taylor (Tara Reid) who is the daughter of his domineering boss Jack Taylor (Terence Stamp). Jack fires his secretary Audrey Bennett (Molly Shannon) blaming it on Tom. Lisa is housesitting for her dad but she wants to go to a party. Lisa asks Tom to housesit so that she can attend her party. Tom assumes that it's a date. Jack has crazy requirements for his owl. Then the irresponsible brother Red (Andy Richter) returns hiding from drug dealer T.J. (Michael Madsen). Audrey comes by to ask for her job back but she brings her annoying boyfriend Spike (Tyler Labine). Spike drives off and Tom reluctantly lets Audrey stay. Lisa's boyfriend Hans cheated on her and she comes home early.
Everybody is annoying in this movie and Ashton Kutcher is the welcome mat for them to walk all over on. The screwball slapstick is annoying. Everything and everyone annoyed me in this movie. This is a David Zucker film but it needs to get the characters right before the slapstick comedy could actually work.
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