Ice Age (2002)
Sid: For a second there, I actually thought you were gonna eat me.
Diego: I don't eat junk food.
Diego: "Us"? You two are a bit of an odd couple.
Manfred: There is no "us"!
Diego: I see. Couldn't have one of your own, so you decided to adopt.
Diego: [playing peek-a-boo] Where's the baby?... There he is!
[the baby's only reaction is blinking; it is so startled it's quieted]
Diego: Where's the baby?... there he is!
Manny: [the baby begins crying again] Stop it, you're scaring him!
Manfred: Okay, you. Check for poop.
Sid: Hey, why am I the poop-checker?
Manfred: Because returning the runt was your idea, because you're small and insignificant, and because I'll pummel you if you don't.
Sid: ...Why else?
Manfred: NOW, Sid!
Diego: The baby? Please. I was just returning it to its herd.
Sid: Oh, yeah. Nice try, Bucktooth.
Diego: You calling me a liar?
Sid: I didn't say that.
Diego: You were thinking it.
Sid: [whispering, to Manny] I don't like this cat. He reads minds.
Manfred: [watching the dodos] Hey, look at that. Dinner and a show.
Manfred: Diego, spit that out. You don't know where it's been.
Dodo: This is our private stockpile for the Ice Age. Sub arctic temperatures will force us underground for a billion, billion years.
Manfred: So you got three melons?
Diego: I've eaten things that didn't complain this much.
Manfred: If you find a mate in life, you should be loyal. In your case, grateful.
Manfred: Here's your little bundle of joy. We're returning it to the humans.
Sid: Awww, the big bad tigey-wigey gets left behind. Poor Tigey-Wigey.
Manfred: Sid, Tigey-Wigey's gonna lead the way.
Sid: Uh, Manny, can I-can I-can I talk to you for a second?
Manfred: [passing] No. The sooner we get to Glacier Pass, the sooner I get rid of Mr. Stinky Droolface. And the baby, too.
Diego: You won't always have Jumbo around to protect you. And when that day comes, I suggest you watch your back... 'cause I'll be chewing on it.
Manfred: Hey, über-tracker. Up front where I can see you.
Sid: ...Help me.
Diego: Why did you do that? You could've died trying to save me.
Manfred: That's what you do in a herd: you look out for each other.
Diego: Well... thanks.
Diego: I'm... sorry I set you guys up.
Sid: Ah, you know me, I'm too lazy to hold a grudge.
Sid: My feet are sweating.
Diego: Do we need a news flash every time your body does something?
Manfred: He's doing it for attention, just ignore him.
[Sid's trying to use the baby to get attention from girls]
Sid: I'm begging you. I need him.
Manny: What, a good-looking guy like you?
Sid: Aw, you say that, but you don't mean it.
Manny: No, seriously, look at you. Aw, those ladies, they don't stand a chance.
Sid: You have a very cruel sense of humor.
Glyptodont: So, where's Eddie?
Glyptodont: Oh, he said something about being on the verge of an evolutionary breakthrough.
[Eddie is seen running off a cliff in the background]
Eddie: Look, I'm flying!
Glyptodont: Some breakthrough.
Sid: Can I hang out with you?
Manfred: Sure. Climb on my back and relax the whole way.
Sid: So she picks this hair off my shoulder, and says, "If you're gonna have a second mating dance, at least pick a sloth with the same color pelt." And I'm thinkin', "Whoa! She's gonna go praying-mantis on me." Know what I'm saying?
Manny: Hey, if you find a mate in life, you should be loyal. In your case, grateful. Now get away from me.
Diego: Whoo, yeah! Who's up for round two?
Diego: Um, t-t-tell the kid to be more careful.
Sid: [catching up to Manfred and Diego, he sits down on the top of a geyser] Hey, thanks for waiting.
[the geyser erupts, and sends Sid shooting up into the sky]
Manfred: Sure is faithful.
[Sid lands with his head in the geyser]
Sid: Hey, what's your problem?
Manny: *You* are my problem.
Sid: Well, I think you're stressed, and that's why you eat so much. I mean, it's hard to get fat on a vegan diet.
Manny: I'm not fat. It's all this fur. It makes me look... poofy.
Sid: Fine. You have fat hair. But when you're ready to talk, I'm here.
Diego: Is its nose dry?
Sid: That means there's something wrong with it.
Diego: Someone should lick it, just in case.
Manfred: Hey, he's wearing one of those baby-thingies.
Manfred: So, if he poops, where does it go?
Sid: ...Humans are disgusting.
Sid: I don't know about you guys but, we are the weirdest herd I've ever seen.
Sid: From now on, you'll have to refer to me as "Sid, Lord of the Flame."
Manfred: Hey, Lord of the Flame, your tail's on fire.
Sid: [after Diego snuffs out the fire on his tail] Thank you. From now on, I'm gonna call you "Diego..."
Diego: Lord of Touch Me and You're Dead.
Manfred: [to Sid] Let's get something straight, okay? There's no "we". There never *was* a "we". In fact, without "me", there wouldn't even be a "you"!
