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Tremors 3: Back to Perfection (Video 2001) Poster

Quotes

[about the FEDS]

[over radio]

Burt: Need I remind you Jack? They are not your friends, they are government agents. OVER!

Jack: [also over radio] Cut me some slack, Burt! All I did was a little negotiatin'.

Burt: You did *what*?

Jack: I cut us a deal! You help 'em catch one live graboid, they give you back your huntin' license, over.

Burt: [Burt drives up, stopping next to Jack. Jodi notices them still talking on the radio] Uhhh, copy that. Roger. One question.

Jack: Shoot.

Burt: [Off radio, getting out of the vehicle] Is your head up your ass for the warmth?

[as an ass blaster groans over Burt's compound]

Burt: Not to worry, my perimeter is completely Graboid proof.

Jodi Chang: But is it ass blaster proof.

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[after Burt blows up a shrieker herd]

Jack: Holy Sheeit! he doesn't fool around.

Jodi Chang: Burt is very uh, committed.

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Jack: I've been listening to my inner voice, and it's tellin' me that you and I are destined to work together. What do ya think?

Burt: I think if I had an inner voice, it'd be tellin' me to tell you to get lost.

[drives off]

Jack: Well, uh just give it some time. You just think about it and get back to me now.

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Burt: [after an argument about catching a live graboid. Currently glaring angrily at Jack after he "cut them a deal" with the Feds] You...

[turns gaze to the Feds]

Burt: ... say you have some sort of tranquilizer? Hmm?

Jack: [mouthing] Thank you...

Frank Stattler (Third Fed.): Yeah, we're usin' tranq darts.

[looks at Rusk]

Frank Stattler (Third Fed.): We got one to chase us, but we couldn't get these

[holds up a tranq dart with bent tip]

Frank Stattler (Third Fed.): to penetrate the dirt. I'm ordering titanium tips, and a more powerful launch-gun.

Burt: Of course, you could *squander* the tax-payers' money, but I bet I could get them to swallow *this*

[holds up a bag with tranquilizer fluid inside]

Burt: with *this*

[holds up a remote-control truck]

Burt: , for $49.95!

Agent Charlie Rusk: So, do we - do we - we have a deal? Because we wanna know what - we should do...

Burt: You guys do what you do best!

[gets into his truck with the window rolled down]

Burt: Find something simple and complicate it!

Jack: [to Rusk] It's good that he expresses himself. Repressed emotions can be real toxic.

Agent Charlie Rusk: He needs counselling...

Burt: [to Jack] Get in!

Jack: What?

Burt: You got me into this!

Burt: Well, alright!

[Runs to the truck, slides over the hood, and jumps into the truck through an open window]

Burt: Use the door!

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Burt: Have you heard from the feds?

Jack: Not since this morning. Haven't been able to raise 'em. They were chasing a Graboid.

Burt: They were chasing it? It wasn't chasing them?

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Burt: And THAT'S why we're at the top of the food chain!

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[Jack notices chains attached to the back of Burt's truck]

Jack: Somebody gettin' married?

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[after Burt blows up his home to keep the assblaster from eating the food, and finding out food stops them]

Burt: What kind of supreme being would condone such irony?

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[after Burt gets dug up from a Graboid stomach]

Burt: I prefer... we keep this... to ourselves.

Jodi Chang: Oh, you guys definitely need to be supervised.

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Burt: And people called me paranoid.

Jack: Uh, *I* don't think you're paranoid!

Miguel: I do...

[Under his breath]

Miguel: ...but not no more.

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[after Burt kills 100 shriekers with an anti-aircraft gumn mount]

Burt: Any questions?

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Miguel: The BLM man gave me permission to kill anything that represented a danger to my cattle. El lobo, el coyote, and el Graboid.

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[Suggesting names for the flying monsters]

Jodi Chang: Assblasters. How's that?

Jack: Sounds like a porno film.

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Burt: [after seeing a "Perfection Valley Ranchettes" sign by the junkyard, signifying Mel going specifically against what Burt said] The little turd!

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Jodi Chang: [after assembling a potato gun, Jodi realizes a problem] Uh, but do we have a lighter?

Jack: Burt does.

Burt: [looks up from the gun] How do you know?

Jack: Well, 'cause you're... Burt.

Burt: [presenting lighter] Damn right I am.

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Jodi Chang: Well, we discovered it right? Just like the other ones. We should name it... how about buttlauncher?

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Jack: The universe provides.

Jodi Chang: The universe provides a boat?

Jack: And a blue tarp! C'mon!

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Burt: [after everyone runs into an outhosue to hide from the assblasters] Well... let's assess the situation.

Jack: We're screwed.

Jodi Chang: We're screwed in an outhouse?

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[a graboid is just outside Burt's fence]

Burt: Now, if you'll kindly lean your endangered carcass over my property line, we'll call your untimely demise 'self defense'.

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Burt: [handing Jack a gun] You do know which end the bullets come out?

Jack: I've seen movies.

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[Melvin is trying to convince Burt to sell his house and land]

Melvin Plug: C'mon Burt, what do you say?

Burt: I say I'll give you a ten-second head start.

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Burt: I'm a masterpiece of selfdestruction.

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Jack: Burt, what happens if this thing eats your food?

Burt: [looks around at the many, many cases of MREs] Assblaster Blitzkrieg.

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Jodi Chang: [after killing an ass-blaster] Ha! Ass blaster! Blast your own damn ass!

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Burt: A lifetime of preparation, and *I* end up a refugee?

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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