Monkey Island 2: LeChuck's Revenge (1991 Video Game)
Guybrush Threepwood: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Woodchuck: A woodchuck could chuck no amount of wood since a woodchuck couldn't chuck wood.
Guybrush Threepwood: But if a woodchuck could chuck and would chuck some amount of wood, what amount of wood would a woodchuck chuck?
Woodchuck: Even if a woodchuck could chuck wood, and even if a woodchuck would chuck wood, should a woodchuck chuck wood?
Guybrush Threepwood: A woodchuck should chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, as long as a woodchuck would chuck wood.
Woodchuck: Oh, shut up!
[Looking at a bust in Elaine Marley's room]
Guybrush: You know I heard some guys talking about Marleys bust, this must be it.
Largo LaGrande: You're making me Mad Marty.
Marty: That's my name, don't wear it out.
Herman Toothrot: If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, what color is the tree?
[the player must now go through 40 or so answers before finally being allowed to select:]
Guybrush: All colors?
Herman Toothrot: Exactly. Now, what has this experience taught you?
Guybrush: That philosophy isn't worth my time.
Herman Toothrot: I'm very impressed. It takes most people years to reach this point.
Largo LaGrande: You're not from these parts are ya? This here's a toll bridge you've got to pay.
Guybrush: Is this some sort of bribery situation?
Largo LaGrande: No more like extortion, here allow me to demonstrate.
[Picks up Guybrush and holds him upside down over the side of the bridge]
Guybrush: If I could just reach my pirate utility belt...
[after finding out LeChuck will be brought back to life]
Guybrush: He's going to come after me!
Voodoo Lady: Yes.
Guybrush: He's going to try to kill me!
Voodoo Lady: Undoubtedly.
Guybrush: Can you just kill me now and get it over with?
Guybrush Threepwood: I'm on a whole new adventure.
Bart: Growing a mustache?
Guybrush Threepwood: No. Bigger than that.
Bart: A beard?
Guybrush Threepwood: That's the second biggest monkey head I've ever seen!
Guybrush Threepwood: Do you like my new beard?
Voodoo Lady: There's only one way to escape from Lechuck.
Guybrush Threepwood: How?
Voodoo Lady: You're doing it right now.
Guybrush Threepwood: Fiddling with the change in my pocket?
LeChuck: I... am your brother!
Guybrush Threepwood: No! No, that's not true!
LeChuck: Search your feelings, you KNOW it to be true!
Guybrush Threepwood: Noooooooooooooooooooo!
Guybrush Threepwood: Hey, dynamite... just like it says on the side!
Rapp Scallion: Now I can finally rest within the fold of the earth... like a Steamin' Weenie on a hot bun.
Voodoo Lady: Two, four, six, eight, who do we assassinate? Largo, Largo, yeah!
[Guybrush is being mugged by Largo LaGrande]
Guybrush: HEEELP! Police!
Largo: HA! Scream all you want, there are no police on Scabb Island.
Guybrush: Then who eats all the doughnuts and roughs up the transients?
[LeChuck has captured Guybrush and Wally and explained them the intricate torture mechanism]
LeChuck: Do you know what happens next?
Guybrush: Umm... Well...
LeChuck: I will then take your bones, still alive and in great pain, and make them into a chair. I will call it "My Screaming Chair". Every day I will sit in it and listen to you scream. Any questions?
[LeChuck soon gets tired of Guybrush's stupid questions and leaves the scene]
Wally: He didn't say what he was going to do to me!
Guybrush: An ottoman comes to mind.
Rapp Scallion: Violets are blue. Roses are read. We're coming aboard. Prepare to eat lead.
Guybrush Threepwood: Leg or no leg, I trust you about as far as I could throw Manhattan.
Guybrush: Have you ever tried conditioner on that beard?
[while hanging over a pit of acid]
Guybrush: Could you scratch my nose?
Wally: Yeah, right after you kiss my butt.
[Using Voodoo doll on Largo]
Guybrush: Take that you stumpy little dim-witted toad!
[to Elaine Marley]
Guybrush: So? You and the gardener, eh?
Lechuck: Largo you've been my trusted henchman for many years but I will not hesitate to drag your entrails from the back of my ship if you do not bring me Guybrush Threepwood before he finds that treasure!
[after Governor Phatt has said that LeChuck is offering a large bounty for Guybrush's capture]
Guybrush: I bet that money could buy a lot of bacon grease and pure fat, huh?
Guybrush: They don't call me the Bone Master for nothin'!
Guybrush Threepwood: She named the dog Guybrush?