Paul F. Tompkins: Driven to Drink (1999 TV Special)

Craig Anton: The Bartender

Quotes 

• The Bartender : Why shouldn't someone go live in Philadelphia or Portland? Hollywood is a pit.

  Paul F. Tompkins : Pat, Hollywood is the greatest city on the face of the Earth.

  The Bartender : Oh yeah? What's so great about Hollywood?

  Paul F. Tompkins : What's? Okay, I'll tell you what's so great about it. Um, okay, the other day - I'm in my neighborhood, I'm walking to my neighborhood drug store - what do I see across the street? I see three people in Star Trek uniforms - because part of my neighborhood is Paramount Studios. Now, these people don't think anything of it. You know, they're on their way to lunch or whatever, but they're in their work clothes - and their work clothes - are Star Trek clothes! That's great!