[on Sid's clumsy attempts to scale a cliff]
Manfred: You're an embarrassment to nature. Ya know that?
Sid: [about the baby] I bet he's hungry.
Manny: How 'bout some milk?
Sid: Ooh, I'd love some!
Diego: Not you. The baby.
Sid: Well, I ain't exactly lactating right now, pal.
Diego: You're a little low on the food chain to be mouthing off, aren't you...
Manny: [in a shout that echoes] ENOUGH!
Sid: You know? This whole ice age thing is getting old. You know what I could go for? A global warming.
Diego: Keep dreaming.
Sid: No really...
Diego: Save your breath, Sid. You know humans can't talk.
[passing a Stonehenge-like structure]
Manfred: Modern architecture. It'll never last.
Dodo: If you weren't smart enough to plan ahead, then doom on you.
Other Dodos: [chanting] Doom on you. Doom on you. Doom on you. Doom on...
Manfred: Get away from me.
Manfred: Sid, the tiger found a shortcut.
[Sid looks up at the mountain they will have to climb]
Sid: No thanks, I choose life.
Diego: [glaring at him where he stands so Sid almost runs into him when turning] Then I suggest you take the shortcut.
Sid: Are you threatening me?
Diego: [in a shout that echoes] *MOVE*, SLOTH!
Dodo: Prepare for the Ice Age.
Sid: Ice Age?
Diego: I've heard of these crackpots.
Carl: [to Sid] Look, we're gonna break your neck so you don't feel a thing. How's that?
Manfred: Wait a minute. I thought rhinos were vegetarians.
Sid: An excellent point!
Manfred: Shut up.
Carl: Who says we're gonna eat him after we kill them?
Frank: Yeah, come on, move it.
Manfred: You know, I don't like animals that kill for pleasure.
Carl: Save it for a mammal that cares.
Sid: I'm a mammal that cares!
Manfred: Hey, buddy, want a lift?
Diego: No, thanks. I'm saving what little dignity I've got left.
Sid: You're hanging out with us now, pal. Dignity has nothing to do with it.
Start: Hey! Do the world a favor. Move your issues off the road!
Manfred: If my trunk was that small, I wouldn't call attention to myself, pal.
Diego: Maybe we shouldn't do this.
Sid: Why not?
Diego: ...Because if we save him he'll grow up to be a hunter. And who do you think he'll hunt?
Sid: Maybe because we saved him, he won't hunt us.
Diego: Yeah, and maybe he'll grow fur, and a long, skinny neck and call you Mama.
Manfred: Look at you. You're gonna grow up to be a great predator. I don't think so. What do you have, just a little patch of fur. No claws... no fangs... You're little folds of skin wrapped in... mush. What's so threatening about you?
[Manfred just grabbed the baby]
Diego: Um, that pink thing is mine.
Diego: Hello, ladies.
Oscar: Hey, look who finally decided to show up.
Soto: Diego. I was beginning to worry about you.
Diego: No need to worry. In about two minutes you'll be satisfying your taste for revenge.
Soto: Very nice.
Soto: What are you doing?
Diego: Leave the mammoth alone.
Soto: Fine. I'll take you down first.
[Sid and the baby are fighting]
Manfred: Don't make me reach back there.
Sid: He started it.
Manfred: I don't care who started it. I'll finish it.
Carl: I can't believe it. Fresh wild greens? Frank. Where did you ever?
Frank: Go ahead - dig in...
Carl: A dandelion! I thought the frost wiped 'em all out.
Frank: [singsong voice] All but one.
Freaky Mammal: Well, why don't they call it The Big Chill? Or The Nippy Era? I'm just sayin', how do we know it's an Ice Age?
Freaky Mammal: Because, of all...
Freaky Mammal: the *ice*!
Freaky Mammal: Well, things just got a little chillier.
Sid: [showing the baby cave paintings] Look, the tigers are just playing tag with the antelope...
Sid: With their teeth.
Diego: Come on Sid, let's play tag. You're it.
Manfred: Yeah, well, I'm still trying to get rid of the last thing I saved.
Rachel: He's not much to look at, but it's so hard to find a family man these days.
Jennifer: Tell me about it. All of the sensitive ones get eaten.
[the tigers find out the "baby" is a snow decoy]
Sid: Sorry, fellas. He got a little frostbite.
Sid: [holding on to Manfred's leg] Don't let them impale me. I wanna live!
Manfred: Get off me!
Diego: You don't know much about tracking, do you?
Sid: Hey, I'm a sloth. I see a tree, eat a leaf, that's my tracking.
[to an animal whose dung he has stepped in]
Sid: Hey, widebody, curb it next time!
[Sid is drawing a sloth with chalk]
Diego: What are you doing?
Sid: I'm putting sloths on the map.
Manfred: Why don't you make him more realistic and draw him lying down?
Diego: And make him rounder.
[Manfred draws a pot-belly on Sid's drawing]
Sid: Ha, ha. I forgot how to laugh.
Manfred: Oh, isn't there someone else you can annoy? Friends? Family? Poisonous reptiles?
Diego: You want to maul something, don't you, Zeke?
Zeke: [whining anxiously] I wanna maul.
