Home Room (2002)

Busy Philipps: Alicia Browning

Photos 

17 more photos

Quotes 

• Alicia Browning : WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? You think you can come in here and you can spend ten minutes and come out with all the FUCKING ANSWERS? Hey, I've got one: kids pick up guns and THEY KILL OTHER KIDS. That's it! And if that answer isn't good enough, then maybe you should see a doctor or a priest and you can ask THEM why. And they'll feed you all the psycho babble you can stand or they'll tell you that God has some "greater plan" for everyone. And when you keep pressing and those answers aren't good enough, all they'll have left to tell you is the unholy truth, that KIDS JUST DIE.

  [long pause] 

  Alicia Browning : And babies

  [like mine] 

  Alicia Browning : die too.

• Alicia Browning : Who sent these?

  Deanna Cartwright : huh?

  Alicia Browning : These flowers, there's no card. Who sent them?

  Deanna Cartwright : Bobby Launer.

  Alicia Browning : He's an idiot. Look at this. Three gladiolus, five carnations, and a bunch of white roses?

  Deanna Cartwright : I think they're pretty.

  Alicia Browning : It's funeral standard. Your boy's got a green thumb up his ass. Either that, or he's got a great sense of humor. Do you know why the carnation became the funeral flower? Because they smell super sweet. They're overpowering, right? So back in the old days, before they'd figured out how to preserve dead bodies, they just had to use lots of carnations at funerals to hide the rotting smell.

  Deanna Cartwright : That... really doesn't help me... at all.

  [taking one of her pills] 

  Alicia Browning : Neither do those.

• Deanna Cartwright : You're are not coming back, are you? I'm not gonna see you again, am I?

  Alicia Browning : I'll be around

  Deanna Cartwright : Alicia... are you real?

  Alicia Browning : [Smirks and stares at Deanna] 

  Deanna Cartwright : I mean, this whole thing, it really happened?

  Alicia Browning : [Staring at Deanna]  Good night, Deanna

• Alicia Browning : People who think that morning is the best part of the day are the same kinds of people that think crust is the best part of the pizza.

• Alicia Browning : Is Bobby your boyfriend?

  Deanna Cartwright : [shakes her head no] 

  Alicia Browning : Well, you better strike now while the iron's hot. I mean, you're very, very pathetic right now. There isn't a guy in the world who'd say no to you. Try to make the most out of this little near-death experience. Which, by the looks of it, you're handling just fine anyways.

  Deanna Cartwright : I guess. You know, "when life gives you lemons..."

  Alicia Browning : What did you just say?

  Deanna Cartwright : "When Life give you lemons... make lemonade."

  Alicia Browning : That is the biggest load of crap I've ever heard. What? "Time heals all wounds." "Everything happens for a reason." and "I guess they're all in a better place now," too? So, why do they still have you here? Are you cracking up or something?

  Deanna Cartwright : That's a very rude way to put it.

  Alicia Browning : Well, I can't help it. I'm fascinated by nuttiness and its causes.

  Deanna Cartwright : I had a few nightmares, which really excited them. They even have a clinical term for it, "Repressed Memory Anxiety," which I think sounds a tad bit overdramatic. But now they spend every morning trying to tap my subconscious fears. Fears so scary I don't even know I have them. It's a complete waste. I usually end up missing "The Crocodile Hunter."

• Deanna Cartwright : There's nothing wrong with being a virgin!

  Alicia Browning : Of course not. It's hip to be a virgin nowadays.

  Deanna Cartwright : It's never hip to be a virgin. It's really hard.

  Alicia Browning : I'm sure it is. Oh, there's a song about it.

  Deanna Cartwright : A song?

  Alicia Browning : Yeah. I think it's Bananarama? No, no, no, it's the Go-Gos! "Our Lips are sealed."

  Deanna Cartwright : What?

  Alicia Browning : "Our Lips are sealed."

  [while rolling the eyes down and then looking back up] 

  Alicia Browning : It's about a bunch of chicks trying to stay virgins.

  Deanna Cartwright : Okay, first of all, that's gross. Second of all, you're wrong. It's about a bunch of girls trying to keep a secret.

  Alicia Browning : If I wasn't getting any, I'd want to keep it a secret too.

• Deanna Cartwright : Here's a BOP magazine. Do you like the Backstreet Boys? yeah, me neither. You're probably into that Tori Amos, Fiona Apple, whiny rock. But Kevin and Brian are hot.

  Alicia Browning : Who the hell are you talking about?

  Deanna Cartwright : [shaking her head]  Forget it.

  Alicia Browning : Are those the guys you think about when you masturbate?

  Deanna Cartwright : I don't think we should be...

  Alicia Browning : Don't say that you don't.

  Deanna Cartwright : I'm not saying that I don't, I'm just saying that I don't think I should be discussing that with... God, you say stuff like that just to set me off. Why do you do that?

  Alicia Browning : Because you make it so easy for me.

  Alicia Browning : it hurts.

  Deanna Cartwright : What does?

  Alicia Browning : The first time you do it. It hurts. It's what every virgin wants to know, right? It hurts. It burns sort of.

  Deanna Cartwright : I know... How... How much?

  Alicia Browning : I don't know. I think it's different for everyone. It probably doesn't hurt as bad as, oh, I don't know, say, getting shot in the head.

• Det. Macready : [about the kids who bring guns to school]  It's never the bullies, is it?

  Alicia Browning : Of course not. Bullies have to graduate, so that they can become police officers.

• Deanna Cartwright : [about Alicia's mocking comments toward the police]  They're the police!

  Alicia Browning : Yeah, we go way back.

• Alicia Browning : What did you put in this?

  Deanna Cartwright : Potassium chlorate. It'd kill you before you hit the ground.

  Alicia Browning : So it's faster than smoking.

  Deanna Cartwright : You made a joke.

  Alicia Browning : Yeah. And it took a lot out of me. So, don't expect another one. Come on.

  Deanna Cartwright : [pause]  If it makes you feel any better, it wasn't a very good joke.

• Deanna Cartwright : [talking about Dr. Hollander]  Anyway, I have a much higher IQ then she does

  Alicia Browning : You're IQ doesn't mean a goddamn thing in the world

• Deanna Cartwright : Yor are not coming back, are you? I'm not gonna see you again, am I?

  Alicia Browning : I'll be around.

  Deanna Cartwright : Alicia... are you real?

  Alicia Browning : [Smirks and stares at Deanna] 

  Deanna Cartwright : I mean, this whole thing, it really happened?

  Alicia Browning : [Staring at Deanna]  Good night, Deanna.

• Alicia Browning : All they'll have left to tell you is the unholy truth: that kids just die. And babies die too. It just happens. So you live with it