Diego: Then what are you waiting for?
[Diego makes a huge jump]
Sid: I wish I could jump like that.
Manfred: [kicking Sid] Wish granted.
Diego: At the bottom of Half Peak... there's an ambush, waiting for you.
Manfred: What do you mean ambush?
Manfred: You set us up.
Diego: It was my job. I was supposed to get the baby, but then...
Manfred: You brought us home - for dinner!
Sid: That's it. You're out of the herd!
Sid: Well, I think mating for life is stupid. I mean, there's plenty of Sid to go around.
Dodo: [rallying other dodoes] Prepare for the Ice Age.
Dodo: Protect the dodo way of life.
Dodo: Survival separates the dodos from the beasts.
Zeke: Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo. I can't wait to get my paws on that mammoth.
Soto: Nobody touches the mammoth until I get the baby.
Zeke: ...First I'm gonna slice its hindquarters in sections. I'll put the white meat in one pile, and the dark meat in another.
Lenny: Hey, knock it off. I'm starving.
Zeke: Next, the shoulders. Occasionally tough, but extremely juicy.
Lenny: I told you to knock it off!
Sid: Isn't this great? Two bachelors knocking about in the wild?
Manfred: No. You just want a bodyguard so you don't become somebody's side-dish.
Sid: You're a very shrewd mammal. Okay, you lead the way, Mr. Big, uh... I didn't catch the name...
Sid: Manfred? Yuck, man, how about Manny the Moody Mammoth? Manny the melancholy? Manny the... yipe!
Manfred: [after turning abruptly so he scrambled up a sapling] Stop, following me.
Soto: Just you look at the cute little baby, Diego. Isn't it nice that he'll be joining us for breakfast?
Diego: It wouldn't be breakfast without him.
Soto: Especially after his daddy wiped out half our pack. And wears our skin to keep warm. An eye for an eye, don't you think?
Diego: We'll teach that human what happens when he messes with sabers.
Soto: Alert the troops. We attack at dawn. And Diego: bring me the baby, alive. If I'm going to enjoy my revenge, I want it to be fresh.
Sid: [Dragging a stick] Phew. I'm wiped out.
Manfred: That's your shelter?
Sid: Hey, you're a big guy, you got a lot of wood. I'm a little guy.
Manfred: You got half a stick.
Sid: Yes, but with this little stick and my highly-evolved brain...
[accidentally pokes himself in the eye with stick]
Sid: Ow... I shall create -
[snaps it in half]
Sid: We'll see if brains triumph over brawn tonight, now won't we?
[Later, Sid is trying to light a fire in the rain, while Manfred is dry under his shelter]
Manfred: Hey, I think I saw a spark.
Manfred: Don't you have some poor, defenseless animal to disembowel?
Manfred: Okay, listen, if either of you two can make it across that sinkhole in front of you, the sloth is yours.
Sid: That's right, you losers! You take one step and you're dead.
[Sid throws a rock, which bounces across the "sinkhole" without leaving so much as a crack]
Sid: You were bluffing, huh?
Manfred: Yeah. Yeah, that was a bluff.
[Rumbling is heard]
Manfred: [to Diego] Tell me that was your stomach.
Sid: I'm sure it's just thunder. From, under... ground?
Dodo: [lecturing about a crater] Now don't fall in. If you do, you will definitely...
Dodo: [runs in] Intruders. Intruders... oops.
[trips and falls into crater]
Dodo: ...Burn and die.
Diego: [examining the ground] You didn't miss them by much. It's still green, they headed north two hours ago.
Sid: [mimicking with sticks in his mouth] It's still green, they headed north two hours ago.
Sid: Hey, you rhinos, you have really small brains. Did you know that? It's just a fact, no offense. I mean, you probably don't even know what I'm talking about.
Manfred: [to Scrat] Hey, buddy. Have you seen any humans go by here?
[Scrats mimes charade game]
Sid: Ooh, ooh, ooh! I love this game, I love this game! Let's see. First word...
[Scrat mimes packing down snow]
Sid: Stomp. No, Stamp.
Manfred: Let me try. Um... pack.
Sid: Good one, Manny.
[Scrat acts like a sabertooth]
Sid: Second word, long teeth... and claws. Pack of wolves? Pack of...
Manfred: Pack of bears?
Manfred: Pack of fleas?
Sid: [Scrat points at Diego] Pack of whiskers? Pack of noses?
Sid: Pack of lies? Pack of troubles?
[Diego swats Scrat and sends him flying]
Sid: Pack a wallop? Pack of birds! Pack of flying fish!
Sid: This is gonna be the best migration ever! I'm gonna show you all my favorite watering holes. And I turn brown when the fungus in my fur dries out!
Manfred: It sounds very attractive.
Manfred: [to the baby] Hey, hey, does this look like a petting zoo to you?
Sid: My family abandoned me. They kinda migrated without me. You should've seen what they did last year. I mean, they got up early, and quietly tied up my hands and feet, and gagged me with a field mouse, and barricaded the cave door, and covered their tracks, and traveled through water so I'd lose their scent, and... and... who needs 'em anyway?